To laugh it would be wrong,
The troubles of a worthy priest,
The burden of my song.
Three quarters of a year:
But oh! it cuts him like a scythe,
When tithing time draws near.
As one at point to die,
And long before the day appears,
He heaves up many a sigh.
Along the miry road,
Each heart as heavy as a log,
To make their payments good.
Is not to be express'd,
When he that takes and he that pays
Are both alike distress'd.
The clumsy swains alight,
With rueful faces and bald pates—
He trembles at the sight.
Each bumpkin of the clan,
Instead of paying what he owes,
Will cheat him if he can.
And flings his head before,
And looks as if he came to beg,
And not to quit a score.
The little boy and all?"
"All tight and well. And how do you,
Good Mr. What-d'ye-call?"
Were e'er such hungry folk?
There's little talking, and no wit;
It is no time to joke.
One spits upon the floor,
Yet not to give offence or grieve,
Holds up the cloth before.
And lumpish still as ever;
Like barrels with their bellies full,
They only weigh the heavier.
"Come, neighbours, we must wag"—
The money chinks, down drop their chins,
Each lugging out his bag.
And one of storms of hail,
And one of pigs that he has lost
By maggots at the tail.
In pulpit none shall hear:
But yet, methinks, to tell you true,
You sell it plaguy dear."
Or clergy made so fine?
A kick, that scarce would move a horse,
May kill a sound divine.
'Twould cost him, I dare say,
Less trouble taking twice the sum
Without the clowns that pay.
SONNET, ADDRESSED TO HENRY COWPER, ESQ.
On his emphatical and interesting Delivery of the Defence of Warren Hastings, Esq. in the House of Lords.
Legends prolix delivers in the ears
(Attentive when thou read'st) of England's peers,
Let verse at length yield thee thy just reward.
Expending late on all that length of plea
Thy generous powers, but silence honour'd thee,
Mute as e'er gazed on orator or bard.
Both heart and head; and couldst with music sweet
Of Attic phrase and senatorial tone,
Like thy renown'd forefathers, far and wide
Thy fame diffuse, praised not for utterance meet
Of others' speech, but magic of thy own.
LINES ADDRESSED TO DR. DARWIN,
AUTHOR OF "THE BOTANIC GARDEN."
Not oft so well agree,)
Sweet harmonist of Flora's court!
Conspire to honour thee.
Who oft themselves have known
The pangs of a poetic birth
By labours of their own.
Though various, yet complete,
Rich in embellishment as strong,
And learned as 'tis sweet.
Though, could our hearts repine
At any poet's happier lays,
They would—they must at thine.
Of friendship's closest tie,
Can gaze on even Darwin's wit
With an unjaundiced eye;
And howsoever known,
Who would not twine a wreath for thee,
Unworthy of his own.
ON MRS. MONTAGU'S FEATHER-HANGINGS.
To dress a room for Montagu.
The peacock sends his heavenly dyes,
His rainbows and his starry eyes;
The pheasant plumes, which round enfold
His mantling neck with downy gold;
The cock his arch'd tail's azure show;
And, river-blanch'd, the swan his snow.
All tribes beside of Indian name,
That glossy shine, or vivid flame,
Where rises, and where sets the day,
Whate'er they boast of rich and gay,
Contribute to the gorgeous plan,
Proud to advance it all they can.
This plumage neither dashing shower,
Nor blasts, that shake the dripping bower,
Shall drench again or discompose,
But, screen'd from every storm that blows,
It boasts a splendour ever new,
Safe with protecting Montagu.
To the same patroness resort,
Secure of favour at her court,
Strong Genius, from whose forge of thought
Forms rise, to quick perfection wrought,
Which, though new-born, with vigour move,
Like Pallas springing arm'd from Jove—
Imagination scattering round
Wild roses over furrow'd ground,
Which Labour of his frown beguile,
And teach Philosophy a smile—
Wit flashing on Religion's side,
Whose fires, to sacred Truth applied,
The gem, though luminous before,
Obtrude on human notice more,
Like sunbeams on the golden height
Of some tall temple playing bright—
Well tutor'd Learning, from his books
Dismiss'd with grave, not haughty, looks,
Their order on his shelves exact,
Not more harmonious or compact
Than that to which he keeps confined
The various treasures of his mind—
All these to Montagu's repair,
Ambitious of a shelter there.
