MARRIAGE CUSTOMS

There were formerly two ways by means of which a young Torres Straits islander might find favour in the eyes of a girl—the one was skill in dancing, the other was the possession of a trophy of one or more human skulls as a token of personal bravery or prowess in war.

During the numerous and prolonged dances of former days, the young women watched the active movements of the capering youths, admired their glossy skin, their frizzly hair, their numerous gay ornaments, and took delight in their wonderful activity; and well they might, for a shapely, bronze-skinned savage is a vastly superior animal to a civilised male dancing at a ball. Pre-eminence had its reward, for, as the former chief of Mabuiag put it—“In England, if a man has plenty of money, women want to marry him; so here, if a man dances well, they want him too.”

Amongst the western islanders it was customary for the young women to propose to the men. I obtained the following description of the way in which this affair was managed in Mabuiag. When a man was fancied by a girl she made a string armlet, and gave it to the man’s sister or to some confidential person. On a suitable opportunity presenting itself, the confidante said to the young man, “I’ve got some string for you.” Knowing what was meant, he replied, “Show it to me.” He then learnt the girl’s name and received her message. If the man was favourably inclined he accepted, and wore the tiapururu and sent the girl two leglets.

The girl next sent some food to the young man of her choice; he did not eat it, but gave it to his relations to eat, for, as he said, “perhaps woman he gammon.” His parents also advised him not to eat the food, and his mother warned him, “You look after that armlet good, suppose you lose it, girl he wild.”

The young woman again sent food, possibly the man might want to eat it, but the mother said, “Not so, or by-and-by you will get an eruption over your face and body.” At all events, the relations preached caution so as to make sure that the girl was not playing false. Perhaps the young man might wait for a month, or even longer, before precipitating affairs. He also informed his parents that he was in no hurry to leave the old home, and that he did not wish to make them sorry by his absence.

While the young man, who was certainly a prudent lover, was thus “lying low,” the food was coming in all the time, and as regularly he gave it to his mother. After a time the latter said, “When will you go and take her?” He then consulted his immediate relatives, and said, “Suppose you tell me to take her—I take her.” All being agreeable, the “big men” of the village were consulted, and they gave their consent. One day a friend would engage the young man in conversation, and the girl, who had been previously informed that the happy moment had now arrived, quietly came behind the unsuspecting youth and gently pushed some cooked food in front of him. He turned round sharply, and to his shame-faced confusion he saw his sweetheart and fully realised the delicate situation. His friends assured him that it was all right, saying, “Good thing, you take her now.” They were then man and wife. This part of the proceedings required no further ceremony.

After marriage an exchange of presents and food was made between the relatives of the two parties concerned, but the bridegroom’s relations gave a great deal more than those of the bride. The bridegroom stood on a mat, and all the presents from his side of the house were heaped upon it. The bride took these presents and handed them over to her people. The bridegroom gave his father-in-law a present of perhaps a canoe, or a dugong harpoon, or something of equal value. This was the final transaction, but should the marriage result in the usual adjuncts to family life, a payment had to be paid to the wife’s parents on the birth of each child.

Without going into details of custom of every island, it may not be amiss if I transcribe the account given me by my friend Maino of Warrior Island. Here again the ring of string was a preliminary feature, and the sister, in giving it to her brother, said, “Brother, I’ve got some good news for you; a woman likes you.” He asked who it was, and after some conversation—if he was willing to go on with the affair—he told his sister to ask the girl to go into the bush and he would follow.

When the message was delivered, the enamoured damsel informed her parents that she was going into the bush to get some food, or wood, or make some similar excuse. In due course the man met the girl, and they sat down and talked discreetly over their affairs. Any forward conduct on the part of the young man would have been regarded as bad form.

Breaking the embarrassing silence, the youth considerately asked, “You like me proper?”

“Yes,” she replied, “I like you proper, with my heart inside. Eye along my heart see you. You my man.”

Unwilling to give himself away rashly, he further inquired, “How you like me?”

“I like your fine leg; you got fine body, your skin good, I like you altogether,” replied the girl.

