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"This was a man"

Chapter 14: ACT II
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About This Book

A three-act comedy that follows a successful portrait painter and his fashionable circle as romantic entanglements, jealousies, and social pretenses are unveiled. Action moves between the painter’s studio and a friend’s flat, where clandestine meetings, confidences, and flirtations reveal tensions between public decorum and private desire. Witty situations and incisive observation expose changing social manners and the characters’ attempts to manage reputation and intimacy, with complications building to dawn reckonings and ironic reversals.

ACT II

The scene is Evelyn Bathurst’s flat. It is a manly apartment, furnished with precision but no imagination. There is a door up left opening into a small hall and thence to the front door. Up right is Evie’s bedroom and down left a service door. Between these two is the fireplace, in front of which is a large sofa and a couple of armchairs. The windows occupy the right wall. The table, center, is laid for two.

[When the curtain rises, it is about 9.15 p.m. and Blackwell is putting the finishing touches, which consist of a bowl of roses and a bottle of champagne in an ice bucket. He is regarding his handiwork pensively when there comes the sound of a key in the front door. After a moment Evelyn and Carol enter. Evelyn is wearing a dinner jacket; Carol, an elaborately simple dinner dress and cloak.]

Carol

What a nice flat!

Evelyn

I’ve been here for years.

Carol

It’s all quite typical of you.

Evelyn

How do you know?

Carol

Well, don’t you think it is?

Evelyn

I’ve never thought about it much.

Carol

Solid and rather austere.

Evelyn

That sounds beastly.

Carol

No. I like it.

Evelyn

I’m glad. Let me take your cloak. [He takes her cloak and lays it over a chair.] Cocktails please, Blackwell.

Blackwell

Yes, sir.

[He goes off.]

Carol

I suppose he’s been with you as long as the flat?

Evelyn

Longer, really; he was my batman when I was a raw subaltern.

Carol

[Smiling]

You must have been rather nice as a subaltern.

Evelyn

Oh no, I wasn’t. You ask Edward.

Carol

Edward adores you.

Evelyn

We’re very old friends.

Carol

It’s always puzzled me. You’re so very different from each other.

Evelyn

Edward’s a damn sight cleverer.

Carol

Now then—

Evelyn

But he is.

Carol

You seem to have done very well at your job and you’re always winning things.

Evelyn

I haven’t done anything.

Carol

Nonsense. [She wanders round the room, looking at photographs.] Who’s this?

Evelyn

Mary Liddle. I was engaged to her once.

Carol

Oh, I see.

Evelyn

I suppose you want to know why nothing ever came of it.

Carol

Of course.

Evelyn

She ran off with some one she hardly knew.

Carol

What a shame!

Evelyn

I expect I bored her stiff—

Carol

Were you very much in love with her?

Evelyn

Yes. I think I was.

Carol

I can’t imagine you in love.

Evelyn

It doesn’t happen often.

Carol

[Smiling and patting his arm]

Never mind, Evie.

Evelyn

I don’t. It’s a relief really.

[Blackwell enters with the cocktails; they both take them.]

Evelyn

Dinner please, Blackwell.

Blackwell

Very good, sir.

[He goes out.]

Carol

[At another photograph]

Is this your mother?

Evelyn

Yes.

Carol

You’re awfully like her.

Evelyn

It’s the nose, I think.

Carol

And the chin—so firm and unrelenting. I love firm chins.

Evelyn

They’re awfully deceptive.

Carol

[Sipping her cocktail]

Are they, Evie?

Evelyn

Yes. I’m as weak as water, really.

Carol

You’ll have to prove it to me before I believe it.

Evelyn

I’d rather not.

[Blackwell enters with caviare.]

Evelyn

Come and sit down.

Carol

[Sitting at table]

What divine roses!

Evelyn

They’re in your honor.

Carol

Thank you. I hoped they were.

[Blackwell helps her to caviare.]

Evelyn

[Opening champagne]

I feel awfully flattered at your being here.

Carol

Why should you?

Evelyn

I just do.

Carol

Don’t be silly. [He fills her glass and his own.] Thanks.

Evelyn

I feel flattered because it’s something I never thought possible.

Carol

Me dining with you?

