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Civil service jingles and other things

Chapter 38: A DELUSION
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About This Book

A series of witty poems, parables, and light verses lampooning bureaucratic life and public service. Short jingles and longer allegorical sketches caricature clerical drudgery, patronage, political opportunism, and office rivalries, often using mock‑biblical cadence, puns, and comic exaggeration. Narratives follow minor officials navigating promotions, investigations, and changing regimes, while satirical vignettes highlight hypocrisy and the survival tactics of lower‑rank employees. The collection alternates playful rhyme and humorous prose to entertain readers acquainted with administrative routines.

A DELUSION

If you’re sick and tired of life
And the wear of business strife,
And decide to take the veil,
To a Minister you tell,
Whom you know very well,
Your long and sad, sad tale.
When he grabs you by the hand
And says in manner bland:
“You can certainly count on me
When we have a vacancee,
As sure as sure can be;
You’ll get the tip
On the strict Q.T.”
If to yourself you say,
As you go your hopeful way:
“I certainly get a Government job
At a decent salaree.”
What a singularly deluded jay
You certainly will be.
If you’re up to all the tricks
Of the game of politics,
And know a few M.P.’s;
You would naturally think
That as easy as a wink
You’d get nearly what you please;
But you’d be singularly lacking
In the necessary backing
If this was all you had,
And you looked for an appointment
You would suffer disappointment
In a manner very sad.
You see it’s just this way:
You can say just what you may,
But Political Pull is a very funny thing.
It’s as strange as strange can be.
If you’re doubtful of the fact,
Just go against the Act
To get a Civil Service sit and see.

Conventionality counteth not high in the game, but it counteth.