May 4.
Grinevka. (Evening.)
Yesterday there was a whole house full of guests: The Tsurikovs,
Mme. Ilinsky,[308] Stakhovich.
I have done nothing during the day.
In the morning I wrote a letter to Chertkov[309] and to S[310] and
to still some one else. The day before yesterday I was in Sidorovo
and at Serezha’s.[311]
In the morning I read Chertkov’s article.[312]
It is very good.
The 1st of May, Lindenberg[313] was here and a teacher[314] and they
went to Kamenka. On the 30th, I went to Gubarevka.
What hurts me, is that I seem to have lost entirely the capacity
for writing. To my shame I am indifferent. Latterly in my sleep, I
thought keenly about the contrast between the crushed people and
the crushers, but did not write it out.
To-day, yes and in the preceding days, it seemed to me that
Hadji
Murad became clear, but I could not write it. It is true they
interfered.
Thought:
1) Just as an athlete follows the growth of his muscles, so you ought
to follow the growth of love, or at least the decrease of evil and
lies—and life will be full and joyous.
2) Yesterday there was a discussion about the old question: what
is better—to take part in evil, to endeavour to diminish it (...)
or to keep away from it? The eternal objection is:—“There will be
anarchy”—yes, but now it is worse than anarchy: injustice.—“What,
then, if to begin everything from the beginning; the strong will
again offend the weak.” Yes, everything from the beginning again,
but with this difference, that while now we continue the cruelty and
injustice which have been established in heathen barbaric times, we
now live in the light of Christianity and the cruelty and injustice
will not be the same cruelty and injustice.... (It isn’t quite all
right, but it was.)
3) I look about me and the lines which I see I force into that
form which lives in my imagination. I see white on the horizon and
involuntarily I give this white the form of a church. Is it not in
this way that everything we see in this world takes on the form which
already lives in our imagination (consciousness), which we carried
over from our former life? (An idea.)
Exquisite weather. Friendly, hot Spring. I am at peace and am well.
May 5. Grinevka. If I live.
To-day May 9. Grinevka.
During these days we had visitors: Masha, Varia. I go every day
somewhere to open a soup-kitchen. I am not writing at all. I feel
weak. Yesterday there was a rain storm. I went to Bobrika. To-day I
went to Nicholskoe. I went to Gubarevka and returning through the
wood, thought.... I don’t feel like writing, later I shall write
out two thoughts, very important ones:
1) One, that I cannot put before me, that which tortured me before:
my destruction.
2) That the other life begins to attract me, only the process of
getting there is terrible. If only I could arrive safely, everything
there will be all right;
3) To-day I thought that the object of faith is only one—God. This
I must write out, explain.
To-day I am in a very weak state.
May 10. Grinevka. If I live.
To-day May 11.
Grinevka.
Yesterday I wrote a little on The Appeal.[315]
Then I went to
Mikhail’s Ford.
Saw Strakhov in my sleep,[316] who said to
me that I should write
out clearly, for the plain man, what God is. “You ought to write
it, Leo Nicholaievich,” (Tolstoi.)
To-day my stomach ached a little. I didn’t dine and wrote much on
The Appeal. It seems to be taking form. I am feeling fresh in the
head, a thing I haven’t felt for a long time. Thanks to my gymnastic
exercises, I have become convinced for the first time, that I am old
and weak and I must stop physical exercise entirely. This is even
pleasant.
I forgot for a moment, my rule, not to expect anything from others,
but to do what one ought to do oneself before God,—and there arose
in me an evil feeling.... But I remembered, asked in good faith what
was necessary and I felt better.
1) There is one object of faith—God, He who sent me. He who sent
me, He who is everything of which I feel myself to be a part. This
faith is indispensable and satisfying. If you have this faith then
there is no room for any other. Everything else is trust and not
faith. You can only have faith in that which undoubtedly is, but
which we cannot embrace with our reason.
2) Yesterday I thought that the form of thinking—categories—are
not seven but four: cause, matter, space, time. But only one:
movement, encloses everything in itself. Movement is
a change of
place, therefore there is space; change of place can be swifter
and slower, therefore there is time; and a preceding movement is a
cause, a following one, an effect; that which is displaced is matter.
Everything is movement. Man himself moves incessantly and therefore
everything explains itself to him by movement alone.
3) The most harmful effect of an evil act is that when a man
accomplishes it he frees himself from the demands of his conscience.
