You should suggest contrasts between yourself and ordinary job seekers or employees. When you present your qualifications for a promotion or for a raise, you will be sure of succeeding if you are able to get across to your employer's mind the true idea that your services in the future may be different and deserving of more reward than the services for which you have previously been paid.
When an employee asks for more money because other men are being paid higher wages in the same office, or because he has prospects of better pay elsewhere, or even because of increased costs of living, he makes an unfavorable impression on the man from whom he requests a raise. His purpose in presenting his claims is evidently selfish. He appears to be looking out only for Number One, and the employer naturally looks out for his Number One when responding. By using methods that suggest a wholly selfish purpose, the applicant decreases his chances of gaining what he desires. Yet most employees ask for raises in just this way.
Contrast the impression made when an employee approaches the boss with a carefully planned demonstration of his capability for increased service, as the basis of a proposal that he be promoted or given a higher salary. He comes into "the old man's" office with an attitude that produces a favorable impression. When he explains exactly what he is doing, or can do if permitted, that is deserving of more reward than he has been receiving, he presents the idea of a "quid pro quo" to his "prospect," just as the salesman of goods presents the idea of value in fair exchange for price.
If the service now being rendered by the employee, or the new service he wishes permission to render, is really worth more money to the employer, the applicant for a raise is practically certain to get it, provided he has chosen a fair boss. And, of course, a good salesman of himself does not go to work in the first place until he has prospected the squareness and fair-mindedness of the employer.
A young woman was employed in a secretarial capacity shortly before the world war began. In the course of the next two years her salary was voluntarily doubled by her employer. But her necessary expenses increased in proportion; so she was able to save no more money (in purchasing power) than it would have been possible for her to put in the bank if there had been no increase either in her earnings or in the cost of living. That is, if the war had not happened, and she had continued at work for two years without any raise at all, she would have been practically as well off at the end of that time as she actually found herself with her doubled pay.
As the months of her employment passed, she had made herself progressively much more valuable to her employer. She was rendering him now a very large amount of high-grade service. But in effect she was being paid no more money than when she was engaged. The young woman knew her employer intended to be fair with her. Undoubtedly he felt he had treated her well by voluntarily doubling her salary in two years. If she had gone to him and had asked for more pay in the manner of the ordinary applicant for a raise; if she had stated her request without skillfully showing the difference between actual conditions and his misconception of the facts; she likely would have made an unfavorable impression. But she was a good saleswoman of her ideas. She made a discriminative-restrictive plan of approach to gain her object, and used first-class selling skill to get into her employer's mind a true conception of her worth to him.
She compiled from her budget the exact amount of increased living costs. The comparative figures of two years showed that her necessary expenses were approximately double what they had been before the war. Then she used the percentage ratio to demonstrate in neat typewriting that approximately all of her salary increases had gone to some one else, and had not remained in her hands. On another sheet she typed a summary of the most important business responsibilities she carried for her employer at present, but which she had not been qualified nor trusted to bear when she was first engaged. The secretary brought the two exhibits to the desk of the business man, laid them before him with brief explanations of what they represented, and concluded with a simple personal statement which she worded most carefully.
"Mr. Blank, I know you mean to be perfectly square with me. So I want you to realize what has been the actual purchasing power of the salary I have received, and what I have done with it. This percentage slip shows that my additional pay was all used for additional expenses. I have been unable to increase my savings. I really have been paid only for the same kind of services I was able to render when you employed me. Now I know how to do all these additional things." She pointed to the list typed on the second sheet of paper. "In effect, I haven't been paid anything for them, you see. I am sure you have not appreciated the difference between the increased service I have rendered, and the buying power of the raises you have meant to give me but which have all gone to some one else. Please study these lists. I believe you will feel that I am earning a larger salary and really am worth more to you than two years ago."
Her "different" approach gained the secretary not only an immediate increase of fifty per cent in her salary; but five hundred dollars back pay that her fair-minded employer was convinced she should have received.
Such an approach commands the respect of the prospect. It is the approach of an equal, not of an inferior. So greatly does it reduce the chances of failure that the salesman is practically certain to succeed in his purpose.
