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Evening Dress / Farce

Chapter 11: THE END
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About This Book

A brief domestic farce depicts a fatigued husband who has just returned from travel and is urged by his energetic wife to attend a formal musicale to placate an exacting hostess. The couple's anxious preparations, comic misunderstandings about evening dress and etiquette, and the arrival of friends generate rapid-fire exchanges that expose social pretensions, marital negotiation, and the absurdities of polite obligation. The play unfolds through brisk dialogue and situational humor until a practical compromise resolves the evening's tensions.

"THAT LITTLE SUPPER"

Mrs. Roberts: "And so?"

Mrs. Campbell: "So?"

Bella: "I know you like to have me always speak the truth, and so I do, to you, ma'am, and every lady I ever lived with; but I wasn't going to have that young waitress of Mrs. Baker's and that nasty cook of Mrs. Merrick's laughing at us."

Campbell: "Well, and what did you do?"

Mrs. Roberts: "Yes, Bella!"

Bella: "I told Mrs. Merrick's cook that the gentlemen were getting up some charades; and I told Mr. Baker's second girl that the tailor hadn't sent Mr. Roberts's coat home."

Mrs. Campbell: "Well, you were inspired, Bella."

Mrs. Roberts, to Bella: "Oh, you—angel!"

Campbell: "Well, that isn't quite what they call the father of them. Who was the father of what? But we won't dispute about terms. The great thing now is to get at that little supper. Come on, Roberts!"

Mrs. Roberts: "Yes, Edward, take out Amy—"

Roberts, putting himself in evidence: "But don't you see, my dear, I can't draw a full breath now; and if I were to eat anything—"

Mrs. Roberts: "Oh, well, go and change them at once. We won't wait for you, dear, but I'll see to keeping it hot for you."

Campbell, as he follows the ladies out of one door, while Roberts vanishes into his dressing-room through the other; "Yes, just slip on anything that will fit you. It's so near morning now that we won't insist on evening dress."

THE END