Evelyn

Yes.

Carol

Idiot.

[She smiles.]

Evelyn

I’ve always seen you as a frightfully dazzling creature—always in demand—always rushing about.

Carol

Just because you feel flattered yourself, you mustn’t begin to flatter me.

Evelyn

Is that flattery?

Carol

Isn’t it?

Evelyn

Well yes, and no.

Carol

You mean you’ve never quite approved of me.

Evelyn

I didn’t say that.

Carol

I believe it’s true, all the same.

Evelyn

I’ve wondered a bit what you were really like.

Carol

[With subtle pathos]

I don’t think I know, myself.

Evelyn

You haven’t had much time to think, have you?

Carol

No—I suppose not.

Evelyn

[Sententiously]

We’re all so different underneath.

Carol

[Laughing]

Oh, Evie!

Evelyn

What?

Carol

You’re awfully serious.

Evelyn

Don’t laugh at me.

Carol

I wasn’t.

Evelyn

I don’t mind, really; it shows that you’re enjoying yourself.

Carol

I am thoroughly.

Evelyn

I was terrified that you’d be bored.

Carol

You’re fishing again.

Evelyn

I wish you weren’t so quick; it embarrasses me.

[He laughs.]

Carol

I’ll try to be slower.

[She laughs too.]

Evelyn

I’m the plodding sort, you know—gets there in the end, but takes a long time about it.

Carol

Nonsense!

Evelyn

The British army doesn’t specialize in wit.

Carol

I won’t hear a word against the British army.

Evelyn

[With jocularity]

Hurrah!

[They both laugh.]

Carol

You’re like a schoolboy.

Evelyn

I feel one with you.

Carol

Do I look so terribly old?

Evelyn

You know I didn’t mean that.

Carol

I’ll let you off this time, but you mustn’t do it again.

[Blackwell enters with the soup; he takes away the caviare plates.]

Evelyn

How long is it since you dined quietly like this?

Carol

Oh, ages.

Evelyn

I thought so.

Carol

You’re looking disapproving again.

[Blackwell serves the soup and exits.]

Evelyn

I think I’m envious.

Carol

Envious?

Evelyn

Yes.

Carol

No, you’re not, really.

Evelyn

Your life would never suit me, I know, but somehow it does sound rather fun, for a change.

Carol

Let’s make a bargain.

Evelyn

I know what you’re going to say.

Carol

Change over for a bit.

Evelyn

Temptress.

Carol

You come out to a few theaters and parties with me—

Evelyn

I can’t dance well enough.

Carol

I’ll soon teach you.

Evelyn

I’d drive you mad.

Carol

Have you a gramophone here?

Evelyn

Yes.

Carol

We’ll start after dinner.

Evelyn

All right.

Carol

And whenever I’m tired and sick of everything, I’ll come here and dine quietly like this.

Evelyn

Will you, honestly?

Carol

Of course, if you stick to your side of the compact.

Evelyn

I don’t believe you’ll have the patience to carry it through.

Carol

You must despise me.

Evelyn

Despise you? Good Heavens! Why?

Carol

You’re so untrusting.

Evelyn

No, I’m not; but it does look as though I were going to get more out of this than you.

Carol

Not at all. It’s a perfectly fair exchange. You’ve no idea how utterly weary I get every now and then.

Evelyn

Poor Carol.

Carol

This is peace, absolute peace, and I’m tremendously grateful to you for it.

[They look at each other in silence for a moment. Evelyn’s expression is faintly nonplused.]

Evelyn

The compact’s on.

Carol

Good! Shake hands.

Evelyn

Right you are.

[They shake hands across the table. Carol allows hers to remain in his a shade more than is strictly necessary.]

Carol

Do you want to come to the first night of “Round Pegs” on Thursday?

Evelyn

What on earth’s that?

Carol

A new play by Burton Trask.

Evelyn

Who’s he?

Carol

[Laughing]

Oh, Evie!

Evelyn

Well, how should I know?

Carol

He’s only the most talked of dramatist we’ve got.

Evelyn

Sorry.

Carol

He wrote “The Sinful Spinster.”

Evelyn

Oh, the play all the fuss was about last year.

Carol

Yes.

