Ever Heard This? Over Three Hundred Good Stories

Chapter 5: SWEET ARE THE USES OF ADVERTISEMENT

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About This Book

This collection assembles more than three hundred brief anecdotes, jokes, and epigrams that depend on wordplay, situational irony, and everyday foibles. Each item appears as a short titled vignette, ranging from single-line quips to slightly longer comic sketches touching on family life, clergy, lawyers, regional manners, and social customs. The tone moves between gentle satire and absurdity, using concise setups and swift retorts to highlight human vanity, misunderstanding, and hypocrisy. Entries are grouped for easy dipping and light amusement, offering quick observations and humorous reversals rather than extended narrative development.

SWEET ARE THE USES OF ADVERTISEMENT

A Scot and a minister were in a train together travelling through a lovely part of Scotland.

Beautiful scenery--mountains, dales, rivers, and all the glories of Nature. When passing a grand mountain they saw a huge advertisement for So-and-So's whisky.

The Scot gave a snort of disgust. The minister leant forward and said, "I'm glad to see, sir, that you agree with me, that they should not be allowed to desecrate the beauties of Nature by advertisement."

"It's no' that, sir," said the Scot bitterly, "it's rotten whusky."