The preceding chapter, in a measure, exhibits the attainments the Chinese have reached in the comforts and elegances of living. These terms, as tests of civilization, however, are so comparative that it is rather difficult to define them; for the notions which an Englishman, an Egyptian, and a Chinese severally might have of comfort and elegance in the furniture and arrangement of their houses are almost as unlike as their languages. If Fisher’s Views of China be taken as a guide, one can easily believe that the Chinese need little from abroad to better their condition in these particulars; while if one listen to the descriptions of some persons who have resided among them, it will be concluded that they possess neither comfort in their houses, civility in their manners, nor cleanliness in their persons. In passing to an account of their social life, this variety of tastes should not be overlooked; and if some points appear objectionable when taken alone, a little further examination will, perhaps, show that they form part of a system which requires complete reconstruction before it could be happily and safely altered.

The observations of a foreigner upon Chinese society are likely to be modified by his own feelings, and the way in which he has been treated by natives there; but their behavior to him might be very unlike what would be deemed good breeding among themselves. If a Chinese feared or expected something from a foreigner, he would act toward him more politely than if the contrary were the case; on the one hand better, on the other worse, than he would toward one of his own countrymen in like circumstances. In doing so, it may be remarked with regret that he would only imitate the conduct of a host of foreigners who visit China, and whose coarse remarks, rude actions, and general supercilious conduct toward the natives ill comport with their superior civilization and assumed advantages. One who looked at the matter reasonably would not expect much true politeness among a people whose conceit and ignorance, selfishness and hauteur, were nearly equal; nor be surprised to find the intercourse between the extremes of society present a strange mixture of brutality and commiseration, formality and disdain. The separation of the sexes modifies and debases the amusements, even of the most moral, leads the men to spend their time in gambling, devote it to the pleasures of the table, or dawdle it away when the demands of business, study, or labor do not arouse them. Political parties, which exert so powerful an influence upon the conduct of men in Christian countries, leading them to unite and communicate with each other for the purpose of watching or resisting the acts of government, do not exist; and where there is a general want of confidence, such institutions as insurance companies, savings or deposit banks, corporate bodies to build a railroad or factory, and associations of any kind in which persons unite their funds and efforts to accomplish an object, are not to be expected; they do not exist in China, nor did they in Rome or ancient Europe. Nor will any one expect to hear that literary societies or voluntary philanthropic associations are common. These, as they are now found in the west, are the products of Christianity alone, and we must wait for the planting of the tree before looking for its fruit. The legal profession, as distinct from the possession of office, is not an occupation in which learned men can obtain an honorable livelihood; the priesthood is confined to monasteries and temples, and its members do not enter into society; while the practice of medicine is so entirely empirical and strange that the few experienced practitioners are not enough to redeem the class. These three professions, which elsewhere do so much to elevate society and guide public opinion, being wanting, educated men have no stimulus to draw them out into independent action. The competition for literary degrees and official rank, the eager pursuit of trade, or the dull routine of mechanical and agricultural labor, form the leading avocations of the Chinese people. Unacquainted with the intellectual enjoyments found in books and the conversation of learned men, and having no educated taste, as we understand that term (while, too, he cannot find such a thing as virtuous female society), the Chinese resorts to the dice-box, the opium-pipe, or the brothel for his pleasures, though even there with a loss of character among his peers.

The separation of the sexes has many bad results, only partially compensated by some conservative ones. Woman owes her present elevation at the west to Christianity, not only in the degree of respect, support, freedom from servile labor, and education which she receives, but also in the reflex influences she exerts of a purifying, harmonizing, and elevating character. Where the requirements of the Gospel exert no force, her rights are more or less disregarded, and if she become as debased as the men, she can exert little good influence even upon her own family, still less upon the community. General mixed society can never be maintained with pleasure unless the better parts of human nature have the acknowledged preëminence, and where she, who imparts to it all its gracefulness and purity, is herself uneducated, unpolished, and immodest, the common sense of mankind sees its impropriety. By advocating the partition of the sexes, legislators and moralists in China have acted as they best could in the circumstances of the case, and by preventing the evils beyond their remedy, provided the best safeguards they could against general corruption. In her own domestic circle a Chinese female, in the character and duties of daughter, wife, or mother, finds as much employment, and probably as many enjoyments, as the nature of her training has fitted her for. She does not hold her proper place in society simply because she has never been taught its duties or exercised its privileges.

