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Porridge poetry

Chapter 3: PORRIDGE POETRY
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About This Book

A lighthearted assortment of short, comic verses aimed at children that riff on food, kitchens, and everyday objects through personification and playful nonsense. Each poem uses brisk rhyme, simple rhythms, and visual wordplay to stage compact comic scenes—whimsical characters, mock-instructions, and absurd situations—that blend culinary imagery with amusing observation. The tone remains jaunty and accessible, balancing silly invention and gentle satire across self-contained pieces suited to reading aloud or casual browsing.

PORRIDGE POETRY



THE PORRIDGE POET

Dear Children, I would have you know it:
That this is me, the Porridge Poet,
My inspiration’s in the ice-box;
My rhymes I pick out from the spice-box.
My verse is very free and easy,
Its flavour sometimes slightly cheesy;
But that, my friends, is no great crime in
The gentle art of kitchen rhymin’.
I’ve made delicious maccaronics
From peelings off spring philharmonics.
And as for comic songs or ballads,
I turn them out like summer salads.
’Tis to the cook-book that I owe it,
My reputation as a poet.
And if you’ll watch my pot a minute
I’ll show you how I mix things in it.
Now take a pint of vermicelli
And pound it to a nice smooth jelly;
If necessary use a hammer.
Then add a pinch or two of grammar.
Shake in an ounce of sifted syntax
And half a teaspoonful of tin tacks,
Then flavour with eggstravaganza,
And there you have a lovely stanza!

THE PORRIDGE POET