casus, quos vitasset, si eum nihil fefellisset. Etsi is erat, ut ait idem, qui τὸ ἄμεινον καὶ τὸ χεῖρον ἐν τῷ ἀφανεῖ ἔτι ἑώρα μάλιστα, tamen non vidit, nec quo modo Lacedaemoniorum nec quo modo suorum civium invidiam effugeret nec quid Artaxerxi polliceretur. Non fuisset illa nox tam acerba Africano, sapientissimo viro, non tam dirus ille dies Sullanus callidissimo viro, C. Mario, si nihil utrumque eorum fefellisset. Nos tamen hoc confirmamus illo augurio, quo diximus, nec nos fallit, nec aliter accidet. Corruat iste necesse est aut per adversarios aut ipse per se, qui quidem sibi est adversarius unus acerrimus. Id spero vivis nobis fore; quamquam tempus est nos de illa perpetua iam, non de hac exigua vita cogitare. Sin quid accident maturius, haud sane mea multum interfuerit, utrum factum videam an futurum esse multo ante viderim. Quae cum ita sint, non est committendum, ut iis paream, quos contra me senatus, ne quid res publica detrimenti acciperet, armavit.
Tibi sunt omnia commendata, quae commendationis meae pro tuo in nos amore non indigent. Nec hercule ego quidem reperio, quid scribam; sedeo enim πλουδοκῶν. Etsi nihil umquam tam fuit scribendum quam nihil mihi umquam ex plurimis tuis iucunditatibus
error in his calculations. Though he was, as the same writer says, "a clear-sighted judge of the better and the worse course in a doubtful crisis,"[140] yet he failed to see how to avoid the hate of the Spartans and his own fellow-citizens, nor what promise he ought to make to Artaxerxes. Africanus would have been spared that cruel night,[141] and that master of craft C. Marius the fateful day of Sulla's triumph, if nothing had ever escaped their calculations. So I strengthen myself by that prophetic remark of Plato: I am not deceived nor will it happen otherwise. Caesar is bound to fall either through the agency of his enemies or of himself, and he is his own worst enemy. I hope it will be in our lifetime, though it is an occasion for us to consider the lasting future and not our own narrow life. If anything happens to me before that day, it will not have mattered to me much whether I see it come about or foresee that it will happen long before. Since this is so, I must not obey men against whom the Senate armed me with power to see that the Republic took no harm.[142]
[140] Thucydides i, 138.
[141] P. Scipio Africanus the younger was found dead in his bed, and was supposed to have been murdered at Carbo's instigation.
[142] Cf. Ad Fam. XVI, 11, where he states that the Senate gave a general commission to all magistrates and ex-consuls "ne quid respublica detrimenti caperet."
To you all my interests have been entrusted, though they need no entrusting considering your great affection for me. I have nothing to write, for I sit waiting to sail. Yet I never wanted so much to write anything, as I want to tell you that of your
gratius accidisse, quam quod meam Tulliam suavissime diligentissimeque coluisti. Valde eo ipsa delectata est, ego autem non minus. Cuius quidem virtus mirifica. Quo modo illa fert publicam cladem, quo modo domesticas tricas! quantus autem animus in discessu nostro! Est στοργή, est summa σύντηξις. Tamen nos recte facere et bene audire vult. Sed hac super re ne nimis, ne meam ipse συμπάθειαν iam evocem.
Tu, si quid de Hispaniis certius et si quid aliud, dum adsumus, scribes, et ego fortasse discedens dabo ad te aliquid, eo etiam magis, quod Tullia te non putabat hoc tempore ex Italia. Cum Antonio item est agendum ut cum Curione Melitae me velle esse, huic civili bello nolle interesse. Eo velim tam facili uti possim et tam bono in me quam Curione. Is ad Misenum VI Nonas venturus dicebatur, id est hodie. Sed praemisit mihi odiosas litteras hoc exemplo:
VIIIa
"ANTONIUS TRIB. PL. PRO PR. CICERONI IMP. SAL.
Nisi te valde amarem, et multo quidem plus, quam tu putas, non extimuissem rumorem, qui de te prolatus est, cum praesertim falsum esse existimarem. Sed, quia te nimio plus diligo, non possum dissimulare mihi famam quoque, quamvis sit falsa, magni esse. Te iturum esse[143] trans mare credere non possum, cum tanti facias Dolabellam et Tulliam tuam, feminam
[143] Te iturum esse added by Baiter.
many kindnesses none has given me greater pleasure than your very gracious and constant care of Tullia. She herself has been charmed and I not less. She has shown admirable qualities, has borne the national calamity and private worries with great fortitude and displayed it over my departure. She loves me and sympathizes with me and yet wishes me to act rightly and keep my good repute. But enough of this, lest I begin to pity myself.
