EVANS
Trib, trib, fairies; come; and remember your parts:
be pold, I pray you; follow me into the pit; and when
I give the watch ’ords, do as I pid you: Come,
come; trib, trib.
[They conceal themselves.
A distant chiming sounds as Falstaff enters, disguised
as Herne, wearing a stag’s head with great horns.]
FALSTAFF
The Windsor bell hath struck twelve; the minute
draws on. Now, the hot-blooded gods assist me!
Remember, Jove, thou wast a bull for thy Europa;
love set on thy horns. O powerful love! That, in
some respects, makes a beast a man, in some other
a man a beast.
CALIBAN
[Listening intently near the edge of the scene.]
A man a beast!
FALSTAFF
Think on ’t, Jove: Where gods have hot backs, what shall
poor men do? For me, I am here a Windsor stag; and
the fattest, I think, i’ the forest. Send me a cool
rut-time, Jove! Who comes here? My doe?
[Enter Mistress Ford and Mistress Page.]
MRS. FORD
Sir John! Art thou there, my deer? My male deer?
FALSTAFF
My doe with the black scut! Let the sky rain potatoes,
let it thunder to the tune of green sleeves; I will
shelter me here.
MRS. FORD
Mistress Page is come with me, sweetheart.
FALSTAFF
Divide me like a bribe buck, each a haunch: Am I a
woodman, ha? Speak I like Herne the hunter?
As I am a true spirit, welcome!
[Noise within.]
MRS. PAGE
Alas, what noise?
MRS. FORD
Heaven forgive our sins!
FALSTAFF
What should this be?
MRS. PAGE AND MRS. FORD
Away! Away!
[They run off.]
FALSTAFF
I think the devil will not have me damned, lest the oil
that’s in me should set hell on fire; he would never
else cross me thus.
[Enter Sir Hugh Evans, disguised as before; Pistol,
as Hobgoblin; Mistress Quickly, Anne Page, and
others as Fairies, with tapers.]
MRS. QUICKLY
Fairies, black, gray, green, and white,
You moonshine revellers, and shades of night,
You orphan heirs of fixed destiny,
Attend your office and your quality.
Crier Hobgoblin, make the fairy oyes.
PISTOL
Elves, list your names; silence, you airy toys!
FALSTAFF
They are fairies; he that speaks to them shall die:
I’ll wink and couch: no man their works must eye.
[He lies upon his face.]
EVANS
Where’s Bede? Go you, and where you find a maid
That, ere she sleeps, has thrice her prayers said,
Raise up the organs of her fantasy;
Sleep she as sound as careless infancy!
But those as sleep and think not on their sins
Pinch them, arms, legs, backs, shoulders, sides, and shins!
CALIBAN
[Growing excitedly absorbed.]
Ha, pinch them, saith!
MRS. QUICKLY
Away; disperse: but till ’tis one o’clock,
Our dance of custom round about the oak
Of Herne the hunter, let us not forget.
EVANS
Pray you, lock hand in hand; yourselves in order set;
And twenty glow-worms shall our lanterns be
To guide our measure round about the tree.
But, stay; I smell a man of middle-earth.
FALSTAFF
Heaven defend me from that Welsh fairy, lest he
transform me to a piece of cheese!
PISTOL
Vile worm, thou wast o’erlook’d even in thy birth.
MRS. QUICKLY
With trial-fire touch me his finger-end:
If he be chaste, the flame will back descend
And turn him to no pain; but if he start,
It is the flesh of a corrupted heart.
PISTOL
A trial, come.
EVANS
Come, will this wood take fire?
[They burn him with their tapers.]
FALSTAFF
Oh! Oh! Oh!
CALIBAN
[Crying out.]
Ah, ah! They plague him, too!
MRS. QUICKLY
Corrupt, corrupt, and tainted in desire!
About him, Fairies; sing a scornful rhyme;
And, as you trip, still pinch him to your time.
ALL
[As they dance about him, pinch, burn him, and sing:]
Fie on sinful fantasy!
Fie on lust and luxury!
Lust is but a bloody fire
Kindled with unchaste desire,
Fed in heart, whose flames aspire
As thoughts do blow them, higher and higher.
Pinch him, Fairies, mutually;
Pinch him for his villany;
Pinch him, and burn him, and turn him about,
Till candles and starlight and moonshine be out!
FALSTAFF
[Rising and pulling off his buck’s head, cries out:]
Oh! Oh! Oh!
[As he is about to flee, tormented by the dancing figures,
THE CLOUDY CURTAINS CLOSE