The Kacháris

There was once an old man and an old woman, and they had an only son. One day he begged rupees of the old people to buy a bullock, but they, seeing the lad was an innocent, refused his request. However, on his importuning them, they gave him sixteen rupees. On which he marched off to purchase his bullock, and finding a fine one where three roads met, he put down his money on the road and led the beast away, but as he was going, he tied his new acquisition to a branch, and, as he was looking another way, it escaped. On which he started in search of it, and seeing a stag, hunted that, until by chance its horns stuck in a thicket. Thereon he tied a cord round its neck, and joining other cords to the first, finally reached his home. On which his father and mother asked, “Did not you set out to buy a bullock?” “To be sure I did,” he replied, “and if you help me to pull this cord, you will see the bullock I have bought.” So they all three tugged, and presently the stag appeared, kicking and struggling, to the great fear of the old people. They killed it, nevertheless, and sent its flesh round to the adjacent villages for sale. After which the boy went about saying that the villagers had eaten cow’s flesh. But seeing him to be a fool, no one paid much attention to what he said.

Another day, some time after, when the silly boy was rather bigger, he asked for money again to buy a wife with. And again, overcome by his obstinacy, they gave him sixteen rupees, taking which he set out in search of a maiden, and, after going some distance, took up his station at a place where the villagers draw water from the river. Presently a pretty girl came tripping down to get water, on which, as before, he put down his money and seized and carried off the girl. And since she was plump, he soon grew tired and rested under a tree. Presently a man leading a plough ox came that way, and he too joined the party and sat down. But the girl sat weeping and lamenting and crying her eyes out. Seeing which, the man said to the simpleton, “Where did you get that girl? And did you have a good look at her before you took her?” “Yes, I did,” said the lad, “I saw that she was a pretty girl, so I put down sixteen rupees at the village watering place and carried her off.” On which the cunning fellow said, “You must be blind, my friend; she may be a pretty girl, but both her eyes are burst. Did you not see that? Why, look at them now. The water is running from them in streams. What are you going to do with a girl like that?”

On hearing that, the lad wanted to exchange the girl for the plough ox, and the man cunningly pretended to be unwilling, but was finally persuaded by the simpleton’s importunacy, and said, “There, take it, and begone.” So the exchange was effected, and each quickly went his own way, mightily pleased with his bargain.

After going some way, the boy met a man with a goat. This man too sat down. After a while the ox eased itself, and the man with the goat said, “That beast’s belly is burst, and in a day or two it will die.” The simpleton, believing every word he said, exchanged his ox for the goat, and went his way. Presently he met a man carrying a bunch of bananas, and sat down beside him. But the goat was hungry for grass and kept wandering about and crying “Ba! ba!” so that his master got no peace. Now the word “bā” in Kachári means “Carry me on your back.” So the boy was vexed, and crying “How shall I carry you on my back when I am so tired?” exchanged the goat for the bunch of bananas. And again each went his way.

By chance there came a man that way snapping his fingers. And he asked for the bananas. But the simpleton said, “I got those bananas in exchange for a goat, and you ask me for them! However, if you really want to eat the fruit, teach me the art of snapping the fingers, and you shall have them.” After an hour’s teaching, he had learned the difficult art, more or less, and, giving up the bananas, departed snapping his fingers.

Presently he came to a fine field of rice, and there forgot his new art. Fancying he had lost it in the rice, he began searching for it in the crop as women search for lice in one another’s hair, and the rice-field was all trodden down. And then the owner of the field came up and asked, “What are you looking for there?” The simpleton said, “I have lost something for which I gave sixteen rupees. If you will join me in my search, I shall be greatly obliged.” So the man searched too, and the crop suffered greatly. But finding nothing, the man, in pure vexation, snapped his fingers. On which the lad, crying, “That is just what I lost!” danced away gaily.

Soon after he paused on the bank of a pond, and again forgot his art, and began wading about in the mud looking for it. And a man asked him, as before, what he had lost. So he replied, “Something for which I gave sixteen rupees.” And the man joined him in the search, and both became covered with mud from head to foot. And, since they found nothing, the man grew angry, and snapped his fingers. On which the boy cried in joy, “Good sir, that is what I lost!” and danced away to his home. And when his old parents saw him covered with mud, they burst out laughing, and, until they heard his voice, did not know who he was. And when they asked what he had done with his money, he explained that he had bought a girl, whom he had exchanged for an ox, which he gave in exchange for a goat, which angered him by ordering him to carry it on his back, so that he exchanged it for a bunch of bananas, which he gave in exchange for the art of snapping his fingers. “And what else did you expect me to do?” said the simpleton! And that’s all!