If you get more certain tidings about Spain or any other matter, pray write and tell me while I am here, and perhaps at the time of going I may send you news, the more so because Tullia fancies that you are not leaving Italy at the present moment. I must explain to Antony as I did to Curio that I want to stay in Malta and refuse to take part in this civil war. I only hope that I may find him as easy and good to me as I found Curio. He will come it is said to Misenum on the second, that is to-day; but he has sent in advance a nasty letter of which I subjoin a copy:
VIIIa
"ANTONIUS TRIBUNE PROPRAETOR GREETING TO CICERO
IMPERATOR.
"Had I not a great affection for you, and much more than you think, I should not have been alarmed at a report which has been spread about you, especially as I thought it to be false. But, just because I like you so very much, I cannot hide from myself that the report, although it may be false, causes me great concern. That you are about to go over seas I cannot believe, when you have such dear regard for Dolabella
lectissimam, tantique ab omnibus nobis fias; quibus mehercule dignitas amplitudoque tua paene carior est quam tibi ipsi. Sed tamen non sum arbitratus esse amici non commoveri etiam improborum sermone, atque eo feci studiosius, quod iudicabam duriores partes mihi impositas esse ob offensione nostra, quac magis a ζηλοτυπίᾳ mea quam ab iniuria tua nata est. Sic enim volo te tibi persuadere, mihi neminem esse cariorem te excepto Caesare meo meque illud una indicare, Caesarem maxime in suis M. Ciceronem reponere. Quare, mi Cicero, te rogo, ut tibi omina integra serves, eius fidem improbes, qui tibi, ut beneficium daret, prius iniuriam fecit, contra ne profugias, qui te, esti non amabit, quod accidere non potest, tamen salvum amplissimumque esse cupiet.
Dedita opera ad te Calpurnium, familiarissimum meum, misi, ut mihi magnae curae tuam vitam ac dignitatem esse scires."
Eodem die a Caesare Philotimus litteras attulit hoc exemplo:
VIIIb
"CAESAR IMP. SAL. D. CICERONI IMP.
Etsi te nihil temere, nihil imprudenter facturum iudicaram, tamen permotus hominum fama scribendum ad te existimavi, et pro nostra benevolentia petendum, ne quo progredereris proclinata iam re, quo integra
and your daughter Tullia, that queen among women, and you are rated so highly by all of us, who, I dare swear, care almost more than you do for your dignity and position. However, I considered that it was no part of a friend to be unmoved even when scoundrels talked, and I have been more particular, because I thought that a harder task was laid upon me by our disagreement, which sprang more from jealousy on my part than from wrong on yours; for I want you to convince yourself that no one is dearer to me than you, except Caesar, and at the same time I am positive that Caesar reckons M. Cicero highly among his friends. So my dear Cicero I beg you not to commit yourself and not to rely on the honour of a man, who for the sake of conferring a kindness first did you a harm, and on the other hand not to flee from a man, who although he will not love you, which is out of the question, will always wish you to be safe and in high distinction.
"I have taken the trouble to send you Calpurnius, an intimate friend of mine, that you may know I am greatly concerned for your life and position."
On the same day Philotimus brought me a letter from Caesar of which this is a copy:
VIIIb
"CAESAR IMPERATOR TO CICERO IMPERATOR, GREETING.
"Although I had concluded that you would do nothing rashly or imprudently, nevertheless I have been so stirred by what people say that I thought it best to write to you and ask you in the name of our goodwill to each other not to go anywhere, now that fortune inclines my way, where you did not think it
etiam progrediendum tibi non existimasses. Namque et amicitiae graviorem iniuriam feceris et tibi minus commode consulueris, si non fortunae obsecutus videbere (omnia enim secundissima nobis, adversissima illis accidisse videntur), nec causam secutus (eadem enim tum fuit, cum ab eorum consiliis abesse iudicasti), sed meum aliquod factum condemnavisse; quo mihi gravius abs te nil accidere potest. Quod ne facias, pro iure nostrae amicitiae a te peto. Postremo quid viro bono et quieto et bono civi magis convenit quam abesse a civilibus controversiis? Quod non nulli cum probarent, periculi causa sequi non potuerunt; tu explorato et vitae meae testimonio et amicitiae iudicio neque tutius neque honestius reperies quicquam quam ab omni contentione abesse.
XV Kal. Maias ex itinere."