In ordinary cases the male and female branches of a household are strictly kept apart; not only the servants, but even brothers and sisters do not freely associate after the boys commence their studies. At this period of life, or even earlier, an anxious task devolves upon parents, which is to find suitable partners for their children. Betrothment is entirely in their hands, and is conducted through the medium of a class of persons called mei-jin, or go-betweens, who are expected to be well acquainted with the character and circumstances of the parties. Mothers sometimes contract their unborn progeny on the sole contingency of a difference of sex, but the usual age of forming these engagements is ten, twelve, or older, experience having shown that the casualties attending it render an earlier period undesirable.

There are six ceremonies which constitute a regular marriage, though their details vary much in different parts of the Empire: 1. The father and elder brother of the young man send a go-between to the father and brother of the girl, to inquire her name and the moment of her birth, that the horoscope of the two may be examined, in order to ascertain whether the proposed alliance will be a happy one. 2. If the eight characters[370] seem to augur aright, the boy’s friends send the mei-jin back to make an offer of marriage. 3. If that be accepted, the second party is again requested to return an assent in writing. 4. Presents are then sent to the girl’s parents according to the means of the parties. 5. The go-between requests them to choose a lucky day for the wedding. 6. The preliminaries are concluded by the bridegroom going or sending a party of friends with music to bring his bride to his own house. The match-makers contrive to multiply their visits and prolong the negotiations, when the parties are rich, to serve their own ends.

In Fuhkien parents often send pledges to each other when their children are mere infants, and registers containing their names and particulars of nativity are exchanged in testimony of the contract. After this has been done it is impossible to retract the engagement, unless one of the parties becomes a leper or is disabled. When the children are espoused older, the boy sometimes accompanies the go-between and the party carrying the presents to the house of his future mother-in-law, and receives from her some trifling articles, as melon-seeds, fruits, etc., which he distributes to those around. Among the presents sent to the girl are fruits, money, vermicelli, and a ham, of which she gives a morsel to each one of the party, and sends its foot back. These articles are neatly arranged, and the party bringing them is received with a salute of fire-crackers.

From the time of engagement until marriage a young lady is required to maintain the strictest seclusion. Whenever friends call upon her parents she is expected to retire to the inner apartments, and in all her actions and words guard her conduct with careful solicitude. She must use a close sedan whenever she visits her relations, and in her intercourse with her brothers and the domestics in the household maintain great reserve. Instead of having any opportunity to form those friendships and acquaintances with her own sex which among ourselves become a source of so much pleasure at the time and advantage in after life, the Chinese maiden is confined to the circle of her relations and her immediate neighbors. She has few of the pleasing remembrances and associations that are usually connected with school-day life, nor has she often the ability or opportunity to correspond by letter with girls of her own age. Seclusion at this time of life, and the custom of crippling the feet, combine to confine women in the house almost as much as the strictest laws against their appearing abroad; for in girlhood, as they know only a few persons except relatives, and can make very few acquaintances after marriage, their circle of friends contracts rather than enlarges as life goes on. This privacy impels girls to learn as much of the world as they can, and among the rich their curiosity is gratified through maid-servants, match-makers, pedlers, visitors, and others. Curiosity also stimulates young ladies to learn something of the character and appearance of their intended husbands, but the rules of society are too strict for young persons to endeavor to form a personal attachment, though it is not impossible for them to see each other if they wish, and there are, no doubt, many contracts suggested to parents by their children.

The office of match-maker is considered honorable, and both men and women are employed to conduct nuptial negotiations. Great confidence is reposed in their judgment and veracity, and as their employment depends somewhat upon their tact and character, they have every inducement to act with strict propriety in their intercourse with families. The father of the girl employs their services in collecting the sum agreed upon in the contract, which, in ordinary circumstances, varies from twenty-five to forty dollars, increasing to a hundred and over according to the condition of the bridegroom; until that is paid the marriage does not take place. The presents sent at betrothment are sometimes costly, consisting of silks, rice, cloths, fruits, etc.; the bride brings no dower, but both parents frequently go to expenses they can ill afford when celebrating the nuptials of their children, as the pride of family stimulates each party to make undue display.

