MARCH 1: Lucy’s Tonsils
Now, there were two tonsils and they had made their home in Lucy’s throat.
Tonsils always make their homes in throats. They do not care for other kinds of homes.
They are all alike in that way.
Now people are very different. Some people like to have their homes in country places. Others like to have their homes in big cities where there are crowds and crowds of people.
Still others like to have their homes in seaside places, so they can be neighbors of dear old Mother Ocean.
But tonsils like to make their homes in throats. And these twin Tonsils were in Lucy’s throat.
One Tonsil was named Ton Tonsil and the other was Tom Tonsil.
“Hello, Ton,” said Tom, “are you up to mischief?”
“Indeed I am,” said Ton. “I’m causing trouble. How about you?”
“Doing all I can think of and I’ve a good many pranks left to play, too,” said Tom. “I tell you what, we have a loyal and faithful little friend in Susy Sore Throat. She’s a mean one.
“She’s a good playmate for us. She’s going to be with us to-day. Gracious me, it’s surprising how Susy does turn up, and half the time no one knows from where she comes.
“She’s going to bring her little half-brother along with her—you know—Ronald Raw Throat. They’re very fond of being together.”
“I think we’ll have a fine party,” said Ton Tonsil. “I feel puffed up with excitement already.”
“So do I,” said Tom.
“I tell you Lucy’s throat is a fine home for us,” said Ton.
“Yes,” said Tom, “it’s gorgeous. We have had lots of room to grow big with pride, and we have. We’ve grown big with Tonsil pride.
“They say it’s not nice for Tonsils to grow so proud because they’ve nothing to be proud of—but gracious me, that is just the point.
“Things that have no reason to be puffed up and proud are usually the kind that are most conceited.
“And those creatures who are modest and not conceited are usually the ones who can do things. You’ll almost always find it is that way.”
“That’s the way it usually is,” said Ton. “Well, we mustn’t talk any more. We must get bigger and bigger and just let Lucy know we’re making ourselves quite at home in her throat.
“In fact, she needn’t think she has any rights to her own throat. We’re the ones with rights.”
“And don’t forget us,” said the little Adenoid Cousins. “Don’t forget us.”
“We won’t,” said the Tonsil Twins. “We won’t forget you.”
Along then came Susy Sore Throat and Ronald Raw Throat, and Carrie Cold came too, and so did Clarence Cough. Oh, they all came and had a party in Lucy’s throat.
Well, they liked the party so much that they came again and again. Sometimes they had little parties and sometimes big parties.
One day, however, Lucy decided to let her Tonsils know that they could not make their home any longer in her throat.
So she went to the big doctor who had promised to take them out and who had told her that she would get rid of those wretched little Twins.
It wasn’t pleasant to think of getting rid of the Twins. They wouldn’t come out by a mere kind word. No, they had to be cut out. Harsh ways had to be used with them. But Lucy was brave—and she knew that once she got rid of those wretches her throat would never again be the place for the Tonsil parties.
So the big doctor took the Tonsil Twins out and their Adenoid Cousins along with them, and the Tonsils wept red tears as they left Lucy, but they said each to the other:
“It was all our fault for behaving as we did!”