THE PIRATES OF PENZANCE;
OR,
THE SLAVE OF DUTY.
ACT I.
Scene.—A rocky sea-shore on the coast of Cornwall. Under the rock is a cavern. In the distance is a calm sea, on which a schooner is lying at anchor. As the curtain rises groups of Pirates are discovered—some drinking, some playing cards. Samuel, the pirate lieutenant, is going from one group to the other, filling the cups from a flask. Frederic is seated in a despondent attitude at the back of the scene. Ruth kneels at his feet.
Opening Chorus.
[Frederic rises and comes forward with Pirate King.
King. Yes, Frederic, from to-day you rank as a full-blown member of our band.
All. Hurrah!
Fred. My friends, I thank you all, from my heart, for your kindly wishes. Would that I could repay them as they deserve!
King. What do you mean?
Fred. To-day I am out of my indentures, and to-day I leave you for ever.
King. But this is quite unaccountable; a keener hand at scuttling a Cunarder or cutting out a White Star never shipped a handspike.
Fred. Yes, I have done my best for you. And why? It was my duty under my indentures, and I am the slave of duty. As a child I was regularly apprenticed to your band. It was through an error—no matter, the mistake was ours, not yours, and I was in honour bound by it.
Sam. An error? What error?
Fred. I may not tell you; it would reflect upon my well-loved Ruth.
[Ruth comes down to Frederic.
Ruth. Nay, dear master, my mind has long been gnawed by the cankering tooth of mystery. Better have it out at once.
Song.—Ruth.
(Kneeling at his feet.) Oh, pardon! Frederic, pardon!
Fred. Rise, sweet one; I have long pardoned you.
Ruth (rises). The two words were so much alike.
Fred. They were. They still are, though years have rolled over their heads. (Ruth goes up with Samuel.) But this afternoon my obligation ceases. Individually I love you all with affection unspeakable, but collectively, I look upon you with a disgust that amounts to absolute detestation. Oh! pity me, my beloved friend, for such is my sense of duty, that once out of my indentures I shall feel myself bound to devote myself heart and soul to your extermination!
All. Poor lad! poor lad! (All weep.)
King. Well, Frederic, if you conscientiously feel that it is your duty to destroy us, we cannot blame you for acting on that conviction. Always act in accordance with the dictates of your conscience, my boy, and chance the consequences.
Sam. Besides, we can offer you but little temptation to remain with us. We don’t seem to make piracy pay. I’m sure I don’t know why, but we don’t.
Fred. I know why, but, alas! I mustn’t tell you; it wouldn’t be right.
King. Why not, my boy? It’s only half-past eleven, and you are one of us until the clock strikes twelve.
Sam. True, and until then you are bound to protect our interests.
All. Hear, hear!
Fred. Well, then, it is my duty, as a pirate, to tell you that you are too tender-hearted. For instance, you make a point of never attacking a weaker party than yourselves, and when you attack a stronger party, you invariably get thrashed.
King. There is some truth in that.
Fred. Then, again, you make a point of never molesting an orphan!
Sam. Of course: we are orphans ourselves, and know what it is.
Fred. Yes, but it has got about, and what is the consequence? Every one we capture says he’s an orphan. The last three ships we took proved to be manned entirely by orphans, and so we had to let them go. One would think that Great Britain’s mercantile navy was recruited solely from her orphan asylums—which we know is not the case.
Sam. But, hang it all, you wouldn’t have us absolutely merciless?
Fred. There’s my difficulty; until twelve o’clock I would, after twelve I wouldn’t. Was ever a man placed in so delicate a situation!
Ruth. And Ruth, your own Ruth, whom you love so well, and who has won her middle-aged way into your boyish heart, what is to become of her?
King. Oh, he will take you with him.
Fred. Well, Ruth, I feel some little difficulty about you. It is true that I admire you very much, but I have been constantly at sea since I was eight years old, and yours is the only woman’s face I have seen during that time. I think it is a sweet face!
Ruth. It is, oh, it is!
Fred. I say I think it is; that is my impression. But as I have never had an opportunity of comparing you with other women, it is just possible I may be mistaken.
King. True.
Fred. What a terrible thing it would be if I were to marry this innocent person, and then find out that she is, on the whole, plain!
King. Oh, Ruth is very well, very well indeed.
Sam. Yes, there are the remains of a fine woman about Ruth.
Fred. Do you really think so? Then I will not be so selfish as to take her from you. In justice to her, and in consideration for you, I will leave her behind. (Hands Ruth to King.)
King. No, Frederic, this must not be. We are rough men, who lead a rough life, but we are not so utterly heartless as to deprive thee of thy love. I think I am right in saying that there is not one here who would rob thee of this inestimable treasure for all the world holds dear.
All (loudly). Not one!
King. No, I thought there wasn’t. Keep thy love, Frederic, keep thy love. (Hands her back to Frederic.)
Fred. You’re very good, I’m sure.