Recognize that the initiative in gaining your chance should be in your own hands. Do not wait for any opportunity to come to you. "Go to it." Go prepared to control the situation you have planned to create, but be ready also to meet unexpected possibilities. The object of the master salesman in his preparation is not only to make the selling process easy, but also to meet any difficulties he can foresee that may arise to block him. He is ready to take full advantage of favorable conditions he has planned to meet, and is equally ready for turn-downs. If you use the discriminative-restrictive method to gain admission to the presence and into the mind of your prospect, it is altogether unlikely that you will be denied the chance you seek. Nevertheless go loaded for refusals. Be ready with the quick come-back to every turn-down you can imagine.
A clerk in a real estate office wanted an opportunity to prove that he was capable of selling. Times were very hard, and the firm had flatly announced that it would not promote anybody or grant any raises. But this clerk, who had made up his mind to secure a salesman's job, carefully prepared a plan of approach before he went to the president's office. His ostensible purpose was to get a raise; so he had worked out an ingenious reply to every objection he could imagine his employer might make to paying him more money. But he really wanted a different job, not just a larger salary.
He tackled the "old man" at a selected time when he knew the president would not be busy. One after another, in quick succession, he came back at every reason given for turning him down on his application for additional pay. Finally the cornered employer stated frankly that the clerk was entitled to a raise, but as frankly said it could not be granted because of general business conditions. The applicant, having gained his immediate object by proving his worth, then switched to the second part of his plan of approach.
"I didn't expect more money for my clerical work, but haven't I proved to you by the way I handle turn-downs that I possess the qualifications of a salesman? It would be just as hard for a prospect to say 'No' to me as it has been for you. I don't want a raise. I want a chance at selling real estate. Give me a drawing account equal to my present salary, and I'll earn it in commissions. I'm going to make it hard for anybody to get away from me after I tackle him to buy a lot or a house."
Of course the clerk got his chance.
Another important detail of good salesmanship in planning to approach opportunities to succeed, is touching the tender spots of the subordinates in the office of the big man you want to reach. Also plan to touch tender spots in him. You can do it with a courteous bow, or with the tone of respect. Employ the personal appeal—that is, make contact between your personality and the personality of the other party you desire to influence. There is no better way than by manifesting your real friendliness. One who comes as a friend is able to feel and to appear at ease. The bearing of perfect ease makes the excellent impression of true equality in manhood, and helps very greatly in gaining for one a chance to succeed.
Sometimes self-respect will require you to use very forceful methods to secure the opportunity you desire. A snippy clerk may refuse you admittance to the private office. The big man himself may send out word that he will not receive you, or perhaps he will attempt to dismiss you brusquely after you are granted an audience. So be prepared to manifest your strength, as well as your resourcefulness, should such force of personality be needed in any imaginable situation. If you have planned exactly how you will show your strength, you will make the impression when you manifest it actually that you are strong in fact, and not just a bluffer. Often you can prove your strength by looking another person fearlessly in the eye.
It is evident from what has already been outlined that to make a successful approach one needs particular qualifications. There are four essentials: First, mental alertness in perceiving; Second, good memory for retaining the impressions received; Third, constructive imagination in planning the approach; Fourth, friendly courage in securing an audience and in making the actual approach to the mind of the other man.
All your senses must be wide awake if you are to perceive every point of difference that can be used effectively to sell your particular ideas in contrast with ordinary ideas.
It is necessary not only that you see distinctions clearly, but that you be able to remember them instantly, when you need to use them in selling your ideas.
You cannot make any certainly successful plan to deal with a future possible chance unless you cultivate your power of imagination by working out in advance every conceivable situation that may be anticipated.
And all your other capabilities in gaining your chance will be of no avail if your purpose meets resistance; unless you are equipped beforehand with friendly courage, the kind of real bravery that is likable.
It is highly important to your success that you be able to make the impression that you are a person of genius. Genius, analyzed, is no more than the exceptional application of natural ability to doing work. Application demands complete attention. Attention leads to discrimination. Discrimination concentrates, of course, upon the recognition of differences. And differentiation depends principally upon sense training in alertness. Unless a sense is very keen, it cannot make distinctions sharply. So we get back to the primary necessity of developing all your senses and of keeping them wide awake to perceive and act upon chances for success.
Your discriminative power of perception will be well-nigh valueless to you, however, if you are unable to recall whenever needed, all the points of difference possible to utilize in your salesmanship. Therefore you should train your memory. We will not enlarge just now upon this factor of the process of making success certain; because in previous chapters and also in the companion book, "The Selling Process," the right methods of developing a good memory are indicated.
