Ever Heard This? Over Three Hundred Good Stories

Chapter 289: NOT TO BE BEATEN

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About This Book

This collection assembles more than three hundred brief anecdotes, jokes, and epigrams that depend on wordplay, situational irony, and everyday foibles. Each item appears as a short titled vignette, ranging from single-line quips to slightly longer comic sketches touching on family life, clergy, lawyers, regional manners, and social customs. The tone moves between gentle satire and absurdity, using concise setups and swift retorts to highlight human vanity, misunderstanding, and hypocrisy. Entries are grouped for easy dipping and light amusement, offering quick observations and humorous reversals rather than extended narrative development.

NOT TO BE BEATEN

A Highlander who prided himself on being able to play any tune on the pipes perched himself on the side of one of his native hills one Sunday morning and commenced blowing for all he was worth.

Presently the minister came along and, going up to MacDougall with the intention of severely reprimanding him, asked in a very harsh voice, "MacDougall, do you know the Ten Commandments?"

MacDougall scratched his chin for a moment and then, in an equally harsh voice, said:

"D'ye think you've beat me? Just whistle the first three or four bars, and I'll hae a try at it."