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Circular Saws

Chapter 40: XXXIX ONCE BITTEN, TWICE SHY
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About This Book

The collection gathers dozens of short, humorous sketches that playfully invert familiar proverbs and aphorisms. Each piece recasts folklore motifs, classical or biblical allusions, and contemporary social scenes into ironic parables, juxtaposing fairy-tale logic with modern bureaucratic and domestic absurdities. Tone ranges from whimsical to sardonic, with concise narratives and punchline resolutions that expose human vanity, hypocrisy and the gap between sayings and reality. Many entries are brief fables or epigrams, organized under proverb-like headings that signal the theme of each vignette.

XXXIX
ONCE BITTEN, TWICE SHY

WHEN the Last Trumpet had cleared men off the earth like crumbs off a cloth, an unbelievable sweetness and freedom settled over the world. Presently all that man had spoiled was healed, and earth was a garden and God took his pleasure walking in it.

There’s a gold apple tree grows in the garden, and if God is so minded of all other trees he plucks the fruit, but at this he holds his hand and muses. The green serpent fawns about his feet. “If thou art God indeed,” he whispers, “eat.” But God bends and strokes the glittering coils.

“Do thou eat, belovéd,” says he, “and be even as I am, having knowledge of good and evil—and of thyself.” “Get thou behind me, God,” cries the serpent, and is fled through the dust of the garden like a green flame. And when the sweet laughter of God is over, all is quiet in the garden.