King. Well, it’s the top of the tide, and we must be off. Farewell, Frederic. When your process of extermination begins, let our deaths be as swift and painless as you can conveniently make them.
Fred. I will! By the love I have for you, I swear it! Would that you could render this extermination unnecessary by accompanying me back to civilization!
King. No, Frederic, it cannot be. I don’t think much of our profession, but, contrasted with respectability, it is comparatively honest. No, Frederic, I shall live and die a pirate king.
Song.—Pirate King.
[After song, the King, Samuel, and all the Pirates, excepting Frederic and Ruth, go off; Frederic comes, followed by Ruth.
Ruth. Oh, take me with you! I cannot live if I am left behind.
Fred. Ruth, I will be quite candid with you: you are very dear to me, as you know, but I must be circumspect. You see, you are considerably older than I. A lad of twenty-one usually looks for a wife of seventeen.
Ruth. A wife of seventeen! You will find me a wife of a thousand!
Fred. No, but I shall find you a wife of forty-seven, and that is quite enough. Ruth, tell me candidly, and without reserve—compared with other women, how are you?
Ruth. I will answer you truthfully, master; I have a slight cold, but otherwise I am quite well.
Fred. I am sorry for your cold, but I was referring rather to your personal appearance. Compared with other women—are you beautiful?
Ruth (bashfully). I have been told so, dear master.
Fred. Ah, but lately?
Ruth. Oh no, years and years ago.
Fred. What do you think of yourself?
Ruth. It is a delicate question to answer, but I think I am a fine woman.
Fred. That is your candid opinion?
Ruth. Yes, I should be deceiving you if I told you otherwise.
Fred. Thank you, Ruth; I believe you, for I am sure you would not practise on my inexperience. I wish to do the right thing, and if—I say if—you are really a fine woman, your age shall be no obstacle to our union. (Shakes hands with her. Chorus of Girls heard in the distance, “Climbing over rocky mountain” etc. See entrance of Girls.) Hark! Surely I hear voices! Who has ventured to approach our all but inaccessible lair? Can it be Custom House? No, it does not sound like Custom House.
Ruth (aside). Confusion! it is the voices of young girls! If he should see them I am lost.
Fred. (climbing rocky arch and looking off). By all that’s marvellous, a bevy of beautiful maidens!
Ruth (aside). Lost! lost! lost!
Fred. How lovely! how surpassingly lovely is the plainest of them! What grace! what delicacy! what refinement! And Ruth—Ruth told me she was beautiful!
Recitative.
Duet.—Frederic and Ruth.
Ensemble.
| Ruth. | Frederic. |
| Don’t, beloved master, | Yes, your former master |
| Crush me with disaster. | Saves you from disaster. |
| What is such a dower to the dower I have here, etc. | Your love would be uncomfortably fervid, it is clear, |
| If, as you are stating, | |
| It’s been accumulating | |
| Forty-seven year—forty-seven year. |
[At the end he renounces her, and she goes off in despair.
Recitative—Frederic.
[Hides in cave as they enter, climbing over the rocks and through arched rock.
Kate. What a picturesque spot! I wonder where we are!
Edith. And I wonder where papa is. We have left him ever so far behind.
Isa. Oh, he will be here presently! Remember, poor papa is not as young as we are, and we have come over a rather difficult country.
Kate. But how thoroughly delightful it is to be so entirely alone! Why, in all probability we are the first human beings who ever set foot on this enchanting spot.
Isa. Except the mermaids—it’s the very place for mermaids.
Kate. Who are only human beings down to the waist!
Edith. And who can’t be said strictly to set foot anywhere. Tails they may, but feet they cannot.
Kate. But what shall we do until papa and the servants arrive with the luncheon?
[All rise and come down.
Edith. We are quite alone, and the sea is as smooth as glass. Suppose we take off our shoes and stockings and paddle.
All. Yes, yes. The very thing!
[They prepare to carry out the suggestion. They have all taken off one shoe, when Frederic comes forward from cave.
Recitative.
[Put on their shoes, and group in semicircle.
Song.—Frederic.
Mabel enters through arch.
Recitative.—Mabel.
Song.—Mabel.
[Mabel and Frederic exit into cave and converse. Kate beckons her sisters, who form in a semicircle around her.
Edith.
Kate.
Ladies. Yes, yes; let’s talk about the weather.
[Edith, Kate, and Girls retire and sit two and two, facing each other, in a line across.
Mabel and Frederic enter from cave.
Chattering Chorus.
[During Mabel’s solo the Girls continue chatter pianissimo, but listening eagerly all the time.
Solo—Mabel.
Fred. Oh yes—ah, yes; this is exceeding gladness.
[Frederic and Mabel turn and see that the Girls are listening; detected, they continue their chatter forte.
Solo—Frederic.
[During this, Girls continue their chatter pianissimo as before, but listening intently all the time.