“We eat animals, therefore why not hunt?”—... and so you have no
need to stand on ceremony ... etc.
4) A strange thought came to me. Our whole life is in this, that we
consider ourselves a separate unit, an individual, a man. But besides
this being specialised, individualised, from all others, chemistry
discloses for us entirely different separate units, acids, nitrogen,
etc. They are separate and therefore they have life. (Nonsense.)
May 12. Grinevka. If I live.
To-day May 15. Morning. Grinevka.
Within these two days I went to Mtsensk,[317]
Kukuevka, and yesterday
to Batyevo.[318] Wrote
Hadji Murad unwillingly. I have exercised
again.[319] It is stupid, almost an insanity. Wrote a poor letter
to Posha. I am pleased with every one here.
Just now I have reread this journal and it did not leave me very
dissatisfied. Oh, if I would only remember more my transitory,
subservient condition here!
Have made no entries. My health would be good if my back weren’t
aching. Began to write letters. Not succeeding. One must wait
peacefully and live before God.
May 16. Grinevka. If I live.
To-day May 19. Grinevka.
Sonya was here. She arrived the 17th. This morning she went away.
I have been trying to write these two days. Can’t do anything. An
exceptional weakness and pain in my spinal column.
To-day May 20. Evening. Grinevka.
This morning I wrote rather much on The Appeal. In the evening I
wrote 13 letters. Went nowhere. My back is better. The main thing,
is that my brain is working and I am happy.
Received 500 roubles, and 1000 roubles are lying in Cherni.[320]
I am not going to write any more, although I have many notes.
To-day May 27. Grinevka. In the morning.
During this time I wrote The Appeal and finished the article on
the condition of the people.[321]
Just now I am writing to write out my notes—there is much that
has to be written out—that everything which is said in Paul
(Corinthians xiii) about love has to be said, and even more—about
the renunciation of oneself. It is impossible to lay up love within
oneself—but the renunciation of oneself is possible. It suffices
to renounce oneself and love will arise.
I thought this, because just now in the morning, I began to remember
all the difficulties which might arise from the distribution of
the contributions, about everything which had to be done for the
Dukhobors, for my own writing, and of which I had done nothing, and
about all my weaknesses, errors, about my joyless life with the
children, and such as I had not wanted it to be, and my lack of
consequence—and it sufficed only to negate myself, my own desires,
and immediately all wrong passed away, both of the past and the
future, and one thing remained, the need of service in the present.
How time vanishes remarkably in the consciousness of one’s mission.
To-day,
I think, June 12. Yasnaya Polyana.
I went with Sonya (my daughter-in-law)[322] to the Tsurikovs,
Aphremovs, and the Levitskys.[323] I have a very pleasant impression
and fell in love
with many; but fell ill and did not do my work and
made a lot of fuss both for Levitsky and the household.[324]...
It is four days since I arrived in Yasnaya and I am recovering
nicely. Wrote many letters.
I received almost 4,000 roubles, which I cannot use this year.[325]
Masha is here with her husband and Iliusha. The
Westerlunds were
here.[326]...
To-day, entirely unexpectedly, I began to finish Sergius.[327] No
news from England.[328]
I have made many notes.
1) I cannot remember now what and how I thought it: this is the
note: “You are often too strict with people, and he, poor man, is
good for nothing.”
2) Although I noted it before, I can’t help but repeat: ...
3) ...
4) The life of the world is one, i.e., in the sense that it is
impossible to apply the conception of number to it. Plurality
comes only from the partitions of consciousness. For a universal
consciousness there is no number, no plurality.
5) Non-resistance to evil is important not therefore only, because a
man has to act so for himself, for attaining the perfection of love,
but also because only non-resistance alone stops evil, localises it
in itself, neutralises it, does not permit it to go farther, as it
inevitably does, like the transmission of movement to elastic balls,
if there be no force which would absorb it. Active Christianity is
not in doing, creating Christianity, but in absorbing evil.
I feel very much like writing out the story, The Coupon.[329]
6) Death is the crossing-over from one consciousness to another, from
one image of the world to another. It is as if you go over from one
scene with its scenery to another. At the moment of crossing over,
it is evident that that what we consider real, is only an image,
because we are going over from one image into another. At the moment
of this crossing-over, there becomes evident, or at least one feels,
the most actual reality. Because of this, the moment of death is
important and dear.
7) For a universal consciousness, for God, matter does not exist.
