How to Teach Manners
in the school-room.

By MRS. JULIA M. DEWEY,

Method and Critic Teacher in the Public Schools of Rutland, Vt.;
formerly Supt. of Schools, Hoosic Falls, N. Y.

THE A. S. BARNES COMPANY
New York and Chicago

COPYRIGHT, 1888
E. L. KELLOGG & CO.
NEW YORK

INTRODUCTION.

Importance of the definite teaching of manners. Children are close imitators; they will learn some kind of manners, and one who teaches positively or emphatically (or contrariwise) may often see a miniature of himself in his young pupil. With this truth in mind one can hardly attach too much importance to punctilious politeness on the teacher’s part in his intercourse with pupils. But however polite a teacher may be, the informal or unconscious teaching of manners is not enough. The school-room does not afford opportunity to exemplify all the necessary practices in good manners, and there is no other way but to teach the various requirements of an accepted code with reference to actual examples that may present themselves at any time in life.

It is to be remembered that many children have no opportunity of obtaining a knowledge of good manners, either by practice or precept, except as it is afforded by the schools. And as habits formed in childhood are the most enduring, a lack of early training in good manners will show itself as long as life lasts. Many other reasons weigh in favor of the definite teaching of manners, one of which is, if courtesy is demanded of pupils.

The underlying principles of courtesy should be inculcated, that children may know it is more than an empty show.

Children need to learn the definite language courtesy employs. This to many children is a new language, and can only be accomplished by definite teaching. Beside, if manners are considered of sufficient importance to be counted a regular part of the school, they will attract much more importance. Accompanying this by observance on the part of teacher, the pupil acquires a valuable knowledge.

Good manners ever prove an invaluable aid in doing away with many of the unpleasantnesses of school-life. Courtesy of manner under all circumstances means great self-control, and a lack of self-control in teacher or pupil is the origin of most misdemeanors in school. Aside from the benefits to be derived in the school-room, gentle manners help one on in the world wonderfully. They are more powerful in many cases than their other knowledge. “All doors fly open to the one who possesses them.”

“Manners are the shadows of great virtues.”—Whately. “High thoughts seated in a heart of courtesy.”—Sir Philip Sidney. Mr. Calvert says: “A gentleman is never unduly familiar; takes no liberties; is chary of questions; is neither artificial nor affected; is as little obtrusive upon the mind or feelings of others as on their persons; bears himself tenderly toward the weak and unprotected; is not arrogant; cannot be supercilious; can be self-denying without struggle; is not vain of his advantages; habitually subordinates his lower to his higher self; is, in his best condition, electric with truth, buoyant with veracity.”

In a right conception of good breeding the moral element predominates. With this idea in view, no one should attempt to instruct in good manners who has not the ability to instil into the minds of children its fundamental principles. True courtesy implies strict honor, self-possession, forbearance, generous and refined feeling, all culminating in a polished deportment.

When teachers consider manners in this high sense, and teach them accordingly, they give their pupils that which will bring them much more happiness in life than any amount of knowledge teaching without it.

AIM OF THIS WORK.

1. To furnish material for lessons in manners suitable to be taught in the schools, and adapted to different grades of pupils.

2. To furnish illustrative lessons showing the main lines of thought to be pursued, the length of the lesson, and the simplicity of method to be employed.

3. To impress both teachers and pupils with a need of the knowledge of good manners.

“A gentleman can have no better watchword than that sung at Bethlehem: ‘Peace on earth, good will to men.’

CONTENTS.