The value of constructive imagination, not only in planning your entrance to the physical presence and into the mind of the prospect, but all through your salesmanship, cannot be over emphasized. If you are to gain your chance with another man, you must be able to see imaginary future situations, through his eyes. In advance of your interview it is necessary that you imagine yourself in his place when a caller like yourself is received.
Some so-called "realists" condemn imagination. They say it is apt to make men visionary and unable to recognize and meet successfully the every-day problems of life. But the big men of finance, industry, and politics have become pre-eminent because of the fertility and productiveness of their imaginations. What the "hard-headed" man condemns is not imagination, but inability to use it constructively. He deprecates imagination not carried into action. Constructive imagination, however, has always been man's greatest aid in making progress.
In order to develop your constructive imagination most effectively you must follow certain laws with regard to the re-adjustment of parts, qualities, or attributes of things you know. You can re-construct an idea; (1) by merely enlarging an old mental image; or (2) by diminishing the size of the previous image; or (3) by separating a composite image into its parts; or (4) by imaging each part as a whole.
Let us illustrate how these laws of constructive imagination might be applied effectively in planning the approach to a prospective employer.
He perhaps has an idea that the possibilities of the job you want are limited. You should plan to enlarge the picture of your possible service and to show that you could do more things than he is likely to expect of you.
So you can diminish his idea of the salary you want, by planning to show him that in proportion to the enlarged service you purpose to render, the pay you ask is not really big.
In order to make him appreciate better just what your contemplated job means, you can separate it into the different functions you will perform. The mere fact that the job has a great many parts will be effective in impressing him with the idea that it is worth more pay.
Then you can take each part or function of your job and show it as a whole opportunity. For instance, if you are a correspondent, you might demonstrate just how letters of different length could be spaced on the stationery to develop a uniformly artistic impression that would help to get more business by mail.
All your imaginative powers can be made to work together to accomplish the one certain result you desire. "Constructive imagination is always characterized by a definite purpose, which never is lost sight of until the image is complete."
Thousands of men have failed, after getting right up to the door of opportunity, because they had to turn away in order to screw up their courage. No one can hope to succeed if he lacks the quality of bravery necessary to gain chances.
True bravery is not cockiness or swaggering. It is simply a kindly self-confidence that makes no impression of a threat to others, and gives no suggestion that the man who has it feels there is the slightest reason for being afraid of anybody else.
Really, if you have planned just how to approach each prospect with a true service purpose, there is no one in the world you need to fear. Lack of courage is usually due to lack of preparation for what might be anticipated. Sometimes a man is fearful of another because of his own consciousness that he has come to that other man principally for the purpose of taking something away from him. This consciousness causes a guilty feeling, which undermines courage. If through imaginative planning you know in advance about what to expect, and if you feel your intentions toward your prospect are absolutely square, you will not be afraid to seek your chance anywhere. Your courage will not ooze.
True courage is based on a permanent consciousness of right feeling and thinking, coupled with the sense of power that is expressed in the maxim, "Right is might." Such courage can be developed by the discriminative-restrictive process with absolute certainty, as is explained in the companion book, "The Selling Process."
Our study of plans of approach would be incomplete without emphasizing the prime necessity for a big mental outlook. To assure your success in gaining the chances you want it is necessary that you vision imaginary situations of the future and fit into them the facts you know now or may be able to learn.
However, you cannot develop maximum skill in gaining your chances if you are unable to learn anything except through personal experience. Personal experience is valuable, no doubt. But you must develop the ability to think out the significance of other men's experiences, and must be capable of applying what you learn to your own imaginary use.
The big view-point, the ability to learn from observation as well as from experience, will develop in you broad and varied conceptions of other men. It will make you tolerant of characteristics that differ widely from your own. You will respect the view-point of the other fellow, and will recognize that he may be perfectly fair in his attitude and opinions, however widely he may differ from your ideas. Your big mental outlook should make you feel friendly toward him as your prospect, and you can make the approach of courage that is friendly.
Perhaps you will meet opposition to your entrance when you come to gain your chance. It is likely that some sentry in the outer office of your prospect, or the sentry of his own mind when you reach his presence, may halt you at the portal of opportunity with the challenge, "Who goes there?"
Your answer should be spoken confidently, "A friend."
The test will then be made by the sentry, "Advance, friend, and give the countersign."
The secret pass-word to Opportunity is, "Service."