IX
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Adventus Philotimi (at cuius hominis, quam insulsi et quam saepe pro Pompeio mentientis!) exanimavit omnes, qui mecum erant; nam ipse obdurui. Dubitabat nostrum nemo, quin Caesar itinera repressisset—volare dicitur; Petreius cum Afranio coniunxisset se—nihil adfert eius modi. Quid quaeris? etiam illud erat persuasum, Pompeium cum magnis copiis iter in
necessary to go before anything was certain. For you will have done a serious injury to our friendship and consulted your own interest very little, if you show that you are not following fortune (for everything that has happened seems most favourable to me and most unfavourable to Pompey), nor yet following the right cause (for the cause was the same then, when you thought fit to hold aloof from it), but that you have condemned some act of mine, the greatest harm you could do me. Do not take such a step, I pray you by the right of our friendship. Finally what better befits a good and peaceful man and a loyal citizen than to keep out of civil disturbance. There are some who approved such a course, but could not follow it because of the danger. But you may examine the evidence of my life and the opinion given by my friendship[144]; you will find no safer or more honourable course than to keep quite clear of the quarrel.
[144] i.e. my decision to let you be neutral. It may, however, mean "Your conviction of my friendship."
"April 16 on the march."
IX
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
The arrival of Philotimus (what a fellow he is! how stupid! how often he lies on Pompey's behalf!) has frightened the rest of us to death. For myself I am hardened. None of us doubted that Caesar had checked Pompey's progress: Philotimus says he is simply flying. Nobody doubted that Petreius had joined Afranius: he brings no such news. In fact we have all been sure that Pompey had actually made
Germaniam per Illyricum fecisse; id enim αὐθεντικῶς nuntiabatur, Melitam igitur, opinor, capessamus, dum, quid in Hispania. Quod quidem prope modum videor ex Caesaris litteris ipsius voluntate facere posse, qui negat neque honestius neque tutius mihi quicquam esse quam ab omni contentione abesse. Dices: "Ubi ille ergo tuus animus, quem proximis litteris?" Adest et idem est; sed utinam meo solum capite decernerem! Lacrimae meorum me interdum molliunt precantium ut de Hispaniis exspectemus. M. Caeli quidem epistulam scriptam miserabiliter, cum hoc idem obsecraret, ut exspectarem, ne fortunas meas, ne unicum filium, ne meos omnes tam temere proderem non sine magno fletu legerunt pueri nostri. Etsi meus quidem est fortior, eoque ipso vehementius commovet, nec quicquam nisi de dignatione laborat.
Melitam igitur, deinde, quo videbitur. Tu tamen etiam nunc mihi aliquid litterarum, et maxime, si quid ab Afranio. Ego, si cum Antonio locutus ero, scribam ad te, quid actum sit. Ero tamen in credendo, ut mones, cautus; nam occultandi ratio cum difficilis tum etiam periculosa est. Servium exspecto ad Nonas, et adigit ita Postumia et Servius filius. Quartanam leviorem esse gaudeo. Misi ad te Caeli etiam litterarum exemplum.
IXa = ad fam. VIII 16.
CAELIUS CICERONI SAL.
Exanimatus tuis litteris, quibus te nihil nisi triste cogitare ostendisti, neque, id quid esset, perscripsisti,
his way with large forces into Germany through Illyricum, for that was the news sans doute. So I think I must make for Malta, until there is news from Spain. This from Caesar's letter I almost think I may do without annoying him, for he says there is no more honourable or safe course open to me than to keep quite clear of the fight. You will say "Where then is your courage which you showed in recent letters?" It is there and the same; but would that I had only to decide for myself. The tears of my family at times weaken me, when they beg me to wait for news about Spain. The miserable tone of M. Caelius' letter making this same request that I should wait, not to risk so rashly my fortunes, my only son and all my family, moved our boys to weeping; although my own son is made of stronger stuff, and for that very reason he affects me more deeply, thinking only of my reputation.
So I shall go to Malta, thence where it seems good. Still even now send me a line, especially if there is any news from Afranius. If I have an interview with Antony, I will inform you of the result. However, as you advise, I will take care how I trust him, for the policy of concealment is hard and dangerous too. Servius Sulpicius I await till the 7th. Both his wife Postumia and his son urge me to this. I rejoice that your ague is better. I send you also a copy of Caelius' letter.
IXa
CAELIUS TO CICERO, GREETING.
In my dismay at your letter, in which you show that your thoughts are set on some unhappy act
neque non tamen, quale esset, quod cogitates, aperuisti, has ad te ilico litteras scripsi. Per fortunas tuas, Cicero, per liberos te oro et obsecro, ne quid gravius de salute et incolumitate tua consulas. Nam deos hominesque amicitiamque nostram testificor me tibi praedixisse neque temere monuisse, sed, postquam Caesarem convenerim sententiamque eius, qualis futura esset parta victoria, cognorim, te certiorem fecisse. Si existimas eandem rationem fore Caesaris in dimittendis adversariis et condicionibus ferendis, erras; nihil nisi atrox et saevum cogitat atque etiam loquitur; iratus senatui exiit, his intercessionibus plane incitatus est; non mehercules erit deprecationi locus. Quare, si tibi tu, si filius unicus, si domus, si spes tuae reliquae tibi carae sunt, si aliquid apud te nos, si vir optimus, gener tuus, valemus, quorum fortunam non debes velle conturbare, noli committere,[145] ut eam causam, in cuius victoria salus nostra est, odisse aut relinquere cogamur, aut impiam cupiditatem contra salutem tuam habeamus. Denique illud cogita, quod offensae fuerit in ista cunctatione, te subisse. Nunc te contra victorem Caesarem facere, quem dubiis rebus laedere noluisti, et ad eos fugatos accedere, quos resistentes sequi nolueris, summae stultitiae est. Vide, ne, dum pudet te parum optimatem esse, parum diligenter, quid optimum sit, eligas. Quod si totum tibi persuadere non possum, saltem, dum, quid de Hispaniis agamus, scitur,
[145] noli committere added by Lehmann.