Matter is only for beings, separated one from another. The limits
of separateness is that which we call matter, in all its infinite
forms.
8) It is impossible to remember sufficiently that the life of all
beings is continuous movement. Almost all our misery comes from the
fact that we do not know this or forget this. And imagining that
we do not go forward, but that we stand still, we grasp the beings
moving alongside of us—some going faster, some going slower than
we—we grasp them and hold on as long as the force of the movement
does not tear us away. And we suffer.
9) We are all rolling down a slope, going down lower and lower to
the plain. Every attempt to hold to one’s place, only makes the fall
bigger, the more you hold on.
10) We are sent to cross this sloping path, carrying across it that
light which is entrusted to us. And all that we can do—is to help
each other on the road to carry this light; but we hold back, pushing
each other down, extinguishing our light and that of the others.
(It isn’t good, not what I wanted to say.)
11) I know, that when people yawn in front of me, I can become
infected, and therefore I say to myself: I don’t want to yawn and
I won’t. I have learned to do this as to yawning, but I am only
beginning to learn this as to anger.
12) The sight depresses me strangely ... of those owning the land
and compelling the people to work. How my conscience is struck. And
this is not something reasoned, but a very strong feeling. Was I
wrong in not giving my land to the peasants? I don’t know.
13) Lieskov made use of my theme and badly.[330] I had an exquisite
thought—three problems: What was the most important time? what man?
and what act? The time is the immediate, this minute; the man—he
with whom you have immediate business; the act, to save your soul,
i.e., to do the act of love.[331]
14) It is impossible to save humanity from that deception in which
it is caught.... Only a religious feeling can give the counterstroke
and conquer.
June 13. Y. P. If I live.
June 14. Y. P. Evening.
Both days I wrote Father Sergius. It is coming out well. Wrote
letters. To-day there was a christening.[332]
I still cannot be fully good.... It is difficult, but I do not
despair.
To-day June 22. Y. P.
On the 16th I fell very ill.[333] I never had felt so weak and so near
death. I am ashamed to have made use of the care which they gave me.
I could do nothing. I only read and made some notes. To-day I am a
great deal better. Ukhtomsky[334] was pleased with my
article,[335]
but nevertheless he refused to print it. I telegraphed to Menshikov
that he should try the Viestnik Evropa
and the Russki Trud.[336]
I am afraid I am going to become tiresome.
The youth have been driven away. For they have forbidden that the
flour that was bought be sold.[337]
... Received a letter from Chertkov, a good one. The
Dieterichs
arrived.[338] Dear Dunaev
was here. They talked about the great riot
of the factory workers. I shall finish later.
To-day June 28. Y. P. Evening.
I am only now recovered, and am experiencing the joy of
convalescence. I feel nature very vividly, keenly, and have a
great clarity of thought.
I wrote a little on The Appeal. To-day I wrote Father Sergius
and both are good. Wrote many letters yesterday. All that I received
yesterday were unpleasant: from N, but principally from Gali, with
the news that they have all quarrelled.[339] Posha is going to Switzerland
and Boulanger to Bulgaria.
Tania went to Masha’s....
There is only one thing; one real thing that has been given us: to
live lovingly with one’s brothers, with every one. One must renounce
oneself. I wrote that to my friends and I am going to be strict with
myself.
Here is what I have written down....
I have just read up to this point, where everything that is difficult
can be made to vanish when you throw off the illusion of a personal
life, when
you recognise your mission in the service to God, and
that it would be good to experience this in physical suffering,
whether it will stand physical suffering. And here was a chance to
experience it and I forgot and did not experience it. It is too bad.
But the next time.
Have written down:
1) Paul Adam[340] gives the peasants a cruel characteristic,
especially the working men: they are vulgar, selfish, slaves,
fanatics—perhaps all this is just, but the one thing, that they
can live without us and we cannot live without them, wipes out
everything. And therefore it is not for us to judge. (Something is
wrong here.)
2) It is especially disagreeable for me when people who have lived
little and thought little, do not believe me, and not understanding
me, argue with me about moral problems. It would be the same for which
a veterinary surgeon would be hurt, if people who were not familiar
with his art were to argue with him. The difference is only in this,
that the art of the veterinary, the cook, the samovar-maker or any
kind of art or science, is recognised as an art or a science where
only those people are competent who have studied that realm; in the
matter of morality every one considers himself competent, because
every one has to justify his life. But life is justified only by
theories of morality. And every one makes them for himself.