There Genius, Learning, Fancy, Wit,
Their ruffled plumage calm refit,
(For stormy troubles loudest roar
Around their flight who highest soar,)
And in her eye, and by her aid,
Shine safe without a fear to fade.
She thus maintains divided sway
With yon bright regent of the day;
The Plume and Poet both we know
Their lustre to his influence owe;
And she the works of Phœbus aiding,
Both Poet saves and Plume from fading.
VERSES,
Supposed to be written by Alexander Selkirk, during his solitary abode in the island of Juan Fernandez.
My right there is none to dispute;
From the centre all round to the sea
I am lord of the fowl and the brute.
O Solitude! where are the charms
That sages have seen in thy face?
Better dwell in the midst of alarms
Than reign in this horrible place.
I must finish my journey alone,
Never hear the sweet music of speech,
I start at the sound of my own.
The beasts, that roam over the plain,
My form with indifference see;
They are so unacquainted with man,
Their tameness is shocking to me.
Divinely bestow'd upon man,
O, had I the wings of a dove,
How soon would I taste you again!
My sorrows I then might assuage
In the ways of religion and truth,
Might learn from the wisdom of age,
And be cheer'd by the sallies of youth.
Resides in that heavenly word!
More precious than silver and gold
Or all that this earth can afford.
But the sound of the church-going bell
These valleys and rocks never heard,
Never sigh'd at the sound of a knell,
Or smiled when a sabbath appear'd.
Convey to this desolate shore
Some cordial endearing report
Of a land I shall visit no more.
My friends, do they now and then send
A wish or a thought after me?
O tell me I yet have a friend,
Though a friend I am never to see.
Compared with the speed of its flight,
The tempest itself lags behind,
And the swift-winged arrows of light.
When I think of my own native land,
In a moment I seem to be there;
But alas! recollection at hand
Soon hurries me back to despair.
The beast is laid down in his lair;
Even here is a season of rest,
And I to my cabin repair.
There's mercy in every place,
And mercy, encouraging thought!
Gives even affliction a grace,
And reconciles man to his lot.
ON OBSERVING SOME NAMES OF LITTLE NOTE
RECORDED IN THE BIOGRAPHIA BRITANNICA.
To names ignoble, born to be forgot!
In vain recorded in historic page,
They court the notice of a future age:
Those twinkling tiny lustres of the land
Drop one by one from Fame's neglecting hand;
Lethæan gulfs receive them as they fall,
And dark oblivion soon absorbs them all.
So when a child, as playful children use,
Has burnt to tinder a stale last year's news,
The flame extinct, he views the roving fire—
There goes my lady, and there goes the squire,
There goes the parson, oh illustrious spark!
And there, scarce less illustrious, goes the clerk!
REPORT OF AN ADJUDGED CASE,
NOT TO BE FOUND IN ANY OF THE BOOKS.
The spectacles set them unhappily wrong;
The point in dispute was, as all the world knows,
To which the said spectacles ought to belong.
With a great deal of skill, and a wig full of learning;
While chief baron Ear sat to balance the laws,
So famed for his talent in nicely discerning.
And your lordship, he said, will undoubtedly find,
That the Nose has had spectacles always in wear,
Which amounts to possession time out of mind.
Your lordship observes they are made with a straddle,
As wide as the ridge of the Nose is; in short,
Design'd to sit close to it, just like a saddle.
('Tis a case that has happen'd, and may be again)
That the visage or countenance had not a Nose,
Pray who would, or who could, wear spectacles then?
With a reasoning the court will never condemn,
That the spectacles plainly were made for the Nose,
And the Nose was as plainly intended for them.
He pleaded again in behalf of the Eyes:
But what were his arguments few people know,
For the court did not think they were equally wise.
Decisive and clear, without one if or but—
That, whenever the Nose put his spectacles on,
By daylight or candlelight—Eyes should be shut!
ON THE PROMOTION OF EDWARD THURLOW, ESQ.
TO THE LORD HIGH CHANCELLORSHIP OF ENGLAND.
And in his sportive days,
Fair Science pour'd the light of truth,
And Genius shed his rays.
The experienced and the sage,
Ambition in a boy supplied
With all the skill of age!
Proclaim him born to sway
The balance in the highest place,
And bear the palm away.