Prove you know the countersign, speak it with courage, and you will find yourself no longer an object of suspicion, no longer regarded as a possible enemy.
You have nothing to fear if you plan to approach your prospect as a true friend who has come with a carefully thought out, intelligent offer of service that he lacks.
CHAPTER VII
Knowledge of Other Men
We have seen how you can make certain of gaining your introductory chance. Now we are to consider the first step in the most effective use of this opportunity to begin building your own success.
Let us say that you have chosen a particular man as the sort of employer with whom you want to work. Your prospecting has convinced you that in his business you have found the right market for your present services and a promising field for the future big success you are ambitious to achieve. Therefore you wish to sell him a true idea of your best capabilities. We will assume that you have passed the threshold of his private office, but your object in calling upon him has not yet entered his thoughts and feelings.
Before you state the ideas and service intention you have brought, make certain of the best possible reception from him. You need to take every practicable precaution against being rebuffed. You want to assure yourself of a welcome. Having gained this chance to start the sale of your capabilities, it is of vital importance not to take the next step in the selling process blindly, lest you stumble. Hence you should size up the other man before you announce your purpose in calling. What you may learn from reading his character correctly will help you to gain admittance into his mind for your ideas. It should assure a welcome from his heart for your sincere desire to serve him.
Golden opportunities to succeed in a particular business cannot be unlocked with a skeleton key of knowledge about human nature. Knowledge of all men supplies merely the shaft and general shape of the key blank, which must then be notched and filed to fit the characteristics of the individual whose mind and heart you wish to open for the admission of your ideas and feelings. Unless you can get into that one mind and that one heart with your service purpose, you will be shut out from the opportunity you want. It is important that you know the traits of men in general, of course. Such knowledge, however, should be supplemented by a specific and true conception of the particular man through whom you hope to reach your chance to succeed.
Do not confuse in your present thoughts the process of prospecting the characteristics of a man before meeting him, with the later process of sizing him up at the time of the interview. It is highly important to accumulate in advance as much knowledge as possible of your prospect's individual traits. But what you learned about your chosen future employer before you gained the chance to present your ideas to him in his office should be used merely as a guide in sizing him up on the spot.
Take nothing for granted now. Through your personal, specific observation either confirm or disprove every item of information that has come to you from other people previous to meeting this man face to face. Your informants may or may not have had correct conceptions of his characteristics. It would be unwise, even unsafe, for you to rely implicitly on their judgment of him. You need to be certain you know him as he really is; so that you can present your purpose with the confidence a skilled salesman feels when he is sure he understands the principal traits of the prospect he is addressing. In reaching this man you have gained your first chance. You cannot afford to risk losing it by haste. Do not advance farther in the selling process until you have made certain of the ground you are to tread. It is very bad salesmanship to begin introducing ideas and feelings to a mind and heart that are unknown to you except from hearsay.
"But," you say, "I'm not a mind reader. And I can't look into another man's heart."
True. Yet you should be able to read the signs of his thoughts; which he manifests in his words, tones, and acts. And you need not see into his heart to know what it contains; since fundamentally all men are much alike at heart. Just look clearly into your own heart at its best. You will find there the basic emotions and feelings that civilized men have in common everywhere.
Character analysis by "types" is unreliable. I believe as little in phrenology as in palm-reading. I have directed thousands of men in business. Personal experience has proved to me that the permanent structure of a particular human body is not an invariably true index to the characteristics of the inner, or ego man who owns that body.
He has had no control over the color of his hair or eyes. He cannot reshape the bones of his face, nor alter the bumps on his head. To believe that such permanent structural details of the "natural" outer man determine or denote the peculiar aptitudes of the inner man is to credit the exploded doctrine of fore-ordination.
Therefore, when you have gained the chance to present your capabilities for sale to a chosen prospect with whom you believe you will have the best opportunities to succeed, and when you are swiftly shaping your presentation plans to fit his personality, don't size up merely the factors of his make-up with which he was born. You will be apt to mistake his true character if you have come to his office with the delusion that the blonde type of man is fundamentally different in nature from the brunette type. Get out of your head any misconception that a man is foredoomed to practically certain failure in a particular career because he has a big nose, sloping brow, and receding chin; and that another man with a snub nose, bulging forehead, and protruding jaw is destined almost surely to succeed if he selects a certain vocation. No "mind man" with a normal, healthy body is limited in his possibilities of success by being born with red, or black, or tow hair; or because the bones of his head happen to be shaped in a particular way. The ego is the master, not the slave, of the body.