3) I have often thought about falling in love, about the good, ideal
falling in love, which is exclusive of every sensuality, and I cannot
find either place or meaning for it. But its place and meaning is
very clear and definite: it is to lighten the struggle between sex
desire and chastity. Falling in love ought to be for a young man who
cannot keep to full chastity before marriage, and to release the
young men in the most critical years, from 16 to 20 or more, from
the torturing struggle. Here is the place for falling in love. But
when it breaks out in the life of people after marriage, it is out
of place and disgusting.
4) I am often asked for advice as to the problem of owning land. It
is my old custom to answer: that it is unsuitable for me to answer
such problems, just as it would be unsuitable for me to answer the
problem how to make use of the ownership or the labour or the rent
of a bonded serf.
5) People who stand on a lower moral plane or religious world point
of view cannot understand people standing on a higher plane. But
that there should be a possibility of union between them, there has
been given to people standing on a lower plane the instinct for the
good and a respect for this good. If there is not this instinct and
respect, then it is very bad. But in our society, among so-called
educated people, this is getting to be less and less.
To-day June 30. Y. P.
I am still ill, and very weak. But I think I am improving, and my
spiritual state is good. The day before yesterday I received a letter
about the quarrel in England.[341] I wrote to them. It is very sad
and very instructive. Yesterday I received a letter from Khilkov
with a letter from Miss Pickard about the Dukhobors.[342] I wrote
letters to Crosby, and Willard[343] and Khilkov. The affair of the
Dukhobors is important and big and evidently something will come
out of it which is entirely different from what we are preparing,
but it is God’s affair. To-day Mme. Annenkov arrived. Menshikov
telegraphed that Gaideburov[344] will print with omissions. During
these days I wrote Sergius—it isn’t good.
I am going to continue to write out the former:
6) ...
7) A man is a being separated from all others, who feels his limits.
Among the number of general limits by which he separates himself
from other beings, are his limits which are in common with that
being incomprehensible to him—the earth. Death is the destruction
of all the various common limits with other beings and always of the
common limit of the being of the earth—a fusion with earth. Every
sickness, wound, old age, is a destruction of these limits.
8) The work of life is to love. It is impossible to love expressly
those people unworthy of love; but it is possible not to love—to
behave well, in a good way, toward such people in every given moment.
9) I remembered keenly what a matter of enormous importance was
complete truthfulness in every detail, in everything, the avoidance
of all outer false forms. And I decided to keep to this. It is
never too late to mend.[345]
10) The minister said to the murderer: “Oh brother, don’t worry.
God has pardoned even greater sinners. But who are you? Don’t lose
heart. Pray.” The murderer burst into tears.
11) How great and stable seemed the happiness of the American people,
and how unstable it proved to be, like all happiness not founded
on life, according to the law of Christ. The Spanish-American War,
Jingoism.
12) I have often prayed (almost without believing, to try out) that
God arrange my life as I wish. To-day I simply prayed my customary
morning prayer and rather attentively. And after this prayer, I
recalled my wish and wanted to add a prayer about the fulfilment
of this wish, and tried to address God about it. And immediately I
realised my mistake—that it would be very much better if everything
was not according to
my will, but according to His. And without the
least effort and with joy I said: “Yes, let there not be my will,
but Thine.”
13) A spiritual life means that you should see the connection between
cause and effect in the spiritual world and that you be guided in
life by this connection. Materialists do not see this connection
and therefore do not take it as a guide for their acts, but they
take as a guide for their acts the physical, causal connection, the
one which is so complicated that we never fully know it, because
every effect is an effect of an effect; but the fundamental cause
of everything—is always spiritual. (Not clearly expressed, but
important).
14) Epictetus says this very thing when he reproaches people for
being very attentive to the phenomenon of the outer world—to that
which is not in our power and being inattentive to the phenomenon
of the inner, to that which is in our power.
15) To many it seems that if you exclude personality from life and a
love for it, then nothing will remain. It seems to them that without
personality there is no life. But this only appears so to people who
have not experienced self-renunciation. Throw off personality from
life, renounce it, and then there will remain that which makes the
essence of life—love.
16) (For The Appeal) ...
To-morrow, July 1st. If I live.
July 6.
Y. P.
Am entirely well. Yesterday I took leave of
Dunaev and Mme. Annenkov,
who were here. I live very badly. I cannot reconcile myself to the
will of God.
