CHAPTER XLII
GEORGE III. AN OBSTINATE KING
George III was a Bad King. He was, however, to a great extent insane and a Good Man and his ministers were always called Pitt. The Pitts, like Pretenders, generally came in waves of about two, an elder Pitt and a younger Pitt.
BRITAIN MUFFLES THROUGH
The elder Pitt (Clapham) at this time had the rather strategic idea of conquering Canada on the banks of the Elbe; learning, however, that it was not there, he told the famous poetic general, Wolfe, to conquer Quebec instead. At first Wolfe complained that he would rather write Gray’s Elegy, but on being told that it had been written already (by Gray) he agreed to take Quebec.
Quebec was very difficult to approach; Wolfe therefore rowed up the St. Laurence with muffled drums and ordered his Highland troops to skirl up the perpendicular Heights of Abraham with muffled boots, hoots, etc., thus taking the French by surprise.
At this engagement the French had a very peculiar general with the unusual French name of Keep-calm.
Wave of Pitts
On receiving a muffled report to the effect that Wolfe’s men had captured Quebec, one of his aides-de-calm called out: “See! They fly!” “Who fly?” asked the General, and, on being assured that it was his own men who were flying, “Thank God!” said Keep-calm, with a sigh of satisfaction: “Now, I can fly in peace!”
Britain muffles through