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Colonial facts and fictions: Humorous sketches cover

Colonial facts and fictions: Humorous sketches

Chapter 24: THE COLD LAKES.
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About This Book

A collection of short, often satirical sketches and travel anecdotes about colonial life in Australia and New Zealand. The writer blends humorous observation and local anecdote with mild social critique, targeting quarantine rules, civic pretensions, hospitality rituals, and settler enthusiasms. Vivid descriptions of ports, outback towns, flora and fauna, and encounters with Indigenous communities and immigrant labor illustrate daily routines and oddities, while episodes ranging from hotel scenes and sporting pastimes to geothermal tours and frontier legends emphasize the gap between polished fact and imaginative storytelling.

THE COLD LAKES.

1. By the medium of mere words it is impossible to convey an adequate idea of the grandeur—the surpassing loveliness we may say—of the enchanting and ravishing beauty of the Cold Lakes of the Southern Island. (Don’t bathe unless you can swim.)

2. When a stranger stands for the first time in the land of the mountain and flood—the home of the ice-king—all of which are within easy reach of the Cold Lakes, he is struck dumb with admiration.

3. The barren desolate grandeur of the haggard jagged pinnacles, which fringe the shore of the Cold Lakes, surpass the wildest flights of the Eastern imagination.

The everlasting snows, the culminating peaks, the primeval forests, hold him spell-bound with enchantment.

4. Lakes of enormous depth, and pinnacles of enormous height, are creations of Nature, the memory of which will never be obliterated from the feeblest mind.

5. Oh! crashing thunder, which reverberates from crag to crag. Oh! avalanches that hurtle in the air! Oh! light of laughing flowers; what are you to the Cold Lakes of New Zealand? (A small avalanche costs 2s. 6d. A large one 5s. The visitor ought to secure an example of this remarkable lusus naturæ. They make an effective addition to an ordinary rockery.) A township that has been squashed flat by an avalanche has a peculiar appearance.

Tableau: What revelations of beauty!