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Absurd Ditties

Chapter 15: XII. THAT OF PASHA ABDULLA BEY.
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About This Book

A collection of short comic poems and sketches presenting a parade of ludicrous incidents and eccentric personae. Each piece is a self-contained vignette in playful rhyme, often headed as the tale of a particular figure, and delivers light social satire, puns, and ironic reversals. Forms range from brief ditties and ballades to longer narrative verses, and the volume mixes domestic farce, topical parody, and whimsical fantasy, with jaunty rhythm and illustrative plates underscoring its breezy, absurd sensibility.

Abdulla Bey—a Pasha—had
A turn for joy and merriment:
You never caught him looking sad,
Nor glowering in discontent.
His normal attitude was one
Of calm, serene placidity;
His nature gay, and full of fun,
And free from all acidity.
A trifling instance I'll relate
Of Pasha Bey's urbanity,
The which will clearly indicate
His marvellous humanity.
He had a dozen wives or so
(In him no immorality;
For Eastern custom, as you know,
Permits, of wives, plurality).
But, oh! how rare it is to find
A dozen ladies who'll consent
To think as with a single mind,
And live together in content.
Abdulla's wives—altho', no doubt,
If taken individually,
Would never think of falling out,—
Collectively, could not agree.
At first, in quite a playful way,
They quarrelled—rather prettily;
Then cutting things contrived to say
About each other wittily;
Then petty jealousies and sneers
Began,—just feeble flickerings—
Which grew, alas! to bitter tears,
And fierce domestic bickerings.
Abdulla Bey, however, he
Was not the one to be dismayed,
And doubtless you'll astounded be
To hear what wisdom he displayed.
He did not—as some would have done—
Seek angry ladies to coerce;
He did not use to any one
Expressions impolite—or worse.