The Sign of Joe Ball.

E


ED Colby, yer noted for yer stories What are marvelous, while thar true, And I know ye’ll relish a good one, So I will rercite it ter you.
A few nights ago I kinder crav’d for A small morsel of sassage meat, And, jist seizin’ my hat from the mantel, I hurri’d out inter the street.
At the shop of Joe Ball I diskiver’d Some what look’d superbly nice; The stamps war put down, and them sassages War mine at a nomernal price.
I carri’d them ter my house in triumph, Without gettin’ scratch’d in the least, And, sev’rin’ some, waited for daylight Ter enjoy a savory feast.
I war up with the crow of the rooster, And went for my sassages straight. I be gol durn’d if one wasn’t purrin’, And rubbin’ himself ’gin the gate!
Another had crawl’d ter the parlor, Whar he crouched down and purr’d, And wistfully watch’d a wire cage Whar slumber’d my favorite bird!
Two others I found in the coal cellar, Anxiously layin’ for rats: While another had her head in a pitcher Whar wife kept the milk for the cats!
I next look’d erbout for the balance, And, an oath I thar gave vent ter. Though thar tails war tied they war creepin’ Erway from a common center!
I survey’d ’em, and they look’d at me From out thar harf-closed eyes, As one of ’em told me that thar mother Had been chopp’d up inter pies.
The poor little orphans implor’d me Thar infantile lives ter spar’; But I had sich a feline mernagerie, That I flatly rerfus’d thar pra’r.
That mornin’ I miss’d my fav’rite rerpast Of fried sassages, ter be sure; But I had the satersfaction ter see The whole lot drown’d in the sewar!
Whenever ye see the sign of Joe Ball, Be car’ful not ter enter his lair, For he prides himself upon his choice stock Of kitten spic’d sassage and hair.

“THE TABLE,”

BARRY GRAY, Editor,

A MONTHLY MAGAZINE,

Devoted exclusively to subjects connected with the Pleasures of the Table, the Science of Cooking, and the Art of Good Living.

PLAN AND CHARACTER OF THE WORK.

The Table will contain short essays on Breakfasts, Dinners & Teas, Wines, Fruits & Confections.

It will have its Breakfast Table Chat, its Dinner Table Talk, and its Tea Table Gossip.

Housekeepers and Cooks will find in it recipes for the making of new, rare and savory dishes. A Bill of Fare, appropriate for the season, will appear in each number. Accounts of Public Banquets, Dinner Parties, etc., will be recorded in its pages.

The form of The Table will be a large octavo, twenty pages to each number.

TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION:

One Copy for One Year, $1.00
Single Copies, 10


M. DOOLADY, Publisher,
  98 Nassau Street.

A New, Revised, Corrected, and Illustrated Edition

OF THE

OLD MERCHANTS

OF

NEW-YORK CITY.

By WALTER BARRETT, Clerk.

In 3 Vols., Crown 8vo, Cloth Extra. Price, $7.50.

Of this work it is truly said “that no more interesting reading can be found for the growing MERCANTILE mind of the United States than a history of the LEADING MEN who have laid the foundations of the wealth and prosperity of its great METROPOLIS.”

“Valuable as a book of reference.”

THIS BOOK CAN NOT FAIL TO BE

INTERESTING TO EVERY BUSINESS MAN.

IT CONTAINS

UPWARD OF 2000 PROMINENT NAMES.

Agents wanted to Sell in all parts of the Country.

M. DOOLADY, Publisher,  

98 Nassau Street.

The most interesting and thrilling Book of the day.

PERILS OF THE PERIOD!

A THRILLING BOOK OF FACTS!

By JOSEPH HERTFORD.

Price, Paper, 50 cents; Cloth, $1.00.

CONTENTS.  
At Niblo’s by Gaslight.  Grace Church Morality.
In a Villain’s Toils.  Crime in Pantalets.
Temptations of Hotel Life.  Striking Pen Portraits.
A Bust for Ten Cents.  A Private Post-Office.
The Perils of Beauty.  The Amorous Epistle of a Judge.
A Meeting by Appointment.    A Woman in Man’s Attire.
Fashionable Society.  Fifth Avenue Belles.
From the Heights of Morality to the Rocks of Death.

These are some of the subjects and incidents treated in this startling record of facts. They are unpleasant examples of vice, error, and criminal guilt, leading souls from the pinnacle of morality to the degrading depths of sin and ruin; and a complete exposé of some of the pernicious characters which stalk through this great city by day and night alike. Fathers, Mothers, Brothers, all should read it.

Transcriber's Notes:

The cover image was created by the transcriber, and is in the public domain.

Uncertain or antiquated spellings or ancient words were not corrected.

Errors in punctuation and inconsistent hyphenation were not corrected unless otherwise noted.

Typographical errors have been silently corrected but other variations in spelling and punctuation remain unaltered.

In TOC, page no. for "Bob Munn of Cape Cod" was corrected from 14 to 16.