without saying exactly what it is, though you disclose sufficiently what kind of an act it is, I write this on the spot. In the name of your fortunes and your children, I beg and beseech you, Cicero, not to take any step that may endanger your life and safety. For I call gods and men and our friendship to witness that I told you before, and that it was no casual warning that I gave you, but certain information, after I had met Caesar and found out what his view would be, if he won the victory. If you imagine that he will maintain his present policy of letting his adversaries go and making peace, you are mistaken; he is meditating and even proclaiming nothing but cruelty and severity. He left Rome in anger with the Senate: these recent vetoes have clearly provoked him: you may take my word for it there will be no chance of begging off. Then, if you have any care for yourself, your only son, your house and what hopes you have left, if I and your excellent son-in-law have any influence with you—and you ought not to wish to spoil our fortunes—then do not compel us to hate or relinquish a cause, in whose victory our safety lies, or to harbour unnatural wishes for your destruction. Finally consider this: any offence there may have been in your hesitation, you have already given. Now it is the height of folly to side against Caesar in his hour of victory, when you refused to attack him while his fortunes were doubtful; and to join in the flight of those, whom you would not follow when they stood their ground. Beware lest for fear of showing too little zeal for the "better party," you use too little care in choosing the better course. But, if I cannot persuade you entirely, at least wait till it is known how we get on in Spain,
exspecta; quas tibi nuntio adventu Caesaris fore nostras. Quam isti spem habeant amissis Hispaniis, nescio; quod porro tuum consilium sit ad desperatos accedere, non medius fidius reperio.
Hoc, quod tu non dicendo mihi significasti, Caesar audierat, ac, simul atque "have" mihi dixit, statim, quid de te audisset, exposuit. Negavi me scire, sed tamen ab eo petivi, ut ad te litteras mitteret, quibus maxime ad remanendum commoveri posses. Me secum in Hispaniam ducit. Nam, nisi ita faceret, ego, priusquam ad urbem accederem, ubicumque esses, ad te percucurrissem, et hoc a te praesens contendissem atque omni vi te retinuissem. Etiam atque etiam, Cicero, cogita, ne te tuosque omnis funditus evertas, ne te sciens prudensque eo demittas, unde exitum vides nullum esse. Quodsi te aut voces optimatium commovent, aut non nullorum hominum insolentiam et iactationem ferre non potes, eligas censeo aliquod oppidum vacuum a bello, dum haec decernuntur; quae iam erunt confecta. Id si feceris, et ego te sapienter fecisse iudicabo, et Caesarem non offendes.
X
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Me caecum, qui haec ante non viderim! Misi ad te epistulam Antoni. Ei cum ego saepissime scripsissem nihil me contra Caesaris rationes cogitare, meminisse me generi mei, meminisse amicitiae, potuisse,
which I assure you will be ours as soon as Caesar arrives. What your friends' hopes are, when they have lost Spain, is more than I know; and what your idea is in joining them, when they have no hopes, is more than I can imagine.
What you hinted at without speaking plainly, Caesar had heard, and as soon as ever he had said "good day," he told me what he had heard about you. I said I knew nothing about it: but I asked him to send you a letter as the best means of inducing you to stay. He is taking me with him to Spain. If he were not, I should have hurried to you, before going to Rome, wherever you might have been, and should have pressed this view on you personally and done all in my power to restrain you. Once more and yet once more, Cicero, think before you utterly destroy yourself and all your family: do not wittingly and with your eyes open put yourself in a position from which you see there is no escape. But, if you are moved by the call of the conservative party, or if you cannot endure the insolence and arrogant behaviour of certain persons, I think you should choose some town remote from the war, until the matter is settled: and settled it will be at once. If you do that, I shall consider you have acted wisely, and Caesar will not be offended.