He sprang impetuous forth,
Secure of conquest, where the prize
Attends superior worth.
Ere yet he starts is known,
And does but at the goal obtain
What all had deem'd his own.
ODE TO PEACE.
Return, and make thy downy nest
Once more in this sad heart:
Nor riches I nor power pursue,
Nor hold forbidden joys in view;
We therefore need not part.
From avarice and ambition free,
And pleasure's fatal wiles?
For whom, alas! dost thou prepare
The sweets that I was wont to share,
The banquet of thy smiles?
The heaven that thou alone canst make?
And wilt thou quit the stream
That murmurs through the dewy mead,
The grove and the sequestered shed,
To be a guest with them?
For thee I gladly sacrificed
Whatever I loved before;
And shall I see thee start away,
And helpless, hopeless, hear thee say—
Farewell! we meet no more?
HUMAN FRAILTY.
The purpose of to-day,
Woven with pains into his plan,
To-morrow rends away.
Vice seems already slain;
But Passion rudely snaps the string,
And it revives again.
Finds out his weaker part;
Virtue engages his assent,
But Pleasure wins his heart.
Through all his art we view;
And, while his tongue the charge denies,
His conscience owns it true.
And dangers little known,
A stranger to superior strength,
Man vainly trusts his own.
To reach the distant coast;
The breath of Heaven must swell the sail,
Or all the toil is lost.
THE MODERN PATRIOT.
I only wish 'twould come
(As who knows but perhaps it may?)
A little nearer home.
On t'other side the Atlantic,
I always held them in the right,
But most so when most frantic.
That man shall be my toast,
If breaking windows be the sport,
Who bravely breaks the most.
The choicest flowers she bears,
Who constitutionally pulls
Your house about your ears.
Though some folks can't endure them,
Who say the mob are mad outright,
And that a rope must cure them.
Such strings for all who need 'em—
What! hang a man for going mad!
Then farewell British freedom.
ON THE BURNING OF LORD MANSFIELD'S LIBRARY,
TOGETHER WITH HIS MSS. BY THE MOB, IN THE MONTH OF JUNE, 1780.
Sworn foes to sense and law,
Have burnt to dust a nobler pile
Than ever Roman saw!
And many a treasure more,
The well-judged purchase, and the gift
That graced his letter'd store.
The loss was his alone;
But ages yet to come shall mourn
The burning of his own.
ON THE SAME.
In all devouring flame,
They tell us of the fate of Rome,
And bid us fear the same.
They felt the rude alarm,
Yet bless'd the guardian care that kept
His sacred head from harm.
From Flora's balmy store,
The quintessence of all he read
Had treasured up before.
Have done him cruel wrong;
The flowers are gone—but still we find
The honey on his tongue.
THE LOVE OF THE WORLD REPROVED;
OR, HYPOCRISY DETECTED.[821]
Good Mussulman, abstain from pork;
There is a part in every swine
No friend or follower of mine
May taste, whate'er his inclination,
On pain of excommunication.
Such Mahomet's mysterious charge,
And thus he left the point at large.
Had he the sinful part express'd,
They might with safety eat the rest;
But for one piece they thought it hard
From the whole hog to be debarr'd;
And set their wit at work to find
What joint the prophet had in mind.
Much controversy straight arose,
These choose the back, the belly those;
By some 'tis confidently said
He meant not to forbid the head;
While others at that doctrine rail,
And piously prefer the tail.
Thus, conscience freed from every clog,
Mahometans eat up the hog.
You laugh—'tis well—the tale applied
May make you laugh on t'other side.
Renounce the world—the preacher cries.
We do—a multitude replies.
While one as innocent regards
A snug and friendly game at cards;
And one, whatever you may say,
Can see no evil in a play;
Some love a concert, or a race;
And others shooting, and the chase.
Reviled and loved, renounced and follow'd,
Thus, bit by bit, the world is swallow'd;
Each thinks his neighbour makes too free,
Yet likes a slice as well as he:
With sophistry their sauce they sweeten,
Till quite from tail to snout 'tis eaten.
ON THE DEATH OF MRS. (NOW LADY) THROCKMORTON'S BULLFINCH.
With tears o'er hapless favourites shed,
O share Maria's grief!
Her favourite, even in his cage,
(What will not hunger's cruel rage?)
Assassin'd by a thief.
