| “SHE WISHED ME TO SUGGEST SOMETHING FOR HER TO DO” | Frontispiece |
| “WHAT DIDN’T THEY SAY? THEY FLEW AT ME LIKE WILDCATS.” | 60 |
| “‘IT’S THE VAN ALSTYNE CREST,’ I SAID. ‘IT’S A PROOF OF RESPECTABILITY.’” | 86 |
| “RADIANT IN SILK, LACE, DIAMONDS, PEARLS, AND RUBIES” | 94 |
| “HARRY’S PET COLLIE HAD COME UP TO THE BACK DOOR WITH A HUMAN SKULL IN HIS MOUTH” | 148 |
| “HE LOOKED LIKE A MAN WITH A WOODEN LEG” | 188 |
A Christmas Tale
By
IRVING BACHELLER
| CHAPTER | PAGE | |
| I | Which Introduces the Shepherd of the Birds | 1 |
| II | The Founding of the Phyllistines | 18 |
| III | Which Tells of the Complaining Coin and the Man Who Lost His Self | 68 |
| IV | In Which Mr. Israel Sneed and Other Working Men Receive a Lesson in True Democracy | 91 |
| V | In Which J. Patterson Bing Buys a Necklace of Pearls | 103 |
| VI | In Which Hiram Blenkinsop Has a Number of Adventures | 117 |
| VII | In Which High Voltage Develops in the Conversation | 137 |
| VIII | In Which Judge Crooker Delivers a Few Opinions | 146 |
| IX | Which Tells of a Merry Christmas Day in the Little Cottage of the Widow Moran | 163 |
CONTENTS
BOOK ONE—IN WHICH THE ADVENTURES OF CRICKET PRESENTED, WITH SOME ACCOUNT OF HIM
ADVENTURE I—BEING THAT OF CRICKET AND THE CHILD GHOST
ADVENTURE II—BEING THAT OF CRICKET AND THE PEARL OF GREAT PRICE
ADVENTURE III.—BEING THAT OF THE BUNGWOOD COW
ADVENTURE IV—BEING THAT OF CRICKET AND THE PURPLE GHOST
ADVENTURE V—BEING THAT OF CRICKET AND THE HAND-MADE GENTLEMAN
ADVENTURE VI.—IN WHICH CRICKET HAS SUNDRY EXPERIENCES
ADVENTURE VII.—WHICH IS THAT OF CRICKET AND THE LOVER AND THE POTATO-SACK
ADVENTURE VIII.—IN WHICH CRICKET MEETS THE COLONEL AND THE YOUNG MISS
ADVENTURE IX.—WHICH DESCRIBES THE COERCION OF SAM AND HIS WEDDING
ADVENTURE X.—WHICH IS THE ADVENTURE OF CRICKET ON THE HEMPEN BRIDGE
ADVENTURE XI.—IN WHICH CRICKET MEETS THE HAND-MADE GENTLEMAN AND THE PEARL OF GREAT PRICE
BOOK TWO—IN WHICH CRICKET TAKES THE ROAD TO MANHOOD AND MEETS WITH SUNDRY MISHAPS
STAGE I.—IN WHICH CRICKET COMES TO A QUEER STOPPING-PLACE ON THE ROAD
STAGE II.—WHICH BRINGS CRICKET TO THE STATION OF REMORSE
STAGE III.—IN WHICH CRICKET PROCEEDS WITH HEAVIER BAGGAGE
STAGE IV.—IN WHICH CRICKET COMES TO A TURN IN THE ROAD
STAGE V.—IN WHICH CRICKET MOUNTS ONE OF GOD'S HORSES
STAGE VI.—MY LAST WEEK ON THE FLYING HORSE
STAGE VII.—IN WHICH MR. HERON ARRIVES AT THE SHOP OF THE HAND-MADE GENTLEMAN
STAGE VIII.—IN WHICH YOUNG MR. HERON COMES TO A TURN IN THE ROAD
STAGE IX.—IN WHICH WE MEET THE CAPTAIN OF THE NEW ARMY
STAGE X.—WHICH BRINGS MR. HERON TO A HIGH POINT IN THE ROAD
CHAPTER I.—THE SINGULAR BEGINNING OF A NEW CAREER
CHAPTER II.—IN WHICH PEARL'S OLD MARE BEGINS TO HURRY US ALONG
CHAPTER III.—THE GENTLEMAN DISCOVERS A NEW KIND OF POWER
CHAPTER IV.—IN WHICH WE MEET TWO GREAT MEN
CHAPTER V.—THE FIRST THROUGH CARS, AND THEIR BURDEN AND BAPTISM
CHAPTER VI.—THE FIRST BATTLE OF PEACE
CHAPTER VII,—MCCARTHY S FIRST BATTLE WITH SATAN
CHAPTER VIII.—IN WHICH WE TAKE SUPPER WITH THE FIRST CÆSAR OF THE CORPORATIONS
CHAPTER IX.—THE SECOND BATTLE OF PEACE
CHAPTER X.—THE CONTINUATION OF THE BATTLE
CHAPTER XI.—AN UNEXPECTED MEETING OF OLD FRIENDS
CHAPTER XII.—THE STORY OF AN UNSUSPECTED HERO
CONTENTS
I.—IN WHICH MR. POTTER PRESENTS THE SINGULAR DILEMMA OF WHITFIELD NORRIS, MULTIMILLIONAIRE
II.—MY INTERVIEW WITH THE PIRATE
III.—IN WHICH A MAN IS SEEN HOLDING DOWN THE BUSHEL THAT HIDES HIS LIGHT
IV.—A RATHER SWIFT ADVENTURE WITH THE PIRATE
V.—IN WHICH WE HAVE AN AMUSING VOYAGE
VI.—WE ARRIVE IN THE LAND OF LOVE AND SONG
VII.—IN WHICH I TEACH THE DIFFICULT ART OF BEING AN AMERICAN IN ITALY
VIII.—I AGREE TO FIGHT A DUEL AND NAME A WEAPON WITH WHICH EUROPEAN GENTLEMEN ARE UNFAMILIAR
IX.—A MODERN AMERICAN MARRYER ENTERS THE SCENE
X.—A DAY OF ADVENTURES WITH TUSCAN ARTISTS AND OTHERS
XI.—IN WHICH WE GET INTO THE FLASH AND GLITTER OF HIGH LIFE
XII.—IN WHICH NORRIS TAKES HIS LIGHT FROM UNDER THE BUSHEL
XIII.—IN WHICH I FIGHT A DUEL WITH ONE OF THE OLDEST WEAPONS IN THE WORLD
XIV.—MISS GWENDOLYN DEFINES HER POSITION
XV.—SOMETHING HAPPENS TO THE MAN MUGGS
CONTENTS
CONTENTS
CHAPTER I.—WHICH OPENS FIRE ON THE EXACTING INDUSTRY OF SUPERING
CHAPTER II.—WHICH TEACHES THAT ONE SHOULD NEVER HITCH HIS CONSCIENCE TO
CHAPTER III.—WHICH PRESENTS THE STORY OF THE SMOTHERED SON
CHAPTER IV.—WHICH HANDS OUT SOME SOME COMMON TO THE SUPERERS IN AMERICA
CHAPTER V. WHICH DROPS A FEW ROUNDS OF SHRAPNEL ON THE HUNS IN AMERICA
CHAPTER VI.—WHICH IS MOSTLY FOR THE BOYS OF OUR ARMY
CONTENTS
EBEN HOLDEN'. LAST DAY A-FISHING
CONTENTS
BALLAD OF THE SABRE CROSS AND 7