The principal formalities of a marriage are everywhere the same, but local customs are observed in some regions which are quite unknown and appear singular elsewhere. In Fuhkien, when the lucky day for the wedding comes, the guests assemble in the bridegroom’s house to celebrate it, where also sedans, a band of music, and porters are in readiness. The courier, who acts as guide to the chair-bearers, takes the lead, and in order to prevent the onset of malicious demons lurking by the road, a baked hog or large piece of pork is carried in front, that the procession may safely pass while these hungry souls are devouring the meat. Meanwhile the bride arrays herself in her best dress and richest jewels. Her girlish tresses have already been bound up, and her hair arranged by a matron, with due formality; an ornamental and complicated head-dress made of rich materials, not unlike a helmet or corona, often forms part of her coiffure. Her person is nearly covered by a large mantle, over which is an enormous hat like an umbrella, that descends to the shoulders and shades the whole figure. Thus attired she takes her seat in the red gilt marriage sedan, called hwa kiao, borne by four men, in which she is completely concealed. This is locked by her mother or some other relative, and the key given to one of the bridemen, who hands it to the bridegroom or his representative on reaching his house.

The procession is now rearranged, with the addition of as many red boxes and trays to contain the wardrobe, kitchen utensils, and the feast, as the means of the family or the extent of her paraphernalia require. As the procession approaches the bridegroom’s house the courier hastens forward to announce its coming, whereupon the music strikes up, and fire-crackers salute her until she enters the gate. As she approaches the door the bridegroom conceals himself, but the go-between brings forward a young child to salute her, while going to seek the closeted bridegroom. He approaches with becoming gravity and opens the sedan to hand out his bride, she still retaining the hat and mantle; they approach the ancestral tablet, which they reverence with three bows, and then seat themselves at a table upon which are two cups of spirits. The go-between serves them, though the bride can only make the motions of drinking, as the large hat completely covers her face. They soon retire into a chamber, where the husband takes the hat and mantle from his wife, and sees her, perhaps, for the first time in his life. After he has considered her for some time, the guests and friends enter the room to survey her, when each one is allowed to express an opinion; the criticisms of the women are severest, perhaps because they remember the time they stood in her unpleasant position. This cruel examination being over, she is introduced to her husband’s parents, and then salutes her own. Such are some of the customs among the Fuhkienese. Other usages followed in marriages and betrothals have been carefully described by Doolittle, with particular reference to the same people, and by Archdeacon John H. Gray, alluding to other parts of the Empire.[371]

The bridegroom, previous to the wedding, receives a new name or “style,” and is formally capped by his father in presence of his friends, as an introduction to manhood. He invites the guests, sending two red cakes with each invitation, and to him each guest, a few days before the marriage, returns a present or a sum of money worth about ten or fifteen cents, nominally equal to the expenses he will be considered as occasioning. Another invitation is sent the day after to a feast, and the bride also calls on the ladies who attended her wedding, from whom she receives a ring or some other article of small value. The gentlemen also make the bridegroom a present of a pair of lanterns to hang at his gateway. On the night of the wedding they sometimes endeavor to get into the house when the pair is supposed to be asleep, in order to carry off some article, which the bridegroom must ransom at their price.

Among the poor the expenses of a wedding are much lessened by purchasing a young girl, whom the parents bring up as a daughter until she is marriageable, and in this way secure her services in the household. A girl already affianced is for a like reason sometimes sent to the boy’s parents, that they may support her. In small villages the people call upon a newly married couple near the next full moon, when they are received standing near the bedside. The men enter first and pay their respects to the bride, while her husband calls the attention of his visitors to her charms, praises her little feet, her beautiful hands, and other features, and then accompanies them into the hall, where they are regaled with refreshments. After the men have retired the women enter and make their remarks upon the lady, whose future character depends a good deal upon the manner in which she conducts herself. If she shows good temper, her reputation is made. Many a prudent woman on this occasion says not a word, but suffers herself to be examined in silence in order that she may run no risk of offending.[372] Far different is this introduction to married life from the bridal tour and cordial greetings of friends which ladies receive in western lands during the honeymoon!