Evelyn

It sounded pretty hot stuff.

Carol

It wasn’t, really, but the woman in it fell in love with a man younger than herself and the Church of England didn’t like it.

Evelyn

Oh, I see!

Carol

You need educating badly.

Evelyn

I’m afraid I do.

[Blackwell enters and takes away their soup plates.]

Carol

Wasn’t it funny us talking this afternoon and you asking me to dine all in a minute?

Evelyn

Awfully funny, but very lucky for me.

Carol

You make me feel shy when you say things like that. It was just as lucky for me.

Evelyn

[With intensity]

Was it, honestly?

Carol

[Looking down]

Of course.

[Blackwell enters with partridges and attendant vegetables. He serves them during the ensuing dialogue.]

Evelyn

Edward’s looking awfully tired these days.

Carol

[Absently]

Is he? I haven’t noticed it.

Evelyn

Why, you said so yourself this afternoon.

Carol

So I did. I remember he looked very wan when I came in. By the way, what were you two discussing so intently. I felt as though I were interrupting a Masonic meeting.

Evelyn

Nothing particular.

Carol

Me, by any chance?

Evelyn

Good Heavens, no!

Carol

There’s no need to be so vehement about it; it wouldn’t have mattered if you had been.

Evelyn

Have some more champagne.

Carol

Thanks—just a little.

[She holds out her glass and he fills it, also his own.]

Evelyn

[With great boldness]

Why did you think we were talking about you?

Carol

You both looked so guilty.

Evelyn

Surely that proves we weren’t.

Carol

Very good, Evie.

Evelyn

You’re embarrassing me dreadfully.

Carol

Am I? Why?

Evelyn

Because we were discussing you.

Carol

Ah!

Evelyn

I see it’s useless to try and deceive you for moment.

Carol

What were you saying?

Evelyn

Must I tell you?

Carol

Certainly.

Evelyn

You’re terribly unrelenting.

Carol

Come on—out with it.

Evelyn

I was lecturing Edward.

[Blackwell goes out.]

Carol

Lecturing him?

Evelyn

Yes. I said he was paying too much attention to his work and not enough to you.

Carol

And do you think that’s true?

Evelyn

Yes.

Carol

It isn’t; it’s the other way round, really. I neglect Edward. You should have saved your lecture for me.

Evelyn

I’m sure it’s his fault, really, he’s so damned lackadaisical.

Carol

It was nice of you, but a little interfering.

Evelyn

I’m sorry. I suppose I deserve to be snubbed.

Carol

I’m not snubbing you, exactly, but I’m puzzled.

Evelyn

Why puzzled?

Carol

It seems so strange that you should have taken up the cudgels on my side.

Evelyn

That was how I saw the situation.

Carol

I never realized there was a situation.

Evelyn

There isn’t, but there may be soon.

Carol

How horrid of you!

Evelyn

I know Edward pretty well, you know.

Carol

And me hardly at all.

Evelyn

Exactly. That’s why I went to him, as I told you this afternoon. I always felt that you disliked me and thought me dull.

Carol

How absurd!

Evelyn

You did, all the same. You’d have crushed me to the earth if I’d dared mention the subject to you.

Carol

You must have thought me a prig.

Evelyn

Not in the least. I quite saw your point.

Carol

And now—?

Evelyn

Now I’m muddled.

Carol

Have I muddled you, Evie?

Evelyn

Yes, terribly.

Carol

I’m so glad.

Evelyn

That’s malicious of you.

Carol

Go ahead with your lecture.

Evelyn

Certainly not.

Carol

Whose fault do you consider this slight drifting apart—Edward’s or mine?

Evelyn

Edward’s.

Carol

I told you it was mine.

Evelyn

I don’t believe you.

Carol

Stubborn.

Evelyn

Is it yours?

Carol

Yes.

Evelyn

Why?

Carol

[Seriously]

Oh, Evie—

Evelyn

Tell me.

Carol

It’s rather difficult.

Evelyn

I’m awfully sympathetic.

Carol

I believe you are.

Evelyn

You love him still, don’t you?

Carol

Yes—in a way.

Evelyn

But not so much as you did?

Carol

Not quite so much.

Evelyn

I suppose that’s inevitable in married life, always.