The egg was laid from which he sprung;
And, though by nature mute,
Or only with a whistle blest,
Well taught he all the sounds express'd
Of flageolet or flute.
Were brighter than the sleekest mole,
His bosom of the hue
With which Aurora decks the skies,
When piping winds shall soon arise,
To sweep away the dew.
Dire foe alike of bird and mouse
No cat had leave to dwell;
And Bully's cage supported stood
On props of smoothest shaven wood,
Large-built and latticed well.
Not rough with wire of steel or brass,
For Bully's plumage sake,
But smooth with wands from Ouse's side,
With which, when neatly peel'd and dried,
The swains their baskets make.
When, led by instinct sharp and sure,
Subsistence to provide,
A beast forth sallied on the scout,
Long back'd, long tail'd, with whisker'd snout,
And badger-colour'd hide.
Its ample area 'gan explore;
And something in the wind
Conjectured, sniffing round and round,
Better than all the books he found,
Food chiefly for the mind.
A dream disturb'd poor Bully's rest;
In sleep he seem'd to view
A rat fast clinging to the cage,
And, screaming at the sad presage,
Awoke and found it true.
Right to his mark the monster went—
Ah, muse! forbear to speak
Minute the horrors that ensued;
His teeth were strong, the cage was wood—
He left poor Bully's beak.
That beak, whence issued many a lay
Of such mellifluous tone,
Might have repaid him well, I wote,
For silencing so sweet a throat,
Fast stuck within his own.
So when, by Bacchanalians torn,
On Thracian Hebrus' side
The tree-enchanter Orpheus fell,
His head alone remain'd to tell
The cruel death he died.
THE ROSE.
Which Mary to Anna convey'd,
The plentiful moisture encumber'd the flower,
And weigh'd down its beautiful head.
And it seem'd, to a fanciful view,
To weep for the buds it had left, with regret,
On the flourishing bush where it grew.
For a nosegay, so dripping and drown'd,
And swinging it rudely, too rudely, alas!
I snapp'd it, it fell to the ground.
Some act by the delicate mind,
Regardless of wringing and breaking a heart
Already to sorrow resign'd.
Might have bloom'd with its owner a while;
And the tear, that is wiped with a little address,
May be follow'd perhaps by a smile.
THE DOVES.
Man yet mistakes his way
While meaner things, whom instinct leads,
Are rarely known to stray.
And heard the voice of love;
The turtle thus address'd her mate,
And soothed the listening dove:
No time shall disengage,
Those blessings of our early youth
Shall cheer our latest age:
And constancy sincere,
Shall fill the circles of those eyes,
And mine can read them there;
Shall ne'er be felt by me,
Or gently felt, and only so,
As being shared with thee.
Or kites are hovering near,
I fear lest thee alone they seize,
And know no other fear.
And press thy wedded side,
Resolved a union form'd for life
Death never shall divide.
(Forgive a transient thought,)
Thou couldst become unkind at last,
And scorn thy present lot,
Or kites with cruel beak;
Denied the endearments of thine eye,
This widow'd heart would break.
Soft as the passing wind,
And I recorded what I heard,
A lesson for mankind.
A FABLE.
Her new-laid eggs she fondly press'd,
And, on her wicker-work high mounted,
Her chickens prematurely counted,
(A fault philosophers might blame,
If quite exempted from the same,)
Enjoy'd at ease the genial day;
'Twas April, as the bumpkins say,
The legislature call'd it May.
But suddenly a wind, as high
As ever swept a winter sky,
Shook the young leaves about her ears,
And fill'd her with a thousand fears,
Lest the rude blast should snap the bough,
And spread her golden hopes below.
But just at eve the blowing weather
And all her fears were hush'd together:
And now, quoth poor unthinking Ralph,
'Tis over, and the brood is safe;
(For ravens, though, as birds of omen,
They teach both conjurors and old women
To tell us what is to befall,
Can't prophesy themselves at all.)
The morning came, when neighbour Hodge,
Who long had mark'd her airy lodge,
And destined all the treasure there
A gift to his expecting fair,
Climb'd like a squirrel to his dray,
And bore the worthless prize away.
MORAL.
In every change both mine and yours:
Safety consists not in escape
From dangers of a frightful shape;
An earthquake may be bid to spare
The man that's strangled by a hair.