X
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
How blind I am not to have foreseen it! I send you Antony's letter. I have often written to him that I planned nothing against Caesar's policy, that I was mindful of my son-in-law, of our friendship,
si aliter sentirem, esse cum Pompeio; me autem, quia cum lictoribus invitus cursarem, abesse velle, nec id ipsum certum etiam nunc habere, vide, quam ad haec παραινετικῶς:
"Tuum consilium quam verum est. Nam, qui se medium esse vult, in patria manet, qui proficiscitur, aliquid de altera utra parte iudicare videtur. Sed ego is non sum, qui statuere debeam, iure quis proficiscatur necne; partes mihi Caesar has imposuit, ne quem omnino discedere ex Italia paterer. Quare parvi refert me probare cogitationem tuam, si nihil tamen tibi remittere possum. Ad Caesarem mittas censeo et ab eo hoc petas. Non dubito, quin impetraturus sis, cum praesertim te amicitiae nostrae rationem habiturum esse pollicearis."
Habes σκυτάλην Λακωνικήν. Omnino excipiam hominem. Erat autem v Nonas venturus vesperi, id est hodie. Cras igitur ad me fortasse veniet. Temptabo, audiam: nihil properare; missurum ad Caesarem. Clam agam, cum paucissimis alicubi occultabor, certe hinc istis invitissimis evolabo, atque utinam ad Curionem! Σύνες ὅ τοι λέγω. Magnus dolor accessit. Efficietur aliquid dignum nobis.
Δυσουρία tua mihi valde molesta. Medere, amabo,
that, if I had thought otherwise, I could have been with Pompey, that I wished to leave Italy because I was loth to wander about with my lictors, though I had not made up my mind definitely even to that. See in what an ex cathedra tone he answers me:—"Your policy is quite right. For a man who wishes to be neutral remains in his country; the man who leaves his country seems to express his conviction on one side or the other; but it is not for me to determine, whether anyone has the right to leave or not. The part Caesar has given me is not to let anyone at all leave Italy; so it is of little use for me to approve your plan, if all the same I cannot make an exception for you. I think you should send to Caesar and ask him this favour. I have no doubt that you will succeed, especially as you promise not to forget our friendship."
That is a laconic epistle.[146] I will certainly take my cue from the man. He is to come on the evening of the 3rd, that is to-day. To-morrow therefore he will perhaps come to me. I will sound him: I will hear him: say I am in no hurry: that I will send to Caesar. I will act secretly, with a very few attendants I will lie hidden somewhere; but assuredly, however unwilling these people are, I will fly off; and would that it may be to Curio! "Mark what I say."[147] Another great grief has come upon me. I will do something worthy of my reputation.
[146] Lit. "Laconian staff." Spartan dispatches were wound round a staff in such a way that they could not be read when taken off it. Here, however, Cicero only refers to their brevity.
[147] Probably a quotation from Pindar, Frag. 105.
Your malady gives me grave anxiety. I pray you
dum est ἀρχή. De Massiliensibus gratae tuae mihi litterae. Quaeso, ut sciam, quicquid audieris. Ocellam cuperem, si possem palam, quod a Curione effeceram, Hic ego Servium exspecto; rogor enim ab eius uxore et filio, et puto opus esse. Hic tamen Cytherida secum lectica aperta portat, alteram uxorem. Septem praeterea coniunctae lecticae amicarum sunt an amicorum. Vide, quam turpi leto pereamus, et dubita, si potes, quin ille, seu victus seu victor redierit, caedem facturus sit. Ego vero vel luntriculo, si navis non erit, eripiam me ex istorum parricidio. Sed plura scribam, cum illum convenero.
Iuvenem nostrum non possum non amare, sed ab eo nos non amari plane intellego. Nihil ego vidi tam ἀνηθοποίητον, tam aversum a suis, tam nescio quid cogitans. O vim incredibilem molestiarum! Sed erit curae, et est, ut regatur. Mirum est enim ingenium, ἤθους ἐπιμελητέον.
XI
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Obsignata iam epistula superiore, non placuit ei dari, cui constitueram, quod erat alienus. Itaque eo die data non est. Interim venit Philotimus et mihi
get medical advice in its initial stage. Your letter about the Massilians[148] pleased me. Let me know whatever you hear. I should have liked to have Ocella, if it could be done openly, and I had got Curio to allow it. Here I am awaiting Servius Sulpicius, for it is at the request of his wife and son, and I think it is necessary. Antony carries about Cytheris[149] with him in an open litter as his second wife, and besides he had seven other litters of friends male or female. See what a disgraceful death we die, and doubt, if you can, that, whether Caesar returns victor or vanquished, he will perpetrate a massacre. Even in an open boat, if I cannot get a vessel, I will tear myself away from these parricides and their doings. But I will write more when I have met him.
[148] They had shut their gates to Caesar and were being besieged.
[149] An actress.
My nephew I cannot but love, though I see clearly that he has no affection for me. I never saw anyone so unprincipled, so averse to his own relations, with such mysterious plans. What a weight of anxiety! But it will be my business, as it is now, to discipline him: he has wonderful ability, but his character requires training.