The bridal procession is a peculiar feature of Chinese social life. It varies in its style, nature of the ornaments, and the whole get-up in all parts of the land, but is always as showy as the means of the parties will allow. It is composed of bearers of lanterns and official tablets, musicians, relatives of the bride and groom and their personal friends, framed stands with roofs carried on thills to hold the bride’s effects, all centering around her sedan. In Peking such a procession will sometimes be stretched out half a mile, and the sedan borne by a dozen or more bearers. The coolies are dressed in red, and they and their burdens are usually provided by special shopmen, who purvey on such occasions. The tablets of literary rank held by members of the family, wooden dragons’ heads, titular lanterns, and other official insignia are borne in state, an evidence of its high standing. In some places an old man, elegantly dressed, heads the procession, bearing a large umbrella to hold over the bride when she enters and leaves her sedan; behind him come bearers with lanterns, one of which carries the inscription, “The phœnixes sing harmoniously.” To these succeed the music and the honorary tablets, titular flags, state umbrella, etc., and two stout men as executioners dressed in a fantastic manner, wearing long feathers in their caps, and lictors, chain-bearers, and other emblems of office. Parties of young lads, prettily dressed and playing on drums, gongs, and flutes, or carrying lanterns and banners, occasionally form a pleasing variety in the train, which is continued by the trays and covered tables containing the bride’s trousseau, and ended with the sedan containing herself.

The ceremonies attending her reception at her husband’s house are not uniform. In some parts she is lifted out of the sedan, over a pan of charcoal placed in the court, and carried into the bed-chamber; in other places she enters and leaves her sedan on rugs spread for her use, and walks into the chamber. After a brief interval she returns into the hall, bearing a tray of betel-nut for the guests, and then worships a pair of geese brought in the train with her husband, this bird being an emblem of conjugal affection. On returning to her chamber the bridegroom follows her and takes off the red veil, after which they pledge each other in wine, the cups being joined by a thread. While there a matron who has borne several children to one husband comes in to pronounce a blessing upon them and make up the nuptial bed. The assembled guests then sit down to the feast and ply the sin lang, ‘new man’ or bridegroom, pretty well with liquor; the Chinese on such occasions do not, however, often overpass the rules of sobriety. The sin fujin, ‘new lady’ or bride, and her mother-in-law also attend to those of her own sex who are present in other apartments, but among the poor a pleasanter sight is now and then seen in all the guests sitting at one table.

In the morning the pair worship the ancestral tablets and salute all the members of the family; among the poor this important ceremony occurs very soon after the pair have exchanged their wine-cups. The pledging of the bride and groom in a cup of wine, and their worship of the ancestral tablets and of heaven and earth, are the important ceremonies of a wedding after the procession has reached the house. Marriages are celebrated at all hours, though twilight and evening are preferred; the spring season, or the last month in the year, are regarded as the most felicitous nuptial periods. From the way in which the whole matter is conducted there is some room for deception by sending another person in the sedan than the one betrothed, or the man may mistake the name of the girl he wishes to marry. Mr. Smith mentions one of his acquaintances, who, having been captivated with a girl he saw in the street, sent a go-between with proposals to her parents, which were accepted; but he was deeply mortified on receiving his bride to find that he had mistaken the number of his charmer, and had received the fifth daughter instead of the fourth.

The Chinese do not marry another woman with these observances while the first one is living, but they may bring home concubines with no other formality than a contract with her parents, though it is considered somewhat discreditable for a man to take another bedfellow if his wife have borne him sons, unless he can afford each of them a separate establishment. It is not unfrequent for a man to secure a maid-servant in the family with the consent of his wife by purchasing her for a concubine, especially if his occupation frequently call him away from home, in which case he takes her as his travelling companion and leaves his wife in charge of the household. The fact that the sons of a concubine are considered as legally belonging to the wife induces parents to betroth their daughters early, and thus prevent their entering a man’s family in this inferior capacity. The Chinese are sensible of the evils of a divided household, and the laws place its control in the hands of the wife. If she have no sons of her own, she looks out for a likely boy among her clansmen to adopt, knowing that otherwise her husband will probably bring a concubine into the family. It is difficult even to guess at the extent of polygamy, for no statistics have been or can be easily taken. Among the laboring classes it is rare to find more than one woman to one man, but tradesmen, official persons, landholders, and those in easy circumstances frequently take one or more concubines; perhaps two-fifths of such families have them. Show and fashion lead some to increase the number of their women, though aware of the discord likely to arise, for they fully believe their own proverb, that “nine women out of ten are jealous.” Yet it is probably true that polygamy finds its greatest support from the women themselves. The wife seeks to increase her own position by getting more women into the house to relieve her own work and humor her fancies. The Chinese illustrate the relation by comparing the wife to the moon and the concubines to the stars, both of which in their appropriate spheres wait upon and revolve around the sun.