Anxious to clinch the matter, the girl asked when they were to be married. “To-morrow, if you like,” said the man, and they both went home and informed their respective relatives that they had arrived at an understanding. Then the girl’s friends fought the man’s people, “for girl more big,” i.e. of more consequence, than boy; but the fighting did not appear to have been a serious business.

It was certainly the custom for a young man, or rather for his elders, to give a girl to the “brother” of the bride; the girl being either his own sister or a relative, who, according to their scheme of kinship, bears a similar relationship. The “brother” may similarly not be an own brother. This “swapping” of “sisters” was the usual method of getting a wife. If a young man had no “sister” he might for ever remain unmarried unless he was rich enough to purchase a wife.

After marriage the husband usually left his own people and went to live with those of his wife, even if they belonged to a different island. There is, for example, considerable intermarriage between the inhabitants of the islands of Badu and Mabuiag; in such a case the man divides his time between the two islands. It should be remembered that both the husband and the wife own land in their respective islands, and both properties require to be cultivated and looked after. Still this is not a complete explanation of the custom. From this and other facts it would appear that these western islanders are emerging from what is usually called a “matriarchal” to a “patriarchal” system.

The husband had complete control over his wife; she was his property, for he had paid for her. In spite of the wife having asked her husband to marry her, he could kill her should she cause trouble in the house, and that without any penal consequence to himself. The payment of a husband to his wife’s father gave him all rights over her, and at the same time annulled those of her father or of her family.

A rich man might have several wives, but the wife first married was chief; she was “master” over the others, and issued orders to the last married wife who conveyed the same to the intermediate wives. If the wives would not work or were inattentive to the commands of the first wife, the husband was laughed at by his friends and told he should not have so many wives. The wives all lived together.

A man might divorce his wife, in which case she returned to her parents. Incompatibility of temper was the common cause for such a step. The husband had no control over a divorced wife, who might marry again; but the new husband would have to pay the old one, and he would share the purchase goods with the woman’s parents. In the case of divorce the father kept the children, but he might allow the mother temporarily to retain one, or even more, especially if they were very young.

One day during my former visit to Mabuiag there was a wedding; a widow with a baby boy had proposed to and been accepted by a young man from the island of Badu. The ceremony commenced at 7 a.m. with a full ordinary service in the church, which lasted over an hour. When this was concluded a messenger was sent to me, and I repaired to the church to witness the marriage. The bride and bridegroom were seated among their friends in different parts of the church, and on their names being called, they met and stood up in front of the Communion table. After they had repeated certain sentences and a charge had been given by the teacher, the bride and bridegroom again retired to their former places.

At the conclusion of the ceremony a Church Meeting was held, which the bridegroom attended, and afterwards he went out dugong fishing with his friends to furnish the wedding feast. They were in luck that day, as they caught three dugong and two turtle. In the meantime I called on the bride and gave her a looking-glass, and left some tobacco for her husband. Following the usual custom, the man remained in Mabuiag and lived with his wife’s people.

About the same time a native girl, who was employed as cook by the chief of the island, repeatedly asked a Loyalty Islander, Charley Lifu by name, to marry her; but he did not wish to marry a Mabuiag woman, as he would in that case have to remain permanently on the island, and he wanted to return to the South Seas. At last they arranged to have a talk in the bush to settle matters finally. The man was obdurate; and the girl was so chagrined that when she returned to the village she accused Charley of attempting to “steal” her, hoping that he would thus be forced to marry her in restitution. This caused considerable excitement, as Charley Lifu was the brother of the teacher’s wife. The matter came before the chief in his capacity as judge, and after long deliberation on the part of the “old men,” it was decided that the charge was unfounded, and was merely trumped up by the girl, who thus over-reached herself. I believe this was a true bill, as Charley Lifu was the gentlest and most obliging of my numerous coloured friends—a man who, I believe, would not do anyone an injury, and who would even perform a friendly act without waiting for the ordinary douceur of tobacco, but he was an incorrigible loafer.