XI
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
After sealing my former letter, I did not feel inclined to hand it to the person that I had intended, as he was a stranger; so it was not despatched on that day. Meantime Philotimus came and gave me
a te litteras reddidit. Quibus quae de fratre meo scribis, sunt ea quidem parum firma, se habent nihil ὕπουλον, nihil fallax, nihil non flexibile ad bonitatem, nihil, quod non, quo velis, uno sermone possis perducere; ne multa, omnes suos, etiam quibus irascitur crebrius, tamen caros habet, me quidem se ipso cariorem. Quod de puero aliter ad te scripsit et ad matrem de filo, non reprehendo. De itinere[150] et de sorore quae scribis, molesta sunt, eoque magis, quod ea tempora nostra sunt, ut ego iis mederi non possim. Nam certe mederer; sed, quibus in malis et qua in desperatione rerum simus, vides.
[150] itinere most editors: itine MZ: Quinto Tyrrell.
Illa de ratione nummaria non sunt eius modi (saepe enim audio ex ipso), ut non cupiat tibi praestare et in eo laboret. Sed, si mihi Q. Axius in hac mea fuga HS XIII non reddit, quae dedi eius filio mutua, et utitur excusatione temporis, si Lepta, si ceteri, soleo mirari, de nescio quis HS XX cum audio ex illo se urgeri. Vides enim profecto angustias. Curari tamen ea tibi utique iubet. An existimas illum in isto genere lentulum aut restrictum? Nemo est minus. De fratre satis.
De eius iuvene filio, indulsit illi quidem suus pater semper, sed non facit indulgentia mendacem aut avarum aut non amantem suorum, ferocem fortasse atque arrogantem et infestum facit. Itaque habet haec quoque, quae nascuntur ex indulgentia, sed ea sunt tolerabilia (quid enim dicam?) hac inventute; ea vero,
a letter from you. The conduct of my brother about which you write shows little firmness, but no chicanery, no treachery, nothing inflexibly opposed to goodness, nothing that cannot be turned where you will by a single conversation. In short all his relations, even those with whom he is so often angry, are nevertheless dear to him, and I to be sure am dearer than life. I do not blame him for writing in one strain about his boy to you and in another to the boy's mother. I am distressed by what you say about the journey and your sister, and the more so because the times are such that I cannot remedy the matter. For certainly I would have done so: but you see in what trouble I am, what desperation.
As for his financial affairs, I often hear from him, and they are not in such a state as to prevent him from being anxious to pay you and from making efforts to that end: but if Q. Axius does not pay me in this my flight the £100 I lent his son, and pleads in excuse the state of the times, and if Lepta and others do the same, I confess I am always surprised to hear from Quintus that he is pressed for some £175. For of course you see his straits. However he has ordered the sum to be paid to your account. Perhaps you suppose that he is slow or close-fisted in money matters. No one is less so: but enough about my brother.
As for his son, the father has certainly always indulged him; but indulgence does not make him a liar or a miser or disloyal to his friends, though it does perhaps make him surly, haughty and aggressive. Accordingly he has these defects which are due to spoiling; but they are not intolerable, shall I say, as young men go nowadays. But the defects which, to
quae mihi quidem, qui illum amo, sunt his ipsis malis, in quis sumus, miseriora, non sunt ab obsequio nostro. Nam suas radices habent; quas tamen evellerem profecto, si liceret. Sed ea tempora sunt, ut omnia mihi sint patienda. Ego meum facile teneo; nihil est enim eo tractabilius. Cuius quidem misericordia languidiora adhuc consilia cepi, et, quo ille me certiorem vult esse, eo magis timeo, ne in eum exsistam crudelior.
Sed Antonius venit heri vesperi. Iam fortasse ad me veniet, aut ne id quidem, quoniam scripsit, quid fieri vellet. Sed scies continuo, quid actum sit. Nos iam nihil nisi occulte.
De pueris quid agam? parvone navigio committam? Quid mihi animi in navigando censes fore? Recordor enim, aestate cum illis illo Rhodiorum ἀφράκτῳ navigans quam fuerim sollicitus; quid duro tempore anni actuariola fore censes? O rem undique miseram!
Trebatius erat mecum, vir plane et civis bonus. Quae ille monstra, di immortales! Etiamne Balbus in senatum venire cogitet? Sed ei ipsi cras ad te litteras dabo. Vettienum mihi amicum, ut scribis, ita puto esse. Cum eo, quod ἀποτόμως ad me scripserat de nummis curandis, θυμικώτερον eram iocatus. Id tu, si ille aliter acceperit ac debuit, lenies. "Monetali" autem adscripsi, quod ille ad me "PRO COS." Sed, quoniam est homo et nos diligit, ipse quoque a nobis diligatur. Vale.
me at any rate who love him, are more distressing than even the evils on which we have fallen, do not proceed from any indulgence of mine; for they are deep rooted: but I would have rooted them up, had I been allowed. But the times are such that I must bear everything. My own son I control easily. He is quite tractable. My own policy has lacked vigour owing to my pity for him; and the more he wants me to be unflinching, the more I fear I may prove cruel to him.