To-day I thought:
The life of Christ is very important as an instance of that
impossibility of man to see the fruits of his labours. And the less
so, the more important the work. Moses could enter into the promised
land with his people, but Christ could in no way see the fruit of
his teaching even if he had lived up to now. This is what one has
to learn. But we want to do the work of God and to receive human
reward.
July 17. Y. P. ’98. Morning.
There was nothing very special during these 11 days. I have decided
to give my novels away, Resurrection and Father Sergius, to be
printed for the Dukhobors.[346]
S. went to Kiev.
An inner struggle. I believe little in God. I do not rejoice at the
examination, but am burdened by it, admitting in advance that I
won’t pass. All last night I didn’t sleep. I rose early and prayed
much.
To-day the Dieterichs
and the Gorbunovs arrived. It was pleasant
with them. Took hold of Resurrection, and in the beginning it went
well, but from the moment when I became alarmed, these two days, I
have been unable to do anything. I took a very nice walk.
I wrote a letter to
Järnefelt[347]
and prepared a postscript. This
is the only important thing. But I haven’t the strength to withstand
the customary temptation.[348] Come and dwell within us. Awake the
resurrection in me!
I have made many notes. I will hardly have time to write them out now.
1) Brooding leads to dreams, dreams to passions, passion to devils.
(From Love for the Good.)[349]
2) The æsthetic pleasure which you receive from Nature is attainable
to all. Every one is affected by it differently, but it affects
every one. Art should have the same effect.
3) How difficult it is to really live for God alone. You think you
are living for God, but as soon as life jolts you, as soon as that
support in life to which you are holding on, fails you, then you
feel that there is no holding power in God and you fall.
4) For Father Sergius: Alone he is good, with people he falls.
5) What an obvious error: to live for worldly ends. Whenever the
purpose is not narrowly egotistic then this purpose is not quickly
attained in life. Moses did not enter the promised land and Christ
despaired of His labour: “Why hast Thou abandoned me?”...
6) There is no peace, either for him who lives for worldly ends
among people, or for him who lives for spiritual ends alone. There
is peace only then when a man lives for the service of God among
people.
To-day, July 20. Y. P.
A letter from S and from Masha. I still do not sleep, but things
are settling themselves in my soul, and as always, suffering is
of benefit. Yesterday I went to Ovsiannikovo, spoke with
Ivan
Ivanovich.[350] Yesterday I worked well on Resurrection.
It is morning now. I am not continuing to write out from the
notebooks, but I am going to write out what I—not being asleep—have
just now been thinking; it is an old but easily forgotten thing,
and an important one which should be also told to N with whom they
talked last night. Namely:
1) Life for oneself is a torture, because you want to live for an
illusion, for that which does not exist, and it not only cannot be
happy, but it cannot be at all. It is the same as dressing
and
feeding a shadow. Life exists only outside of oneself, in the service
of others, and not in the service of one’s near ones, beloved
ones—that is again for oneself—but in the service of those whom
we do not love, and better still, in the service of enemies. Help,
Father. The terrible error is that one confuses sex-love, love for
children, for friends, with love of people through God, of people
to whom you are indifferent, and still more of enemies, that is, of
erring people.
Aug.
3. Pirogovo.
Again everything is in the old way, again my life is horrid. I have
lived through very much; I haven’t passed the examination. But I do
not despair and I want a re-examination. I passed the examination
exceptionally badly, because I had the intention of going over to
another institution. It is just these thoughts one must throw away,
then one will learn better.
During this time Sonya returned and dear Tania Kuzminsky was here.
The work on Resurrection goes very badly, although it seems to me
I have thought it out much better. The 3rd day in Pirogovo. Uncle
Serezha[351]
is not as good as he was before: he is not in the mood.
Maria Nicholaievna.[352] For two days nothing has come into my head.
During this time there was alarming news about the condition
of the Dukhobors[353] and that Mme. M. N.
Rostovtzev was put in
prison.[354] For a long time there has been no letter from Chertkov.
Perhaps they intercept them.[355]
Am going to continue to write out that which I had not written out:
1) ...
2) There are two methods of human activity—and according to which
one of these two kinds of activity people mainly follow, are there
two kinds of people: one use their reason to learn what is good and
what is bad and they act according to this knowledge; the other act
as they want to and then they use their reason to prove that that
which they did was good and that which they didn’t do was bad.
3) It is absolutely clear that it is much more profitable to do
everything in common, but the reasoning about this is insufficient.