The custom of a girl proposing marriage to a young man did not commend itself to the traditions of the missionaries, and they have tried to stop it, though I did not discover that it was necessarily at all an objectionable arrangement. It has certain definite advantages, and I was certainly given to understand that properly brought-up young men behaved with becoming bashfulness, and showed due deference to the wishes of their parents or elders.

The remarkable change that has come over the natives owing to the influence of missionary teaching is well exemplified in the fact that the girls frequently propose marriage to the men by writing; sometimes this is done by means of a letter, but I have known of a school slate being employed and sent to the young man.

I managed to secure one or two examples of such love-letters. The two first were written for me by Peter when I asked him what had occurred in his own case. They purport to be Magena’s proposal and his acceptance; both of them are natives of Mabuiag. The following is a transcription and literal translation:—

The following is Peter’s own translation of these letters:—

One informant gave the following as a typical letter of proposal from a girl to a man. Ray has kindly literally translated this for me. I also add the native’s version of it.

The answer might be—

Another proposal is a copy of an original letter which happened to fall into my hands and which I still possess. It was from a Murray Islander named Kimel, who was then in Mabuiag offering marriage to Anuni, a Mabuiag girl.

Unfortunately I did not see her reply; but I know she received this letter, and I have no reason to believe my possession of it hindered the course of true love from running smoothly.

It is interesting to note that Kimel, being a Murray Islander, followed his tribal custom of the man proposing marriage.

STAR MYTHS

Most, perhaps all, peoples recognise certain groups of stars, or constellations, about which they tell stories. As a rule these myths of origin are not particularly instructive, except for the sidelight they cast on the people who originated them.

The constellations themselves have a very definite and practical value, as they constitute the universal sidereal almanack, by means of which the majority of primitive peoples regulate their farming operations or their festivals.

The Torres Straits islanders are no exception to this general rule, and I offer the following three myths as examples of this kind of traditional literature.

The Murray Islanders recognise a large constellation which does not coincide with any one of those mapped by our astronomers, though the canoe corresponds to part of our Scorpio.

A man named Tagai, with uplifted and outstretched hands bearing a spear, is supposed to stand upon a canoe, which is represented by the bowed row of stars that forms the scorpion’s tail. Below the front end of the canoe is a single star, the anchor of the canoe, and near its other end is a red star that represents a man named Kareg. A cluster of stars is called Usiam, and another linear constellation is named Seg.

Tagai is an important constellation, not only as an indication of the approach of certain seasons, but also for navigation purposes. For example, I was told, “Usiam he mĕk [that is, “sign” or “mark”] for new yams.” “Seg he mĕk next kind of yam.” When Usiam is some way from the horizon at sundown, men say, “Close up new yam time,” and when it is at the horizon at sunset, “Yam time he come.”

“Tagai he mĕk for turtle season. Two hand he come first; all turtle go to islands to leeward (to the west), and they (the natives) ‘kaikai’ (eat) turtle first. By-and-by face belong Tagai he come up; Dauarle (the inhabitants of Dauar and of the southern end of Murray Island) get turtle, and then all the rest of Murray Island.”

In sailing by night from Erub (Darnley Island) to Mer (Murray Island) they steer for the left hand of Tagai, “right hand he stop outside Mer.”

The following is the reputed origin of the constellation. I give it in my informant’s own words:—

The next story, which was told to me in Mabuiag in 1888, refers to two constellations, one of which, a Dorgai, a sort of bogey, is followed by a cluster of stars named Bu, but which we call Delphin, or the dolphin, and certainly this cluster has a closer resemblance to the large Fusus or Triton shell (bu) than to a dolphin. The Dorgai corresponds to the star known to us as Altair, but which they call gamu (the body), and the adjoining stars on each side, which they name getal (the arms).

These constellations belong to the north-west monsoon, and when “Dorgai he come up (from the east) that time make kap (dance).”

The last story is one which was given to me by my friend Mr. Robert Bruce, who lives at Daru.

It is the story of Kabi, a man who did not believe in much talking nor in accepting as true everything that people said; but he thought for himself, and tried to find out the truth, even if he had to make a long journey to do so. He was what we call a “scientific man.”