Well Antony came yesterday evening; soon perhaps he will visit me, perhaps not even that, as he has written what he wanted done; but you shall know forthwith what has happened. All I do now is done secretly.
What shall I do about the boys? Shall I entrust them to a small boat? What courage do you suppose I shall have on the voyage? For I remember sailing in the summer in an open Rhodian boat with them and how anxious I was; and how do you suppose it will be in the bad season in a tiny pinnace? Misery everywhere!
Trebatius is with me, a real man and a loyal citizen. Ye gods, what awful news he brings! So even Balbus is thinking of attending the Senate! But I will give Trebatius himself a letter for you to-morrow. I agree with your letter that Vettienus is friendly to me. But I made a rather bitter jest at his expense, because he wrote curtly to me about paying my debt. Appease him, if he took it in bad part. I addressed him by his title "commissioner of the mint" because he addressed me as "proconsul." But since he is a good man and has affection for me, let me keep my affection for him. Farewell.
XII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Quidnam mihi futurum est, aut quis me non solum infelicior, sed iam etiam turpior? Nominatim de me sibi imperatum dicit Antonius, nec me tamen ipse adhuc viderat, sed hoc Trebatio narravit. Quid agam nunc, cui nihil procedit, caduntque ea, quae diligentissime sunt cogitata, taeterrime? Ego enim Curionem nactus omnia me consecutum putavi. Is de me ad Hortensium scripserat. Reginus erat totus noster. Huic nihil suspicabamur cum hoc mari negotii fore. Quo me nunc vertam? Undique custodior. Sed satis lacrimis. Παρακλεπτέον igitur et occulte in aliquam onerariam corrependum, non committendum, ut etiam compacto prohibiti videamur. Sicilia petenda. Quam si erimus nacti, maiora quaedam consequemur. Sit modo recte in Hispaniis! Quamquam de ipsa Sicilia utinam sit verum! Sed adhuc nihil secundi. Concursus Siculorum ad Catonem dicitur factus, orasse, ut resisteret, omnia pollicitos; commotum illum dilectum habere coepisse. Non credo, ut est luculentus auctor. Potuisse certe teneri illam provinciam scio. Ab Hispaniis autem iam audietur.
Hic nos C. Marcellum habemus, eadem vere cogitantem aut bene simulantem; quamquam ipsum non videram, sed ex familiarissimo eius audiebam. Tu, quaeso, si quid habebis novi; ego, si quid moliti erimus, ad te statim scribam. Quintum filium severius
XII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
What is to happen to me? Who is there more ill-starred, or even more humiliated? Antony says he has received orders about me definitely. Yet I have not seen him myself so far; but he told Trebatius. What can I do now? Nothing succeeds and all my best laid plans fail abominably. For, when I had won over Curio, I imagined I had attained my end. He had written about me to Hortensius. Reginus was wholly my friend. I never suspected that Antony had anything to do with this part of the sea. Whither can I turn now? Everywhere I am watched. But enough of lamentation. I must steal away and creep privily into some cargo boat; I must not allow it to appear that I connive at being hindered. I must go to Sicily. If I once get there, I shall have greater ends in view. If only all goes well in Spain! However, I do hope the news about Sicily may prove true! Hitherto I have had no luck. It is said the Sicilians have gathered round Cato, prayed him to resist and promised every support: and that he has been induced to begin making a levy. I don't believe it, good as the authority is. I know for a fact that that province could have been held. But we shall soon hear from Spain.
Here I have C. Marcellus, who holds the same views as myself or makes a good pretence of doing so. I have not indeed met him myself; but I hear it from one of his most intimate friends. Write to me, if you have any news. If I attempt anything, I shall inform you at once. Young Quintus I shall handle
adhibebo. Utinam proficere possim! Tu tamen eas epistulas, quibus asperius de eo scripsi, aliquando concerpito, ne quando quid emanet; ego item tuas. Servium exspecto, nec ab eo quicquam ὑγιές. Scies, quicquid erit.
XIIa
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Sine dubio errasse nos confitendum est. "At semel, at una in re." Immo omnia quo diligentius cogitata eo facta sunt imprudentius.