If regard be had to the civilization of the Chinese and their opportunities for moral training, the legal provisions of the code to protect females in their acknowledged rights and punish crimes against the peace and purity of the family relation reflect credit upon their legislators. In these laws the obligation of children to fulfil the contract made by their parents is enforced, even to the annulling of an agreement made by a son himself in ignorance of the arrangements of his parents. The position of the tsí, or wife taken by the prescribed formalities, and that of the tsieh, or women purchased as concubines, are accurately defined, and the degradation of the former or elevation of the latter so as to interchange their places, or the taking of a second tsí, are all illegal and void. The relation between the two is more like that which existed between Sarah and Hagar in Abraham’s household, or Zilpah and Bilhah and their mistresses in Jacob’s, than that indicated by our terms first and second wife, of which idea the Chinese words contain no trace. The degrees of unlawful marriages are comprehensive, extending even to the prohibition of persons having the same sing, or family name, and to two brothers marrying sisters. The laws forbid the marriage of a brother’s widow, of a father’s or grandfather’s wife, or a father’s sister, under the penalty of death; and the like punishment is inflicted upon whoever seizes the wife or daughter of a freeman and carries them away to marry them.

These regulations not only put honor upon marriage, but render it more common among the Chinese than almost any other people, thereby preventing a vast train of evils. The tendency of unrestrained desire to throw down the barriers to the gratification of lust must not be lost sight of; and as no laws on this subject can be effectual unless the common sense of a people approve of them, the Chinese, by separating the sexes in general society, have removed a principal provocation to sin, and by compelling young men to fulfil the marriage contracts of their parents have also provided a safeguard against debauchery at the age when youth is most tempted to indulge, and when indulgence would most strongly disincline them to marry at all. They have, moreover, provided for the undoubted succession of the inheritance by disallowing more than one wife, and yet have granted men the liberty they would otherwise take, and which immemorial usage in Asiatic countries has sanctioned. They have done as well as they could in regulating a difficult matter, and better, on the whole, perhaps, than in most other unchristianized countries. If any one supposes, however, that because these laws exist sins against the seventh commandment are uncommon in China, he will be as mistaken as those who infer that because the Chinese are pagans nothing like modesty, purity, or affection exists between the sexes.

When a girl “spills the tea”—that is, loses her betrothed by death—public opinion honors her if she refuse a second engagement; and instances are cited of young ladies committing suicide rather than contract a second marriage. They sometimes leave their father’s house and live with the parents of their affianced husband as if they had been really widows. It is considered derogatory for widows to marry; though it may be that the instances quoted in books with so much praise only indicate how rare the practice is in reality. The widow is occasionally sold for a concubine by her father-in-law, and the grief and contumely of her degradation is enhanced by separation from her children, whom she can no longer retain. Such cases are, however, not common, for the impulses of maternal affection are too strong to be thus trifled with, and widows usually look to their friends for support, or to their own exertions if their children be still young; they are assisted, too, by their relatives in this laudable industry and care. It is a lasting stigma to a son to neglect the comfort and support of his widowed mother. A widower is not restrained by any laws, and weds one of his concubines or whomsoever he chooses; nor is he expected to defer the nuptials for any period of mourning for his first wife.

The seven legal reasons for divorce, viz., barrenness, lasciviousness, jealousy, talkativeness, thievery, disobedience to her husband’s parents, or leprosy, are almost nullified by the single provision that a woman cannot be put away whose parents are not living to receive her back again. Parties can separate on mutual disagreement, but the code does not regulate the alimony; and a husband is liable to punishment if he retain a wife convicted of adultery. If a wife merely elopes she can be sold by her husband, but if she marry while absent she is to be strangled; if the husband be absent three years a woman must state her case to the magistrates before presuming to re-marry.

In regard to the general condition of females in China the remark of De Guignes is applicable, that “though their lot is less happy than that of their sisters in Europe, their ignorance of a better state renders their present or prospective one more supportable; happiness does not always consist in absolute enjoyment, but in the idea which we have formed of it.”[373] She does not feel that any injustice is done her by depriving her of the right of assent as to whom her partner shall be; her wishes and her knowledge go no farther than her domestic circle, and where she has been trained in her mother’s apartments to the various duties and accomplishments of her sex, her removal to a husband’s house brings to her no great change.