Mab. Ah, yes—ah, yes; I am a lady of position.
[Mabel and Frederic turn as before; Girls resume their chatter forte.
Ensemble.
| Mabel. | Fred. | Girls. |
| Did ever maiden wake, etc. | Did ever pirate loathed, etc. | How beautifully blue the sky, etc. |
Recitative.—Fred.
Girls.
[During this chorus the Pirates have entered stealthily, and formed in a semicircle behind the Girls. As the Girls move to go off, each Pirate seizes a girl. King seizes Edith, Samuel seizes Kate.
Ensemble.
| (Pirates pass in front of Ladies.) | (Ladies pass in front of Pirates.) |
| Pirates. | Ladies. |
| Here’s a first-rate opportunity | We have missed our opportunity |
| To get married with impunity, | Of escaping with impunity; |
| And indulge in the felicity | So farewell to the felicity |
| Of unbounded domesticity. | Of our maiden domesticity. |
| You shall quickly be parsonified, | We shall quickly be parsonified, |
| Conjugally matrimonified | Conjugally matrimonified |
| By a doctor of divinity, | By a doctor of divinity, |
| Who is located in this vicinity. | Who is located in this vicinity. |
Recitative.—Mabel (coming forward).
Ladies. Yes, yes; he is a major-general.
The Major-General has entered unnoticed on rock.
Song.—Major-General.
Gen. And now that I’ve introduced myself I should like to have some idea of what’s going on.
Kate. Oh, papa—we——
Sam. Permit me, I’ll explain in two words: we propose to marry your daughters.
Gen. Dear me!
Girls. Against our wills, papa—against our wills!
Gen. Oh, but you mustn’t do that. May I ask—this is a picturesque costume, but I’m not familiar with it—what are you?
King. We are all single gentlemen.
Gen. Yes, I gathered that—anything else?
King. No, nothing else.
Edith. Papa, don’t believe them, they are pirates—the famous Pirates of Penzance!
Gen. The Pirates of Penzance? I have often heard of them.
Mab. All except this gentleman—(indicating Frederick)—who was a pirate once, but who is out of his indentures to-day, and who means to lead a blameless life evermore.
Gen. But wait a bit. I object to pirates as sons-in-law.
King. We object to major-generals as fathers-in-law. But we waive that point. We do not press it. We look over it.
Gen. (aside). Hah! an idea! (Aloud.) And do you mean to say that you would deliberately rob me of these the sole remaining props of my old age, and leave me to go through the remainder of life unfriended, unprotected, and alone?
King. Well, yes, that’s the idea.
Gen. Tell me, have you ever known what it is to be an orphan?
Pirates (disgusted). Oh, dash it all!
King. Here we are again!
Gen. I ask you, have you ever known what it is to be an orphan?
King. Often!
Gen. Yes, orphan. Have you ever known what it is to be one?
King. I say, often.
All (disgusted). Often, often, often. (Turning away.)
Gen. I don’t think we quite understand one another. I ask you, have you ever known what it is to be an orphan, and you say “orphan.” As I understand you, you are merely repeating the word “orphan” to show that you understand me.
King. I didn’t repeat the word often.
Gen. Pardon me, you did indeed.
King. I only repeated it once.
Gen. True, but you repeated it.
King. But not often.
Gen. Stop, I think I see where we are getting confused. When you said “orphan,” did you mean “orphan”—a person who has lost his parents; or often—frequently?
King. Ah, I beg pardon, I see what you mean—frequently.
Gen. Ah, you said often—frequently.
King. No, only once.
Gen. (irritated). Exactly, you said often, frequently, only once.
Finale.
Recitative.—General.
Solo.—General.
[General comes down. Principals come down. Ladies rise.
Ensemble.
| General. | Girls (aside). | Pirates (aside). |
| I’m telling a terrible story, | He’s telling a terrible story, | If he’s telling a terrible story |
| But it doesn’t diminish my glory; | Which will tend to diminish his glory. | He shall die by a death that is gory, |
| For they would have taken my daughters | Though they would have taken his daughters | One of the cruellest slaughters |
| Over the billowy waters, | Over the billowy waters, | That ever were known in these waters; |
| If I hadn’t, in elegant diction. | It’s easy, in elegant diction, | And we’ll finish his moral affliction |
| Indulged in an innocent fiction; | To call it an innocent fiction; | By a very complete malediction, |
| Which is not in the same category | But it comes in the same category | As a compliment valedictory, |
| As a regular terrible story. | As a regular terrible story. | If he’s telling a terrible story. |
King.
All (kneeling).
King.
Ruth enters, and comes down to Frederic, and kneels.
[Pirates come in front of Ladies.
[Frederic casts Ruth from him. Exit Ruth.
Ensemble.
[Girls and General go up rocks, while Pirates indulge in a wild dance of delight. The General produces a British flag, and the Pirate King, on arched rock, produces a black flag with skull and cross-bones. Picture.