Ἀλλὰ τὰ μὲν προτετύχθαι ἐάσομεν ἀχνύμενοί περ, in reliquis modo ne ruamus. Iubes de profectione me providere. Quid provideam? Ita patent omnia, quae accidere possunt, ut, ea si vitem, sedendum sit cum dedecore et dolore, si neglegam, periculum sit, ne in manus incidam perditorum. Sed vide, quantis in miseriis simus. Optandum interdum videtur, ut aliquam accipiamus ab istis quamvis acerbam iniuriam, ut tyranno in odio fuisse videamur. Quodsi nobis is cursus, quem speraram, pateret, effecissem aliquid profecto, ut tu optas et hortaris, dignum nostra mora. Sed mirificae sunt custodiae, et quidem ille ipse Curio suspectus. Quare vi aut clam agendum est et, si vi, fortiter cum tempestate.[151] Clam autem istis? In quo si quod σφάλμα, vides, quam turpe sit. Trahimur, nec fugiendum, si quid violentius.
[151] et si vi forte ne cum pestate M: et si vi forte et cum tempestate Ant., F. I have adopted Orelli's reading; but it is very uncertain.
with severity. I hope my efforts may succeed. But please some time tear up the letters in which I criticize him severely, for fear anything ever come to light. I will tear up yours. Servius Sulpicius I am still awaiting, nor do I hear anything satisfactory from him. You shall know whatever happens.
XIIa
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Undoubtedly I must admit I have been mistaken. But is it once only or on one topic? No, in everything. The more carefully I have thought, the less wisely have I done. "Let bygones be bygones."[152] In the future only let us not invite disaster. You bid me provide for my journey. What can I provide? All the possible accidents are so obvious, that, if I would shun them, I must sit still in shame and grief: and, if I disregard them, it is odds that I fall into the hands of villains. But see how miserable I am. Sometimes it seems preferable that I should receive some damage however bitter from Caesar's party, that people may see I am hated by the tyrant. But, if the voyage for which I hoped were open to me, certainly, as you wish and advise, I should have done something to justify delay. But I am watched with extraordinary care and even Curio is suspect. So I must make a bold move or use craft. If a bold move, I need good weather: but, if craft, should there be any faux pas, you see how disgraced I should be. I am carried away by circumstances and must not be afraid of a bold course.
[152] Iliad xvii, 112, "But what is past though grieved we will let be."
De Caelio saepe mecum agito nec, si quid habuero tale, dimittam. Hispanias spero firmas esse. Massiliensium factum cum ipsum per se luculentum est, tum mihi argumento est recte esse in Hispaniis. Minus enim auderent, si aliter esset, et scirent; nam et vicini et diligentes sunt. Odium autem recte animadvertis significatum in theatro. Legiones etiam has, quas in Italia assumpsit, alienissimas esse video. Sed tamen nihil inimicius quam sibi ipse. Illud recte times, ne ruat. Si desperarit, certe ruet. Quo magis efficiendum aliquid est, fortuna velim meliore, animo Caeliano. Sed primum quidque. Quod qualecumque erit, continuo scies. Nos iuveni, ut rogas, suppeditabimus et Peloponnesum ipsam sustinebimus. Est enim indoles, modo aliquod hoc sit ἦθος ΑΚΙΜΟΑΟΝ.[153] Quod si adhuc nullum est, esse tamen potest, aut ἀρετὴ non est διδακτόν, quod mihi persuaderi non potest.
[153] The text here is corrupt and no convincing emendation has been suggested.
XIII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Epistula tua gratissima fuit meae Tulliae et me hercule mihi. Semper speculam aliquam adferunt tuae litterae. Scribes igitur, ac, si quid ad spem poteris, ne dimiseris. Tu Antoni leones pertimescas cave. Nihil est illo homine iucundius. Attende πρᾶξιν πολιτικοῦ.
I often reflect about Caelius; and if I have such an opportunity, I will not let it go. I hope Spain is safe. The action of the Massilians is praiseworthy in itself, and is a proof to me that things are going well in Spain. They would have been less bold, if it were otherwise, and they should know, for they live near and are watchful. You are right to remark the expression of popular feeling in the theatre. Even the legions which Caesar got in Italy seem to me to be very disloyal to him. However he is his own worst enemy. You are right to fear that he may run amuck. Assuredly he will, if he loses hope. That is all the more inducement for me to do something in the spirit of Caelius, and I hope with better luck. But everything in due course; and, whatever it be, I will inform you forthwith. I will do all for young Quintus that is necessary, and will undertake the task not only of Arcadia but of the whole Peloponnese.[154] He is able, if only he had character. However, if he has none so far, he may get it, or virtue is not teachable, and that I can never believe.
[154] Cf. x, 5.
XIII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Your letter was very pleasing to my daughter and of course to me, for your correspondence always brings a gleam of hope. So please write, and, if you can be hopeful, don't fail to be so. Don't be too much afraid of Antony's lions.[155] He is a jovial fellow. Just hear
[155] Plutarch and Pliny state that after Pharsalia Antony had a chariot drawn by lions: but from this passage it appears that the story was current earlier.