Carol

I expect it is.

Evelyn

It’s sad, though.

Carol

Not if one isn’t sentimental about it.

Evelyn

Are you ever sentimental about anything?

Carol

[Wistfully]

Do I seem so hard?

Evelyn

A little, I think.

Carol

I’m not, really.

Evelyn

I’m afraid Edward’s unhappy.

Carol

Not deep down inside.

Evelyn

Are you sure?

Carol

He may think he is.

Evelyn

Poor Edward.

Carol

He doesn’t love me quite so much, either, you know.

Evelyn

Perhaps he wants to, but you won’t let him.

Carol

Evie, why are we talking like this?

Evelyn

I don’t know.

Carol

I can’t bear to pretend about things.

Evelyn

You’re quite right; it doesn’t pay in the long run.

Carol

But I don’t want you to blame Edward and lecture him for something that’s not entirely his fault.

Evelyn

I see.

Carol

I’m awfully fond of him and I always shall be, but—

Evelyn

But what?

Carol

Don’t let’s say any more about it.

Evelyn

All right. You’re rather a dear, you know.

Carol

Am I?

Evelyn

More than I ever suspected!

Carol

Oh, Evie!

[They look at each other for a moment, Evelyn intently, Carol with a faintly wistful smile. Blackwell enters to collect the plates and serve the sweet—pêche Melba—which he does during ensuing dialogue.]

Evelyn

You don’t like Zoe St. Merryn, do you?

Carol

Why do you suddenly ask that?

Evelyn

I felt you didn’t this afternoon.

Carol

She’s rather obvious, I think.

Evelyn

In what way?

Carol

She tries to be clever.

Evelyn

I always thought she was clever.

Carol

Yes, most men do, but very few women.

Evelyn

Why is that?

Carol

Because they see through her. All that divorce business was a put-up job.

Evelyn

I say, Carol!

Carol

Don’t look so shocked. Of course it was. She’s been so brave and defiant over it. Men love that.

Evelyn

Aren’t you being a little hard on her?

Carol

No, not really. I know her type so well.

Evelyn

She’s an old friend of Edward’s, isn’t she?

Carol

Yes, but that hasn’t anything to do with it. She tried to marry him once.

Evelyn

He seems very fond of her.

Carol

She flatters him terribly. He’s an awful baby.

Evelyn

Thank Heaven I haven’t got your feminine intuition. It must complicate life dreadfully.

Carol

It’s very useful sometimes.

Evelyn

Do you size everyone up so mercilessly.

Carol

[Laughing]

Perhaps.

Evelyn

I’m trembling visibly.

Carol

Nonsense! You’re not frightened by anything, really.

Evelyn

You don’t know!

[Blackwell goes out.]

Carol

Well, you shouldn’t be, anyhow.

Evelyn

That’s different.

Carol

Why did you ask me not to tell Edward I was dining with you?

Evelyn

[Nonplused]

Did I?

Carol

You know you did.

Evelyn

Perhaps I was afraid he’d think I was interfering again.

Carol

Did he tell you that, too?

Evelyn

Yes.

Carol

[Smiling]

Never mind.

Evelyn

I don’t. I’m used to Edward.

Carol

So am I.

Evelyn

But when you tell me I’m interfering, I feel beastly.

Carol

You are, you know.

Evelyn

There! You’ve done it again.

Carol

People like Edward and me should be left to manage our own troubles.

Evelyn

All right. From now on I won’t say a word.

Carol

Cheer up.

Evelyn

I’m a blundering fool, anyhow.

Carol

[Laughing]

Yes.

Evelyn

And instead of making you like me, I’ve made you laugh at me.

Carol

That’s not quite true.

Evelyn

I’m afraid it is.

Carol

You don’t know a bit what I’m really like.

Evelyn

No.

Carol

Do you want to?

Evelyn

Yes.

Carol

I’m not sure that it’s wise.

Evelyn

Why not?

Carol

You might be shocked.

Evelyn

As bad as that?

Carol

Yes—as bad as that.

Evelyn

I don’t believe it.

Carol

Good.

Evelyn

You’re too sensitive to behave really badly.

Carol

That’s nonsense.