This, however, is not always the case, and the power accorded to the husband over his wife and family is often used with great tyranny. The young wife finds in her new home little of the sympathy and love her sisters in Christian lands receive. Her mother-in-law is not unfrequently the source of her greatest trials, and demands from her both the submission of a child and the labor of a slave, which is not seldom returned by disobedience and bitter revilings. If the husband interfere she has less likelihood of escaping his exactions; though in the lower walks of life his cruelty is restrained by fear of losing her and her services, and in the upper diverted by indifference as to what she does, in the pursuit of other objects. If the wife behave well till she herself becomes a mother and a mother-in-law, then the tables are turned; from being a menial she becomes almost a goddess. Luhchau, a writer on female culture, mentions the following indirect mode of reproving a mother-in-law: “Loh Yang travelled seven years to improve himself, during which time his wife diligently served her mother-in-law and supported her son at school. The poultry from a neighbor’s house once wandered into her garden, and her mother-in-law stole and killed them for eating. When she sat down to table and saw the fowls she would not dine, but burst into tears, at which the old lady was much surprised and asked the reason. ‘I am much distressed that I am so poor and cannot afford to supply you with all I wish I could, and that I should have caused you to eat flesh belonging to another.’ Her parent was affected by this, and threw away the dish.”

The evils attending early betrothment induce many parents to defer engaging their daughters until they are grown, and a husband of similar tastes can be found; for even if the condition of the families in the interval of betrothment and marriage unsuitably change, or the lad grows up to be a dissipated, worthless, or cruel man, totally unworthy of the girl, still the contract must be fulfilled, and the worst party generally is most anxious for it. The unhappy bride in such cases often escapes from her present sufferings and dismal prospects by suicide. A case occurred in Canton in 1833 where a young wife, visiting her parents shortly after marriage, so feelingly described her sufferings at the hands of a cruel husband to her sisters and friends that she and three of her auditors joined their hands together and drowned themselves in a pond, she to escape present misery and they to avoid its future possibility. Another young lady, having heard of the worthless character of her intended, carried a bag of money with her in the sedan, and when they retired after the ceremonies were over thus addressed him: “Touch me not; I am resolved to abandon the world and become a nun. I shall this night cut off my hair. I have saved $200, which I give you; with the half you can purchase a concubine, and with the rest enter on some trade. Be not lazy and thriftless. Hereafter, remember me.” Saying this, she cut off her hair, and her husband and his kindred, fearing suicide if they opposed her, acquiesced, and she returned to her father’s house.[374] Such cases are common enough to show the dark side of family life, and young ladies implore their parents to rescue them in this or some other way from the sad fate which awaits them. Sometimes girls become skilled in female accomplishments to recommend themselves to their husbands, and their disappointment is the greater when they find him to be a brutal, depraved tyrant. A melancholy instance of this occurred in Canton in 1840, which ended in the wife committing suicide. Her brother had been a scholar of one of the American missionaries, and took a commendable pride in showing specimens of his sister’s exquisite embroidery, and not a few of her attainments in writing, which indicated their reciprocal attachment. The contrary happens too, sometimes, where the husband finds himself compelled to wed a woman totally unable to appreciate or share his pursuits, but he has means of alleviating or avoiding such misalliances which the weaker vessel has not. On the whole, as we have said, one must admit that woman holds a fairly high position in China. If she suffers from the brutality of her husband, the tyranny of her mother-in-law, or the overwork of household, field, or loom, she is as often herself blameworthy for indolence, shiftlessness, gadding, and bad temper. The instances which are given by Gray[375] in his account of marital atrocities prove the length to which a man will wreak his rage on the helpless; but they are the exception to the general testimony of the people themselves. So far as general purity of society goes, one may well doubt whether such abominable conduct as is legalized among Mormons in Utah is any improvement on the hardships of woman among the Chinese.

Pursuing this brief account of the social life of the Chinese, the right of parents in managing their children comes into notice. It is great, though not unlimited, and in allowing them very extensive power, legislators have supposed that natural affection of the parents, a desire to continue the honorable succession of the family, together with the influence of proper education, were as good securities against paternal cruelty and neglect as any laws which could be made. Fathers give their sons the ju ming, or ‘milk name,’ about a month after birth. The mother, on the day appointed for this ceremony, worships and thanks the goddess of Mercy, and the boy, dressed and having his head shaved, is brought into the circle of assembled friends, where the father confers the name and celebrates the occasion by a feast. The milk name is kept until the lad enters school, at which time the shu ming, or ‘school name,’ is conferred upon him, as already mentioned. The shu ming generally consists of two characters, selected with reference to the boy’s condition, prospects, studies, or some other event connected with him; sometimes the milk name is continued, as the family have become accustomed to it. Such names as Ink-grinder, Promising-study, Opening-olive, Entering-virtue, Rising-advancement, etc., are given to young students at this time. Though endearing or fanciful names are often conferred, it is quite as common to vilify very young children by calling them dog, hog, puppy, flea, etc., under the idea that such epithets will ward off the evil eye. Girls have only their milk and marriage names; the former may be a flower, a sister, a gem, or such like; the latter are terms like Emulating the Moon, Orchis Flower, the Jasmine, Delicate Perfume, etc. A mere number at Canton, as A-yat, A-sam, A-luk (No. 1, No. 3, No. 6), often designates the boys till they get their book names.[376]

