ACT V.
Scene I. A churchyard.
Enter two Clowns, with spades, &c.[1962]
First Clo. Is she to be buried in Christian burial that[1963][1964]
wilfully seeks her own salvation?
Sec. Clo. I tell thee she is; and therefore make her[1965][1966]
grave straight: the crowner hath sat on her, and finds it
Christian burial. 5
First Clo. How can that be, unless she drowned herself[1963][1967]
in her own defence?
Sec. Clo. Why, 'tis found so.[1965]
First Clo. It must be 'se offendendo;' it cannot be else.[1968]
For here lies the point: if I drown myself wittingly, it argues 10
an act: and an act hath three branches; it is, to act, to[1969]
do, and to perform: argal, she drowned herself wittingly.[1970]
Sec. Clo. Nay, but hear you, goodman delver.[1971]
First Clo. Give me leave. Here lies the water; good:[1972]
here stands the man; good: if the man go to this water and[1973] 15
drown himself, it is, will he, nill he, he goes; mark you[1974]
that; but if the water come to him and drown him, he[1975]
drowns not himself: argal, he that is not guilty of his own
death shortens not his own life.
Sec. Clo. But is this law? 20
First Clo. Ay, marry, is't; crowner's quest law.
Sec. Clo. Will you ha' the truth on't? If this had not[1976]
been a gentlewoman, she should have been buried out o'[1977]
Christian burial.
First Clo. Why, there thou say'st: and the more pity that[1978] 25
great folk should have countenance in this world to drown
or hang themselves, more than their even Christian. Come,[1979]
my spade. There is no ancient gentlemen but gardeners,[1980]
ditchers and grave-makers: they hold up Adam's profession.
Sec. Clo. Was he a gentleman? 30
First Clo. A' was the first that ever bore arms.[1981]
Sec. Clo. Why, he had none.[1982]
First Clo. What, art a heathen? How dost thou understand[1982][1983]
the Scripture? The Scripture says Adam digged:[1982]
could he dig without arms? I'll put another question[1982] 35
to thee: if thou answerest me not to the purpose, confess[1984]
thyself—[1985]
Sec. Clo. Go to.
First Clo. What is he that builds stronger than either
the mason, the shipwright, or the carpenter? 40
Sec. Clo. The gallows-maker; for that frame outlives a[1986]
thousand tenants.
First Clo. I like thy wit well, in good faith: the gallows
does well; but how does it well? it does well to those that
do ill: now, thou dost ill to say the gallows is built stronger 45
than the church: argal, the gallows may do well to thee.
To't again, come.
Sec. Clo. 'Who builds stronger than a mason, a shipwright,
or a carpenter?'[1987]
First Clo. Ay, tell me that, and unyoke. 50
Sec. Clo. Marry, now I can tell.
First Clo. To't.
Sec. Clo. Mass, I cannot tell.
Enter Hamlet and Horatio, afar off.[1988]
First Clo. Cudgel thy brains no more about it, for your
dull ass will not mend his pace with beating, and when 55
you are asked this question next, say 'a grave-maker:' the
houses that he makes last till doomsday. Go, get thee to[1989][1990]
Yaughan; fetch me a stoup of liquor. [Exit Sec. Clown.[1990][1991]
[He digs, and sings.
In youth, when I did love, did love,
Methought it was very sweet, 60
To contract, O, the time, for-a my behove,[1992]
O, methought, there-a was nothing-a meet.[1993]
Ham. Has this fellow no feeling of his business, that[1994][1995]
he sings at grave-making?[1995]
Hor. Custom hath made it in him a property of easiness.[1996] 65
Ham. 'Tis e'en so: the hand of little employment hath
the daintier sense.[1997]
[Throws up a skull.
Ham. That skull had a tongue in it, and could sing
once: how the knave jowls it to the ground, as if it were[2003]
Cain's jaw-bone, that did the first murder! It might be[2004] 75
the pate of a politician, which this ass now o'er-reaches;[2005]
one that would circumvent God, might it not?[2006]
Hor. It might, my lord.