Fate steals along with silent tread,
Found oft'nest in what least we dread,
Frowns in the storm with angry brow,
But in the sunshine strikes the blow.
ODE TO APOLLO.
ON AN INKGLASS ALMOST DRIED IN THE SUN.
That, to the wrong side leaning,
Indite much metre with much pains,
And little or no meaning;
That water all the nations,
Pay tribute to thy glorious beams,
In constant exhalations;
Too covetous of drink,
Apollo, hast thou stolen away
A poet's drop of ink?
It floats a vapour now,
Impell'd through regions dense and rare,
By all the winds that blow.
Combined with millions more,
To form an iris in the skies,
Though black and foul before.
Beyond the happiest lot,
Of all that ever pass'd my pen,
So soon to be forgot!
To place it in thy bow,
Give wit, that what is left may shine
With equal grace below.
A COMPARISON.
Both speed their journey with a restless stream,
The silent pace, with which they steal away,
No wealth can bribe, no prayers persuade to stay;
Alike irrevocable both when past,
And a wide ocean swallows both at last.
Though each resemble each in every part,
A difference strikes at length the musing heart;
Streams never flow in vain; where streams abound,
How laughs the land with various plenty crown'd!
But time, that should enrich the nobler mind,
Neglected leaves a dreary waste behind.
ANOTHER.
ADDRESSED TO A YOUNG LADY.
Apt emblem of a virtuous maid—
Silent and chaste she steals along,
Far from the world's gay busy throng;
With gentle yet prevailing force,
Intent upon her destined course;
Graceful and useful all she does,
Blessing and blest where'er she goes.
Pure-bosom'd as that watery glass,
And heaven reflected in her face.
THE POET'S NEW YEAR'S GIFT.
TO MRS. (NOW LADY) THROCKMORTON.
For thee wish'd many a time,
Both sad, and in a cheerful mood,
But never yet in rhyme.
More prudent, or more sprightly,
Or more ingenious, or more freed
From temper-flaws unsightly.
Can I for thee require,
In wedded love already blest,
To thy whole heart's desire?
Full bliss is bliss divine;
There dwells some wish in every heart,
And doubtless one in thine.
Which fate shall brightly gild,
('Tis blameless, be it what it may,)
I wish it all fulfill'd.
PAIRING TIME ANTICIPATED.
A FABLE.
'Tis clear, that they were always able
To hold discourse, at least in fable;
And e'en the child who knows no better
Than to interpret, by the letter,
A story of a cock and bull,
Must have a most uncommon skull.
It chanced then on a winter's day,
But warm, and bright, and calm as May,
The birds, conceiving a design
To forestall sweet St. Valentine,
In many an orchard, copse, and grove,
Assembled on affairs of love,
And with much twitter and much chatter
Began to agitate the matter.
At length a Bullfinch, who could boast
More years and wisdom than the most,
Entreated, opening wide his beak,
A moment's liberty to speak;
And, silence publicly enjoin'd,
Deliver'd briefly thus his mind:
My friends! be cautious how ye treat
The subject upon which we meet;
I fear we shall have winter yet.
A Finch, whose tongue knew no control,
With golden wing and satin poll,
A last year's bird, who ne'er had tried
What marriage means, thus pert replied:
Methinks the gentleman, quoth she,
Opposite in the apple tree,
By his good will would keep us single
Till yonder heaven and earth shall mingle,
Or (which is likelier to befall)
Till death exterminate us all.
I marry without more ado,
My dear Dick Redcap, what say you?
Dick heard, and tweedling, ogling, bridling,
Turning short round, strutting and sideling,
Attested, glad, his approbation
Of an immediate conjugation.
Their sentiments so well express'd
Influenced mightily the rest,
All pair'd, and each pair built a nest.
But, though the birds were thus in haste,
The leaves came on not quite so fast,
And destiny, that sometimes bears
An aspect stern on man's affairs,
Not altogether smiled on theirs.
The wind, of late breathed gently forth,
Now shifted east, and east by north;
Bare trees and shrubs but ill, you know,
Could shelter them from rain or snow,
Stepping into their nests, they paddled,
Themselves were chill'd, their eggs were addled;
Soon every father bird and mother
Grew quarrelsome, and peck'd each other,
Parted without the least regret,
Except that they had ever met,
And learn'd in future to be wiser,
Than to neglect a good adviser.