By
Robert C. Benchley
Illustrated By
Gluyas Williams
Printed October, 1922
They look him over as if he were a fresh air child being given a day's outing.
They look him over as if he were a fresh air child being given a day's outing.
The author thanks the editors of the following publications for their permission to print the articles in this book: Life, The New York World, The New York Tribune, The Detroit Athletic Club News, and The Consolidated Press Association.
They look him over as if he were a fresh air child being given a day's outing.
The watcher walks around the table, giving each hand a careful scrutiny.
"'Round and 'round the tree I go"
"Atta boy, forty-nine: Only one more to go!"
For three hours there is a great deal of screaming.
He was further aided by the breaks of the game.
Mrs. Deemster didn't enter into the spirit of the thing at all.
"That's right," says the chairman.
"If you weren't asleep what were you doing with your eyes closed?"
You would gladly change places with the most lawless of God's creatures.
I am mortified to discover that the unpleasant looking man is none other than myself.
"I can remember you when you were that high"
She would turn away and bite her lip.
"Listen Ed! This is how it goes!"
I thank them and walk in to the nearest dining-room table.
"Why didn't you tell us that you were reading a paper on birth control?"