The true signs of character are to be read only in the words, tones, and movements of a man—and in his muscle structure as he has developed it or has left it undeveloped. We already have seen in a previous chapter how a mind center and its co-ordinated set of muscles develop each other. So the positive characteristics of the inner man are revealed clearly by the muscle structure built up by his habits of thinking and feeling and action. On the other hand, his deficiency in certain mental and emotional development is indicated negatively by his lack of the muscle structure that naturally would be co-ordinate with such development.
The relation of muscular development to mental development, as explained in an earlier chapter, suggests the one sure way to judge a man's habits of thinking. Observe discriminatingly his various muscle structures, and his muscle activities in detail. The development of certain sets of muscles proves a co-ordinate development of the mind centers most directly connected with these muscle structures. Similarly the mental action of a man is indicated by his physical manifestations with his muscles in movements.
Hence if you learn to read the mental significance of particular muscle structures and of particular muscle actions, you will be able to size up both the habits of thought (individual characteristics) of a man, and what he happens to be thinking at the time you come to present your services or ideas for sale.
Before going on with our study of the subject of this chapter, let us summarize the preceding pages to make sure that we know thoroughly the somewhat difficult but very important ground we have gone over thus far.
You chose a certain man as your prospective employer because you believe that if you succeed in associating yourself with him you will have the best opportunities to achieve your ambition. You are now standing in his presence. You need to size up his true character quickly in order that you may be sure of presenting your capabilities in the particular way that is likely to be most effective with him. You wish to impress this one man with right ideas of your qualities and their value. You want him to perceive that he lacks and requires just such services as you purpose to offer for sale. You realize it is unsafe for you to jump at conclusions about his characteristics. You pause briefly to size him up before presenting your proposition, rather than to proceed blindly in ignorance of his habits of thought, and with no clue to what he happens to be thinking at the time you call. You must know all it is possible to find out on the spot regarding him.
You cannot be certain of his characteristics if you judge him solely by what Nature forced on him. But you can be absolutely sure if you size him up by observing what he has done with his birthright, and if you are then able to interpret correctly what you perceive. Your prospect has had nothing to do with the shape and size of his head. His fair or dark complexion is inherited. He is utterly unable to control the color of his hair or eyes. His muscle structure, however, is a development that he has accomplished himself. If he has a firm jaw, the jaw muscles, not the jaw bone, signify the characteristics of a firm mentality. Judge the physical man he has made by his habits of living under the government of his mind. Disregard such physical details of his appearance as he cannot help. The made man is the true image of the ego. It is this ego of your prospective employer you need to know, for your chance to succeed in your purpose with him depends on the inner man you must convince and persuade. Therefore restrict your size-up to the discriminative observation of the muscle signs of his mind habits and mind actions.
Recall now, or re-read the second chapter of this book. There you studied the principles of restrictive-discriminative growth—the Burbank method of developing selected qualities of manhood. That chapter related to your cultivation of particular characteristics within yourself. The same principles will guide you with equal certainty in acquiring knowledge of other men.
Every mental characteristic of your prospect about which you need to know has physical indications that can be perceived, and translated into certain knowledge of details of his character. You have studied the co-relation of your mind and body in mutual development. You may be sure that similar processes of development have produced like effects in the case of the man you have come to see. You know exactly how to grow particular qualities within yourself, by using your muscles to develop corresponding mind centers and vice versa. You can read another man's mind by observing his muscle structure and muscle action, and by then interpreting the mental significance of what you perceive.
To repeat and emphasize again what already has been said about knowing the heart of another man—you need but look into your own breast to find there the finest basic characteristics of the human heart in general. As Kipling wrote, "The Colonel's lady and Judy O'Grady are sisters under their skins." All men are fundamentally alike at the bottoms of their hearts, however much they may differ in the individual traits they have grafted upon their common root of human nature.
So when you are sizing up your prospect, you should comprehend that the most effective way to get to his heart is through such an appeal as would reach the heart of every man. Know your own heart surely, then, in order to be certain of knowing his. All human hearts respond similarly to manifestations of courage, nobility, love, faith, honor, and the like. We laugh and cry at the same humor and pathos. Our feelings are closely akin. We differ from one another only in our minds. Our individual, acquired habits of thought affect but the degrees of our several heart responses to the gamut of fundamental emotional appeals.