The personal names of the Chinese are written contrariwise to our own, the sing, or surname, coming first, then the ming, or given name, and then the complimentary title; as Liang Wăntai siensăng, where Liang, or ‘Millet,’ is the family name, Wăntai, or ‘Terrace of Letters,’ the given name, and siensăng, Mr. (i.e., Master), or ‘Teacher.’ A few of the surnames are double, as Sz’ma Tsien, where Sz’ma is the family name and Tsien the official title. A curious idea prevails among the people of Canton, that foreigners have no surname, which, as Pliny thought of the inhabitants of Mt. Atlas, they regard as one of the proofs of their barbarism; perhaps this notion came by inference from the fact that the Manchus write only their given name, as Kíshen, Kíying, Ílípu, etc. When writing Chinese names in translations and elsewhere, some attention should be paid to these particulars; the names of Chinese persons and places are constantly appearing in print under forms as singular as would be Williamhenryharrison, Rich-Ard-Ox-Ford, or Phila Delphia-city in English. The name being in a different language, and its true nature unknown to most of those who write it, accounts for the misarrangement.

In Canton and its vicinity the names of people are abbreviated in conversation to one character, and an A prefixed to it;—as Tsinteh, called A-teh or A-tsin. In Amoy the A is placed after, as Chin-a; in the northern provinces no such usage is known. Some families, perhaps in imitation of the imperial precedent, distinguish their members from others in the clan by adopting a constant character for the first one in the ming, or given name; thus a family of brothers will be named Lin Tung-pei, Lin Tung-fung, Lin Tung-peh, where the word Tung distinguishes this sept of the clan Lin from all others. There are no characters exclusively appropriated to proper names or different sexes, as George, Agnes, etc., all being chosen out of the language with reference to their meanings. Consequently, a name is sometimes felt to be incongruous, as Naomi, when saluted on her return to Bethlehem, felt its inappropriateness to her altered condition, and suggested a change to Mara. Puns on names and sobriquets are common, from the constant contrast of the sounds of the characters with circumstances suggesting a comparison or a play upon their meanings; sly jokes are also played when writing the names of foreigners, by choosing such characters as will make a ridiculous meaning when read according to their sense and not their sound.

When a man marries he adopts a third name, called tsz’, or ‘style,’ by which he is usually known through life; this is either entirely new or combined from previous names. When a girl is married her family name becomes her given name, and the given name is disused, her husband’s name becoming her family name. Thus Wa Salah married to Wei San-wei drops the Salah, and is called Wei Wa shí, i.e., Mrs. Wei [born of the clan] Wa, though her husband or near relatives sometimes retain it as a trivial address. A man is frequently known by another compellation, called pieh tsz’, or ‘second style,’ which the public do not presume to employ. When a young man is successful in attaining a degree, or enters an office, he takes a title called kwan ming, or ‘official name,’ by which he is known to government. The members or heads of licensed mercantile companies each have an official name, which is entered in their permit, from whence it is called among foreigners their chop name. Each of the heads of the co-hong formerly licensed to trade with foreigners at Canton had such an official name. Besides these various names, old men of fifty, shopkeepers, and others take a hao, or ‘designation;’ tradesmen use it on their signboards as the name of their shop, and not unfrequently receive it as their personal appellation. Of this nature are the appellations of the tradesmen who deal with foreigners, as Cutshing, Chanlung, Linchong, etc., which are none of them the names of the shopmen, but the designation of the shop. It is the usual way in Canton for foreigners to go into a shop and ask “Is Mr. Wanglik in?” which would be almost like one in New York inquiring if Mr. Alhambra or Mr. Atlantic-House was at home, though it does not sound quite so ridiculous to a Chinese. The names taken by shopkeepers allude to trade or its prospects, such as Mutual Advantage, Obedient Profit, Extensive Harmony, Rising Goodness, Great Completeness, etc.; the names of the partners as such are not employed to form the firm. Besides this use of the hao, it is also employed as a brand upon goods; the terms Hoyuen, Kinghing, Yuenkí, meaning ‘Harmonious Springs,’ ‘Cheering Prospects,’ ‘Fountain’s Memorial,’ etc., are applied to particular parcels of tea, silk, or other goods, just as brands are placed on lots of wine, flour, or pork. This is called tsz’-hao, or ‘mark-designation,’ but foreigners call both it and the goods it denotes a chop.