Ham. Or of a courtier, which could say 'Good morrow,
sweet lord! How dost thou, sweet lord?' This might[2007] 80
be my lord such-a-one, that praised my lord such-a-one's[2008]
horse, when he meant to beg it; might it not?[2009]
Hor. Ay, my lord.
Ham. Why, e'en so: and now my Lady Worm's;[2010]
chapless, and knocked about the mazzard with a sexton's[2011] 85
spade: here's fine revolution, an we had the trick to see't.[2012]
Did these bones cost no more the breeding, but to play at
loggats with 'em? mine ache to think on't.[2013]
First Clo. [Sings] A pick-axe, and a spade, a spade,[1998]
For and a shrouding sheet:[2014] 90
O, a pit of clay for to be made
For such a guest is meet.
[Throws up another skull.[2015]
Ham. There's another: why may not that be the skull[2016]
of a lawyer? Where be his quiddities now, his quillets, his[2017]
cases, his tenures, and his tricks? why does he suffer this 95
rude knave now to knock him about the sconce with a dirty[2018]
shovel, and will not tell him of his action of battery? Hum![2019]
This fellow might be in 's time a great buyer of land, with
his statutes, his recognizances, his fines, his double vouchers,
his recoveries: is this the fine of his fines and the recovery[2020] 100
of his recoveries, to have his fine pate full of fine dirt? will[2020][2021]
his vouchers vouch him no more of his purchases, and double[2022][2023]
ones too, than the length and breadth of a pair of indentures?[2023]
The very conveyances of his lands will hardly lie in[2024]
this box; and must the inheritor himself have no more, ha? 105
Hor. Not a jot more, my lord.
Ham. Is not parchment made of sheep-skins?
Hor. Ay, my lord, and of calf-skins too.[2025]
Ham. They are sheep and calves which seek out assurance[2026]
in that. I will speak to this fellow. Whose grave's 110
this, sirrah?[2027]
Ham. I think it be thine indeed, for thou liest in't.[2031] 115
First Clo. You lie out on't, sir, and therefore 'tis not[2032]
yours: for my part, I do not lie in't, and yet it is mine.[2033]
Ham. Thou dost lie in't, to be in't and say it is thine:
'tis for the dead, not for the quick; therefore thou liest.
First Clo. 'Tis a quick lie, sir; 'twill away again, from[2034] 120
me to you.
Ham. What man dost thou dig it for?
First Clo. For no man, sir.
Ham. What woman then?
First Clo. For none, neither. 125
Ham. Who is to be buried in 't?
First Clo. One that was a woman, sir; but, rest her
soul, she's dead.
Ham. How absolute the knave is! we must speak by
the card, or equivocation will undo us. By the Lord,[2035] 130
Horatio, this three years I have taken note of it; the age[2036]
is grown so picked that the toe of the peasant comes so[2037]
near the heel of the courtier, he galls his kibe. How long[2038]
hast thou been a grave-maker?[2039]
First Clo. Of all the days i' the year, I came to't that[2040] 135
day that our last king Hamlet o'ercame Fortinbras.[2041]
Ham. How long is that since?
First Clo. Cannot you tell that? every fool can tell
that: it was that very day that young Hamlet was born;[2042]
he that is mad, and sent into England.[2043] 140
Ham. Ay, marry, why was he sent into England?
First Clo. Why, because a' was mad: a' shall recover[2044]
his wits there; or, if a' do not, 'tis no great matter there.[2044][2045]
Ham. Why?
First Clo. 'Twill not be seen in him there; there the[2046] 145
men are as mad as he.[2046]
Ham. How came he mad?
First Clo. Very strangely, they say.
Ham. How 'strangely'?
First Clo. Faith, e'en with losing his wits. 150
Ham. Upon what ground?
First Clo. Why, here in Denmark: I have been sexton[2047]
here, man and boy, thirty years.[2048]
Ham. How long will a man lie i' the earth ere he rot?
First Clo. I'faith, if a' be not rotten before a' die—as[2049][2050] 155
we have many pocky corses now-a-days, that will scarce[2051]
hold the laying in—a' will last you some eight year or nine[2051]
year: a tanner will last you nine year.[2052]
Ham. Why he more than another?