Knowledge of another man, then, involves first, comprehension that he is like every other man in his emotions, and unlike all other men in the way he thinks. To a trained observer his habits of thought are clearly indicated by his muscle structure and muscle action. Exhaustive prolonged analysis is unnecessary. You can learn to read quickly the mental significance of the comparatively small number of details of muscle structure and action that constitute a fairly complete index to his character. Then you will be able to judge with certainty practically all the traits of which you need to be sure in order to make the most effective presentation of your services for sale to this particular man.
The value of such a dependable size-up can scarcely be over-estimated. It is not easy to gain the initial chance to present your capabilities to the one man with whom you have chosen to be associated. But it would be tremendously harder to win a second opportunity to sell your services after failing the first time. By sizing him up aright while you are presenting your qualifications for his consideration, you will be able to avoid making unfavorable impressions. You can also adapt your salesmanship to creating the best possible impression of your capabilities and their fitness to his especial needs.
Sometimes a man seeking to gain the big chance that he believes would open the door to success fails to secure his opportunity because he is disconcerted by a gruff reception that he misconstrues as personal to him. He wrongly interprets natural self-defense as a sign of habitual crabbedness.
A big man often thinks he is "hunted" by people who want to make him the prey of their own purposes. The employer you have chosen as the means of reaching the goal of your ambition may feel suspicious of your object in approaching him. He is likely to assume an attitude of extreme reserve, or even of icy indifference. Possibly his manner will be curt and sharp. Size up such a reception as just his way of protecting himself against impositions. His treatment of you is merely a superficial manifestation of the instinct for self-preservation. It indicates nothing more than that he is wary of any one who calls on him with an unknown purpose.
His object in being cold or brusque is to get rid of people who might annoy him or waste his time. He would not assume his repelling pose if he knew you had come with a purpose of true service, after full preparation of yourself and your selling plans to interest him. Though he does not realize it yet, you will neither pester him nor fritter away his precious minutes.
Therefore if your size-up convinces you that the cold, brusque manner is only assumed, you need not deal with it as if it were characteristic. It indicates no more than the habit of wariness. You should proceed confidently with your selling process, undeterred by the bearing of your prospect. Do not attempt to mollify his assumed harshness. It will take but a few moments for you to sell him the idea that you have brought him something he really needs. When he first glimpses your service purpose, his icy pose will begin to melt and his rough tones will be smoothed.
A great public-utility corporation with thousands of branch offices throughout the United States had as its purchasing agent for many years an old gorgon. He was "a holy terror" to new salesmen, but became a staunch customer when once his confidence was deservedly gained. And every employee in the office of this tartar loved him for his true kindness of heart.
You may have occasion to call on such an eccentric big man. If you are rebuffed fiercely, don't let it "get your goat." He can have no possible reason for disliking you personally, especially before he comprehends your purpose in coming to him. So disregard his ferocious pose. Though he may treat you as an unwelcome intruder, proceed calmly to the statement of your business. You know that your intention to render him a true service justifies you in taking his time. Therefore his assumed fierce manner should be powerless to disconcert you.
Do not retreat from a chosen prospective employer; do not even flinch from him, however ill-tempered and repellant he may appear. You cannot possibly lose so much by standing your ground as you would forfeit by running away from this chance to demonstrate your salesmanship. Countless thousands of men have failed because at the first sign of antagonism they surrendered even more than they might have lost if they had been utterly beaten after the hardest kind of a fight for victory. They gave up without a struggle, not only all their chances for success, but their self-respect as well.
Suppose the man you have selected as your future employer does snap at you viciously when you call on him; his ferocity signifies no more than that you must approach and handle him carefully. Your prospecting and your size-up should have convinced you that he is not in fact the crab he tries to appear. Real, thorough cranks are so rare they can be considered as non-existent. It is safe to conclude that any man who acts as if he were sore all the way through all the time is just acting. Ignore the irrascibility of the "Everett Trues" you meet. Superficial, assumed indications will not help you to comprehend the inner man you want to influence. Restrict your size-up to the signs of that inner man. While the old gorgon you face is brow-beating you, he may be planning in the back of his head an act of gentle kindness to some one. If he is habitually kind, there will be physical indications of that characteristic; in his tones and acts if not in his words. Look for these signs beneath his harsh manner, which is merely a disguise he has put on. "Everett True" behaves like a domineering tyrant, but he really is characterized by an acute sensitiveness to what is right and just.
