No. 9.
(Music.)
King.—
This is a very unpleasant situation,
But we must proceed without further hesitation.
This is as good a way as I knows—
(Pointing to scissors.)
To dispose of my foes!
(Executioner comes
down with scissors.)
All.—
This is as good a way—
This is as good a way as he knows
To dispose of his foes.
(Interlude.)
Maids.—
Oh! he’s going to have his head cut off—
Oh! how horrid he will look!
All.—
Shish! shish! shish! shish!
Never more—no, never, can he have his
Picture took. Never more—no, never, can he have his
Picture took.
(Executioner
prepares to cut Eben.’s head
off with scissors.)
King.—
Proceed!—why do you hesitate?
Suitors.—
Just look at him—
All.—
He’s going for to cut his head off!
He’s going for to cut his head off!!
He’s going for to cut his head off!!!
(All hold last note.)
(Prof. heard
outside.—all wait expectant holding note—enter
Prof. hurriedly—jumps
over wall—runs to centre—Tableau.)
No. 10.
Prof.—
Hold!
(Fast.) Never was a time when so fast I’ve had to travel,
Jumping over ditches and tremendous heaps of gravel,
Back yards, pits, and innumerable brick kilns,
Coal bins, ash heaps, otherwise impregnable;
Mud, dirt, wet and objectionable odors,
Chemically mixed of asafœtida and sodas,
Hedges, holes, apparently impossible,
Striving to stop this horrible slaughter.
(Opens book—pointing to it significantly.)
(Slowly.) Omnes boni—all good men.
In medio—in the middle of the head.
Capitam—all the hair.
Dividunt—they divide.
Part their hair in the middle of the head—so—
(Fast.) Putting this important observation into practice,
The interesting and absorbing scientific fact is,
If a person is too excitable,
Send for a brush and comb.
(Recit.) Just observe the demonstration of this point.
(Turns to Eben.—takes
out comb and brush and begins to part his hair in the middle while singing.)
Eben.—
Away—away—away! I tell you stand away!!
Prof.—
Now, Ebenezer, please be still.
All.—
Please be still—please be still.
Prof.—
And with this comb I’ll cure your ill.
All.—
Riley, please be still.
King.—
It’s pleasant, if you knew it.
All.—
Please be still—please be still.
Eben.—
I’d like to see you do it.
(Prof. gives
finishing touches to Eben.’s
hair—unbinds him—Eben.
gets up—rubs his eyes—then goes around shaking hands while
others are singing.)
Prof.—
Success!
P., C., S. & K.—
Success!
All.—
Success!
Prof.—
Oh! I am a great astrologer—
All.—
A regular sockdologer.
Prof.—
A graduated colleger,
My name is Finigin,
I get my knowledge from the stars,
From pickled snakes put up in jars,
From dead men’s wired vertebras,
From skulls of apes and men.
All.—
He is a great ass—
(Prof. turns
and scowls.)
——trologer,
He is a great ass—trologer,
He is a great ass—trologer.
Eben. (pointing to Prof.)—
By virtue of his magic art,
In giving my hair a central part,
We’ve quenched this fiery Cinnamon Heart.
And caused my madness to depart.
(Cara. joins
Eben.—both take hands—come down on 1st
line—back on 2d.)
Eben. & Cara.—
Our troubles all are through,
Now I can marry you.
(Go back—King
comes down in same way.)
Eben. & King.—
Though I am black and blue,
I’ll mix the wedding brew.
(Goes back—Sassy. and Prof.
come forward in same way.)
Sassy. & Prof.—
There’s nothing more to do,
We can be married too.
(Go back—K., C., E., S. & P.
take hands and come down in same way.)
An invitation true
We now present to you.
(To audience.)
All.—
Hi yar—Hi yar—we’ll all be married too—Hi yar,
Hi yar—Hi yar—an invitation true—Hi yar!
Hi yar—Hi yar—we now extend to you—Hi yar!
Hi yar—Hi yar—we’ll all be married too—Hi yar!
(Repeat faster.)
CURTAIN.