When a man dies he receives another and last, though not necessarily a new name in the hall of ancestors; upon emperors and empresses are bestowed new ones, as Benevolent, Pious, Discreet, etc., by which they are worshipped and referred to in history, as that designation which is most likely to be permanent.

In their common intercourse the Chinese are not more formal than is considered to be well-bred in Europe; it is on extraordinary or official occasions that they observe the precise etiquette for which they are famous. The proper mode of behavior toward all classes is perhaps more carefully inculcated upon youth than it is in the west, and habit renders easy what custom demands. The ceremonial obeisance of a court or a levee, or the salutations proper for a festival, are not carried into the everyday intercourse of life; for as one chief end of the formalities prescribed for such times is to teach due subordination among persons of different rank, they are in a measure laid aside with the robes which suggested them. True politeness, exhibited in an unaffected regard for the feelings of others, cannot, we know, be taught by rules; but a great degree of urbanity and kindness is everywhere shown, whether owing to the naturally placable disposition of the people or to the effects of their early instruction in the forms of politeness. Whether in the crowded and narrow thoroughfares, the village green, the market, the jostling ferry, or the thronged procession—wherever the people are assembled promiscuously, good humor and courtesy are observable; and when altercations do arise wounds or serious injuries seldom ensue, although from the furious clamor one would imagine that half the crowd were in danger of their lives.

Chinese ceremonial requires superiors to be honored according to their station and age, and equals to depreciate themselves while lauding those they address. The Emperor, considering himself as the representative of divine power, exacts the same prostration which is paid the gods; and the ceremonies which are performed in his presence partake, therefore, of a religious character, and are not merely particular forms of etiquette, which may be altered according to circumstances. There are eight gradations of obeisance, commencing with “the lowest form of respect, called kung shao, which is merely joining the hands and raising them before the breast. The next is tso yih, bowing low with the hands thus joined. The third is ta tsien, bending the knee as if about to kneel; and kwei, an actual kneeling, is the fourth. The fifth is ko tao (kotow), kneeling and striking the head on the ground, which when thrice repeated makes the sixth, called san kao, or ‘thrice knocking.’ The seventh is the luh kao, or kneeling and knocking the head thrice upon the ground, then standing upright and again kneeling and knocking the head three times more. The climax is closed by the san kwei kiu kao, or thrice kneeling and nine times knocking the head. Some of the gods of China are entitled to the san kao, others to the luh kao, while the Emperor and Heaven are worshipped by the last. The family now on the throne consider this last form as expressing in the strongest manner the submission and homage of one state to another.”[377] The extreme submission which the Emperor demands is partaken by and transferred to his officers of every grade in a greater or less degree; the observance of these forms is deemed, therefore, of great importance, and a refusal to render them is considered to be nearly equivalent to a rejection of their authority.

Minute regulations for the times and modes of official intercourse are made and promulgated by the Board of Rites, and to learn and practise them is one indispensable part of official duty. In court the master of ceremonies stands in a conspicuous place, and with a loud voice commands the courtiers to rise and kneel, stand or march, just as an orderly sergeant directs the drill of recruits. The same attention to the ritual is observed in their mutual intercourse, for however much an inferior may desire to dispense with the ceremony, his superior will not fail to exact it. In the salutations of entrée and exit among officers these forms are particularly conspicuous, but when well acquainted with each other, and in moments of conviviality, they are in a great measure laid aside; but the juxtaposition of art and nature among them, at one moment laughing and joking, and the next bowing and kneeling to each other as if they had never met, sometimes produces amusing scenes to a foreigner. The entire ignorance and disregard of these forms by foreigners unacquainted with the code leaves a worse impression upon the natives at times, who ascribe such rudeness to hauteur and contempt.