Evelyn

No, it isn’t.

Carol

Sensitiveness hasn’t anything to do with it.

Evelyn

Yes, it has.

Carol

Don’t contradict me.

Evelyn

[With truculence]

Why shouldn’t I?

Carol

Because it infuriates me.

Evelyn

[Slowly]

We’re almost quarreling.

Carol

Yes.

Evelyn

I’m sorry.

Carol

Antagonism is a bad sign.

Evelyn

What do you mean?

Carol

[Suddenly burying her face in her hands]

Oh, Evie!

Evelyn

[Alarmed]

What on earth’s the matter?

Carol

[Muffled]

Nothing.

Evelyn

Carol, don’t—please—

[He gets up and comes to her.]

Carol

No, no. Sit down. Your man will be in in a moment.

Evelyn

Do tell me what’s wrong.

Carol

Sit down, please.

Evelyn

All right.

[He sits down.]

Carol

Give me my bag, will you? It’s over there. I want to powder my nose.

[Evelyn rises. When his back is toward her, an expression of extreme satisfaction flits across Carol’s face. By the time he has turned she is once again bravely melancholy.]

Evelyn

Here.

[He gives her her bag.]

Carol

Thank you.

[She looks up at him with a weary smile. Blackwell enters and takes away the remains of the sweet.]

Evelyn

Serve the coffee at once, Blackwell; then I shan’t want you any more.

Blackwell

Very good, sir.

[He goes out.]

Carol

I feel better now.

Evelyn

I don’t suppose you’ll ever want to dine with me again.

Carol

Don’t be silly. Of course I shall.

Evelyn

I seem to have depressed you terribly.

Carol

No—it’s not your fault, really.

Evelyn

I wish I understood you a bit better.

Carol

I’m glad you don’t.

[Blackwell enters with coffee and liqueurs, which he places beside Evelyn.]

Evelyn

Thank you, Blackwell. Good night.

Blackwell

Good night, sir.

[He goes out.]

Evelyn

Coffee?

Carol

Yes, please.

Evelyn

[Pouring it out]

Sugar?

Carol

One.

Evelyn

[Handing it to her]

There. Cointreau or brandy?

Carol

Cointreau—just a little.

Evelyn

The brandy’s very good.

Carol

All right. Brandy, then—you’re so dominant.

Evelyn

Don’t laugh at me any more.

Carol

I must a little.

Evelyn

Here you are.

[He gives her some brandy and takes some himself.]

Carol

Next time I come I’ll try to be more amusing.

Evelyn

I don’t want you to be amusing if you don’t feel like it.

Carol

You’re awfully kind and gentle.

Evelyn

I want you to relax completely.

Carol

I am relaxing completely.

Evelyn

I feel you need it.

Carol

No one else has ever taken the trouble to feel that.

Evelyn

They’re all too occupied in enjoying themselves.

Carol

But I don’t think they do, really.

Evelyn

That’s true, but they wouldn’t dare admit it.

Carol

Put the gramophone on.

Evelyn

Now?

Carol

Yes, please, or I shall cry again.

Evelyn

[Rising]

What shall we have?

Carol

Something blaring and noisy.

Evelyn

What a baby you are!

Carol

Am I? [He puts on a foxtrot and stands by the machine looking at her. After a pause she speaks.] I love this tune.

Evelyn

It’s not very new, I’m afraid. I must get some more of the latest ones.

Carol

Are you ready for your lesson?

Evelyn

Lesson?

Carol

Yes, your dancing lesson.

Evelyn

If you are.

Carol

Of course I am! Come on.

[She rises.]

Evelyn

I’ll push the table back. [He does so.] There.

Carol

Now then.

[They begin to dance.]

Evelyn

Is the time all right?

Carol

A scrap too fast.

Evelyn

Wait a minute.

[He stops for a second and regulates the time.]

Carol

That’s better.

[They dance again.]

Evelyn

I’m so sorry. Did I kick you?

Carol

No.

Evelyn

I warned you, didn’t I?

Carol

Hold me a little tighter.

Evelyn

All right.

[They dance in silence for a moment.]

Carol

This is divine.

Evelyn

You’re not teaching me a thing.

Carol

You don’t need it.

Evelyn