First Clo. Why, sir, his hide is so tanned with his trade[2053] 160
that a' will keep out water a great while; and your water is[2054]
a sore decayer of your whoreson dead body. Here's a skull[2055]
now: this skull has lain in the earth three and twenty years.[2055][2056]
Ham. Whose was it?
First Clo. A whoreson mad fellow's it was: whose do[2057] 165
you think it was?[2057]
Ham. Nay, I know not.
First Clo. A pestilence on him for a mad rogue! a'[2058]
poured a flagon of Rhenish on my head once. This same[2059]
skull, sir, was Yorick's skull, the king's jester.[2059][2060] 170
Ham. This?
First Clo. E'en that.
Ham. Let me see. [Takes the skull.] Alas, poor[2061]
Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of
most excellent fancy: he hath borne me on his back a[2062] 175
thousand times; and now how abhorred in my imagination[2063][2064]
it is! my gorge rises at it. Here hung those lips that I[2064]
have kissed I know not how oft. Where be your gibes
now? your gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,[2065]
that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one[2066] 180
now, to mock your own grinning? quite chop-fallen? Now[2067]
get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let her paint[2068]
an inch thick, to this favour she must come; make her[2069]
laugh at that. Prithee, Horatio, tell me one thing.
Hor. What's that, my lord? 185
Ham. Dost thou think Alexander looked o' this fashion[2070]
i' the earth?
Hor. E'en so.
Ham. And smelt so? pah! [Puts down the skull.[2071]
Hor. E'en so, my lord. 190
Ham. To what base uses we may return, Horatio![2072]
Why may not imagination trace the noble dust of Alexander,
till he find it stopping a bung-hole?[2073]
Hor. 'Twere to consider too curiously, to consider so.
Ham. No, faith, not a jot; but to follow him thither[2074] 195
with modesty enough and likelihood to lead it: as thus:[2075]
Alexander died, Alexander was buried, Alexander returneth[2076]
into dust; the dust is earth; of earth we make loam;[2077]
and why of that loam, whereto he was converted, might[2078]
they not stop a beer-barrel? 200
Imperious Cæsar, dead and turn'd to clay,[2079]
Might stop a hole to keep the wind away:
O, that that earth, which kept the world in awe,
Should patch a wall to expel the winter's flaw![2080]
But soft! but soft! aside: here comes the king. 205
Enter Priests, &c. in procession; the Corpse of Ophelia, Laertes
and Mourners following; King, Queen, their trains, &c.[2081]
The queen, the courtiers: who is this they follow?[2082]
And with such maimed rites? This doth betoken[2083]
The corse they follow did with desperate hand
Fordo its own life: 'twas of some estate.[2084]
Couch we awhile, and mark. [Retiring with Horatio.[2085] 210
Laer. What ceremony else?[2086]
Ham. That is Laertes, a very noble youth: mark.[2087]
Laer. What ceremony else?
First Priest. Her obsequies have been as far enlarged[2088][2089]
As we have warranty: her death was doubtful;[2090] 215
And, but that great command o'ersways the order,
She should in ground unsanctified have lodged[2091]
Till the last trumpet; for charitable prayers,[2092]
Shards, flints and pebbles should be thrown on her:[2093]
Yet here she is allow'd her virgin crants,[2094] 220
Her maiden strewments and the bringing home[2095]
Of bell and burial.
Laer. Must there no more be done?[2096]
First Priest. No more be done:[2088]
We should profane the service of the dead
To sing a requiem and such rest to her[2097] 225
As to peace-parted souls.
Laer. Lay her i' the earth:[2098]
And from her fair and unpolluted flesh
May violets spring! I tell thee, churlish priest,
A ministering angel shall my sister be,
When thou liest howling.
Ham. What, the fair Ophelia! 230
Queen. [Scattering flowers] Sweets to the sweet: farewell![2099]
I hoped thou shouldst have been my Hamlet's wife;[2100]
I thought thy bride-bed to have deck'd, sweet maid,
And not have strew'd thy grave.
Laer. O, treble woe[2101]
Fall ten times treble on that cursed head[2102] 235
Whose wicked deed thy most ingenious sense[2103]
Deprived thee of! Hold off the earth awhile,
Till I have caught her once more in mine arms:
[Leaps into the grave.[2104]