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A Comic History of the United States

Chapter 15: CHAPTER XII.
By Livingston Hopkins
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About This Book

A satirical illustrated chronicle offers a humorous retelling of American history through caricatures and witty commentary. The author lampoons early exploration and colonial foundations, sketches the peculiarities of individual colonies, and satirizes relations among settlers, indigenous peoples, and rival European powers. Later sections treat imperial policies, episodes leading to rebellion, and key Revolutionary moments, blending pictorial gags with playful narration. Each chapter pairs observations on local customs, political disputes, and notable events with exaggerated illustrations, producing an irreverent, episodic survey that emphasizes comic perspective over strict accuracy.

CHAPTER XII.

MARYLAND SETTLED—WHAT’S IN A NAME?—PECULIAR MONETARY SYSTEM.

Lord Baltimore was the oldest inhabitant of Maryland. He named it after Mrs. Charles II, whose maiden name was Henrietta Maria.

The name Henrietta Marialand was found rather unhandy for so small a province, so he afterwards cut it down to Maryland.

The first settlement was made at the mouth of the Potomac river by a colony of English ladies and gentlemen. They lived chiefly upon green corn and tobacco, which they cultivated in large quantities. When they ran out of funds the latter staple became their currency—the leaf tobacco being the paper money or “greenbacks,” and the same dried, mixed with molasses and pressed into blocks or “plugs,” represented specie or “hard money.” During the growth of the crop it was customary for the capitalist to dig up his stalks every night before going to bed, (previously watering them,) and lock them up in a patent burglar-proof safe, getting up before sunrise next morning to replant them.

The inflation or depression of the money market depended more or less upon the success of the tobacco crop, and as the soil was new there was seldom a panic. One phase of the old Maryland monetary system is graphically set forth on page 79.

“Liquidation”