When sizing up a man, depend principally upon details of his appearance and actions. Translate whatever you see or hear into definite discriminative judgments regarding him. His muscle structure and movements indicate certain traits. Of course you should also observe and size up the significance of the words and tones he uses. But a man employs his speech with the conscious intention of making impressions. Therefore it is not safe to rely on a size-up based on what he says. Your prospect may be using his words and tones to hide, rather than to reveal, his inner self.
However, if you know how to separate and classify details of muscle structure and action, you can depend safely on specific conclusions based on these indications. The muscle structure of a man is the result of his habits of living, or of his predominant characteristics. He builds it up unconsciously and is unable to disguise it. It can be interpreted as certain proof that he has particular traits. Most of his movements, too, are made without his realizing exactly what they denote of his character and present thoughts. He just "acts natural." Therefore if you read indications of the inner man by analytically observing his physique and actions, you will gain reliable information about him. He will not know that he is revealing his traits and what he is thinking.
From your earliest childhood to this moment you have been forming first-hand opinions of other people by observing and interpreting their words, tones, and movements. Sizing up men is not a new process to you. But in order to be a certainly successful salesman of yourself you should observe more intelligently and discriminatively hereafter. Instead of making up your mind about people without knowing just how or why you arrive at your judgments, classify your intuitions scientifically. Know the reasons for your opinions. You can be sure about the conclusions you reach as a result of your specific, exact observation of details. The study and analysis of words, tones, and acts, coupled with a little painstaking practice, will make you an expert judge of other men.
Do not seem to make an effort to observe the person you are sizing up, for that would impress him disagreeably. Without indicating that you are watching him, mentally note and interpret his muscle structure, his manner of speaking, his gestures, the rate of his physical activity, the way his actions respond to his ideas, the type and tensity of his movements. Each item you analyze and translate should indicate to you clearly some fact about the inner man.
Of course you will not be able to read your prospect thoroughly in the first few moments after you meet him. It is possible to make only a partial size-up then. No one would reveal all his characteristics in such a brief time. But each indication you perceive and interpret correctly will aid you to attribute to him certain other, related traits. For instance, if the actions of a man indicate the characteristic of evasion, you may judge safely that he lacks courage, the highest sense of honor, some of the elements of perfect squareness and trustworthiness. If he has a habit of under-estimating or "knocking," and manifests this characteristic in something he says or does, you may feel certain he is not an idealist. He is likely to be pretty "practical" in his views, and cannot be won by appeals to rosy visions.
Analysis of a man's true character usually shows that its elements are thoroughly consistent. A human being is not a bundle of contradictions, but an aggregation of likenesses. Every man differs from every other man; yet, generally speaking, one element of his character is not apt to differ radically from another detail of himself. There are exceptions, but in most cases the seeming contradictions in an individual are only apparent opposites. Supposed inconsistencies cause surprise because the true fundamental traits of the person observed are not discerned. The outer man often seems to contradict himself. But nearly always the inner man is consistent in his various characteristics. This is the reason why your size-up should be restricted to discriminative observation of indications of the ego.
Perhaps you have been thinking, "The theory seems to be all right, but exactly how is it applied?" So we shall turn our attention next to specific details of sizing up the characteristics of the inner man. We shall see just how his thoughts and feelings may be discerned at a particular time.
We assumed previously that you have called upon the man to whom you want to sell your services. You believe the way to your success lies through association with him. Your faculties of observation should be trained to size up at a glance whatever traits are suggested by his bearing, his clothes, his manner, his actions, his surroundings. Whether he is standing or sitting, it is possible for you to perceive and interpret his pose and poise. You can learn much from his walk if he steps forward to greet you. His handshake may tell volumes about his true character. The different ways that men clasp palms are especially significant of their individual traits. You should have a scientific knowledge of handshakes.
Should your prospect merely nod on your entrance, note discriminatively the movement he makes. There are many kinds of nods. The quick, sharp tipping of the head indicates unhesitating, clean-cut decisions. Such judgments on the spur of the moment are not always right, but they are apt to be pretty conclusive. Irregular, jerky nods are signs of irritability, of rash or very impulsive decisions, and often of unreasoning prejudice. The nod made directly forward signifies frankness, dignity, and straight thinking. The tilting of the head a little to one side suggests a habit of indirectness and a tendency to "stall."