If the reasoning were sufficient then it would have happened long
ago. The fact that it is seen among Capitalists is unable to
convince people to live in common. Besides the reasoning that this
is profitable, it is necessary that the heart be ready to live like
that (that the world point of view should be such that it would
harmonise with the indications of the reason), but this is not so
and will not be so until the desires of the heart are changed, i.e.,
the world point of view of people.
4) Even if that which Marx predicted should happen, then the only
thing that will happen, is that despotism will be passed on. Now
the capitalists rule, but then the directors of the working people
will rule.
5) The mistake of the Marxists (and not only they, but the whole
materialistic school) lies in the fact that they do not see that the
life of humanity is moved by the growth of consciousness, by the
movement of religion, by an understanding of life becoming more and
more clear, general, meeting all problems and not by an economic
cause.
6) The most unthought thing, the error, of the theory of Marx is in
the supposition that capital will pass from the hands of private
people into the hands of the government, and from the government,
representing the people, into the hands of the workers....
7) There is nothing that softens the heart so much as the
consciousness of one’s guilt, and nothing hardens it so much as the
consciousness of one’s right.
8) Working people are so ... that it seems to them they have no
outlet. Salvation lies in truth, in preaching and professing it.
9) They prove the law of the conservation of energy; but energy is
nothing else than an abstract notion, just the same as matter. But
an abstract notion is always equal to itself. In fact, this
is
nothing else than as if we were to begin to prove that the law of
gravitation, notwithstanding seeming departures, exists unchangingly
in everything. (Unclear and perhaps untrue.)
10) The belief in miracles has for its basis the consciousness that
our world just as it is, is the product of our senses. But the error
lies only in supposing that the miraculous, that is, that something
which is against the laws of reason, when applied to our senses,
can happen for us with our tool of consciousness, i.e., with our
senses. That which is against our laws of reason, when applied to our
senses, can happen for other beings, for beings with other senses,
just as our tool of consciousness, our sense, is only one particular
instance from the innumerable quantity of other possibilities.
11) It is a great error to think that the reason of man is perfect
and can disclose everything to him. The limitation of reason is
best seen and most obvious from the fact that a man cannot solve
(he clearly sees that he cannot) the problems of infinity: for each
time there is still more time, for each space there is still more
space, for each number there is still a number, so that all time
and space is unknowable.
12) The reason of man is just as weak and insignificant in comparison
(and in an infinite number of times more so) with that which is, as
is the
reason (the means of perception) of a beetle and an amæba in
comparison with the reason of man. The reason of man in comparison,
not only with the highest reason, but with the reason which is higher
than his—is just the same as the understanding of a complicated
problem of higher mathematics or even of algebra for a man not knowing
mathematics, to whom it seems insoluble, as are the problems of the
infinity of space and time to us. While the problem is simple and
clear for one knowing mathematics. The difference is only in this,
that one can learn mathematics, but no study will help to solve the
problem of space and time. This is the limit of the possibility of
our knowledge under our reason.
13) I pray God that He release me from my suffering which tortures
me. But this suffering is sent to me by God in order to release
me from evil. The master whips his cattle with the whip in order to
drive them from the burning yard and save them, and the cattle pray
that he do not whip them.
14) There are common, sometimes intentional, sometimes unintentional,
misunderstandings of my opinions which I confess irritate me:
a) I say that God ... is not God and that God is that which alone
is—the unattainable good, the beginning of everything: against me
they say, that I deny God;
b) I say that one ought not to resist violence by violence: against
me they say, that I say it is not necessary to fight evil;
c) I say that one ought to strive towards chastity and that on this
road the highest grade will be virginity, and second a clean marriage,
the third not a clean, that is, not a monogamous marriage: against
me they say, that I deny marriage and I preach the destruction of
the human race.
d) I say that art is an infectious activity and that the more
infectious art is, the better it is. But that this activity be good
or bad, does not depend on how much it satisfies the demands of art,
i.e., its infectiousness, but on how much it satisfies the demands
of the religious consciousness, i.e., morality, conscience; against
me they say that I preach a tendence
art, etc.
15) Woman—and the legends say it also—is the tool of the devil.
She is generally stupid, but the devil lends her his brain when she
works for him. Here you see, she has done miracles of thinking,
far-sightedness, constancy, in order to do something nasty; but as
soon as something not nasty is needed, she cannot understand the
simplest thing; she cannot see farther than the present moment and
there is no self-control and no patience (except child-birth and
the care of children).
