Ever Heard This? Over Three Hundred Good Stories

Chapter 21: THE UNWELCOME GUEST

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About This Book

This collection assembles more than three hundred brief anecdotes, jokes, and epigrams that depend on wordplay, situational irony, and everyday foibles. Each item appears as a short titled vignette, ranging from single-line quips to slightly longer comic sketches touching on family life, clergy, lawyers, regional manners, and social customs. The tone moves between gentle satire and absurdity, using concise setups and swift retorts to highlight human vanity, misunderstanding, and hypocrisy. Entries are grouped for easy dipping and light amusement, offering quick observations and humorous reversals rather than extended narrative development.

THE UNWELCOME GUEST

A man who was fond of visiting his friends and outstaying his welcome had been cordially received by a Quaker who treated him with attention and politeness for some days. At last his host said, "My friend, I am afraid thee wilt never visit me again." "Oh, yes, I shall," he replied. "I have enjoyed my visit very much; I will certainly come again." "Nay," said the Quaker, "I think thee wilt not visit me again." "What makes you think I shall not come again?" asked the visitor. "If thee does never leave," said the Quaker, "how canst thee come again?"