16)
All this concerns women, un-Christians, unchaste women, as are
all the women of our Christian
world. Oh, how I would like to show
to women all the significance of a chaste woman. A chaste woman (not
in vain is the legend of Mary) will save the world.
17) People are occupied with three things: 1) to feed themselves,
i.e., to continue their existence, 2) to multiply—to continue the
existence of the specie, and 3) to fulfil that for which they had
been sent in the world: to establish the kingdom of God. For this
there is one means—to perfect oneself. Almost all people are occupied
with the first two matters, forgetting the last, which at bottom is
the only real work.
18) The decline of the moral consciousness of humanity lies in the
greatest part of the people being placed in such a situation that
all interest in life for them is only to feed and to multiply. It
is just the same as if the master kept his cattle, caring only that
they be fed, or better, that they do not die from hunger and that
they multiply, and never received any income from them: no wool, or
milk, or work from them—from these cattle. The Master who sent us in
this world requires from us, besides existence and its continuation,
also the labour He needs.
19) For Resurrection. It was impossible to think and remember
one’s sin and be self-satisfied. But he had to be self-satisfied in
order to live, and therefore he did not think and forgot.
20) It is impossible to demand from woman that she valuate the feeling
of her exclusive love, on the basis of moral feeling. She cannot
do it, because she hasn’t got a real moral feeling, i.e., one that
stands higher than everything.
To-day I plan to go home.
Aug. 4. Y. P. If I live.
Why does the 4th of August come to my mind as if it were important?
Nothing important has happened.
To-day, August 24. Y. P.
During this time I received no letters from Chertkov and am very
perplexed.[356] I think that during this time the Dukhobors were
here. Letters from Khilkov, from Ivan
Michailovich. I answered them
all. To-day Sullerzhitsky arrived.[357] I am working all the time
on Resurrection and am pleased, even very much so. I am afraid of
shocks.
... And I feel well. A full house of people: Mashenka,[358]
Stakhovich, Vera Kuzminsky,[359] Vera Tolstoi.[360]
I am copying:
1) People were sent into the world to do the work of God, but they
quarrelled, fought and established things in such a way that for
some, there is no time to do the work, because they have
to feed
themselves, and for others there is no time, because they have to
guard that which they took away. What a waste of strength! It is
just as if workers had been sent to work and given food; some have
taken the food away and they have to guard it and the others have
to get food, and the work stands still.
2) People live in the world not fulfilling their mission—it is the
same way as if factory workers were only busied with how to lodge
themselves, feed themselves and amuse themselves.
3)
One of the most important tasks of humanity consists in the
bringing up of a chaste woman.
4) I often think that the world is such as it is, only because I
am so separated from all the rest. As soon as my separateness from
Everything will end, then the limits will be torn away and other
limits will be established—and then the world will become altogether
different for me.
5) You wish to serve humanity? Very well. That which you wish to
do, another will do. Are you satisfied? No, dissatisfied, because
the important thing for me is not what will be done, but what I
will do; that I do my work. This is the best proof that the matter
is not in the doing, but in the advancement towards the good.
Is it possible that I am advancing? Help, Lord.
6) How difficult it is to please people: some need one thing, others
another. They need both my past and my future. God is one, and His
Will in respect to me is one, and He wants only my present, what I
am doing this minute is what He wants. And what was, has been, and
what will be, isn’t my business.
7) Egoism, the whole egoistic life, is legitimate only as long as
reason has not awakened. As soon as it has awakened, then egoism is
lawful, only to that degree in which one has to sustain oneself as a
tool necessary for the service of people. The purpose of reason—is
the service to people. All the horror lies in its being used for
service to oneself.
8) Man gives himself to the illusion of egoism, lives for himself—and
he suffers. It suffices that he begin to live for others, and the
suffering becomes lighter and there is obtained the highest good in
the world: love of people.
9) As one disaccustoms oneself from smoking or other habits, so
one can and must disaccustom oneself from egoism. When you wish to
enlarge your pleasure, when you wish to exhibit yourself, when
you call forth love in others, stop. If you have nothing to do for
others, or you have no desire to do anything, then do nothing—only
don’t do anything for yourself.
10) The Bavarian told about their life. He boasts about the high
degree of freedom, but at the same time they have compulsory religious
teaching, a crude Catholic one. That is the most horrible despotism.
Worse than ours.
Aug. 25. Y. P. If I live.