Title: The Gibson Book: A Collection of Published Works of Charles Dana Gibson. Vol. II
Author: Charles Dana Gibson
Release date: February 21, 2021 [eBook #64604]
Most recently updated: October 18, 2024
Language: English
Credits: Chuck Greif and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images available at The Internet Archive)
[Image of the book's cover is unavailable.]
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CONTENTS: (In certain versions of this etext [in certain browsers] clicking on the image will bring up a larger version.) (etext transcriber's note) |
A COLLECTION OF THE PUBLISHED WORKS OF
CHARLES DANA GIBSON
IN TWO VOLUMES
Vol. II
NEW YORK: CHARLES SCRIBNER’S SONS
R. H. RUSSELL
1906
Acknowledgment is here made to Messrs. Harper & Brothers (the publishers of seven of Mr. Gibson’s books), by special arrangement with whom this work is made possible.
Copyright, 1894, by R. H. Russell & Son.
Copyright, 1894, 1898, 1899, 1900, 1901, 1902, by Robert Howard Russell.
Copyright, 1897, 1903, 1904, 1905, 1906, by Charles Scribner’s Sons.
MISS BABBLES BRINGS A COPY OF A MORNING PAPER, AND EXPRESSES HER INDIGNATION AND SYMPATHY OVER A SCURRILOUS ARTICLE. MEANWHILE OTHER FRIENDS ARE CALLING UPON THE EDITOR.
SURE TO BE.
She: I AM SO ANXIOUS TO HAVE THESE THEATRICALS A SUCCESS. IF THE MEMBERS ARE ONLY ENTHUSIASTIC, IT WILL BE.
He: HAVE NO FEAR. EVERY MAN IN IT IS TO MAKE LOVE TO ANOTHER MAN’S WIFE.
A WARNING TO WIVES.
MRS. BOUNDERS KEPT HER HUSBAND UP LATE ONCE TOO OFTEN.
HE IS NOW TAKING HIS EASE IN A SANITARIUM.
“THEY SAY MISS CLINKER HAS SO MUCH MONEY SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH IT.”
“ISN’T SHE CHARITABLE?”
“NO, SHE REFUSED ME.”
She: YOU ARE SO AWKWARD IN YOUR LOVE-MAKING THAT SOMETIMES I AM SUSPICIOUS.
“OF WHAT?”
“THAT YOU MAY BE SINCERE.”
A DISPOSITION.
He: YOU’LL HAVE TO GO A LONG WAY BEFORE YOU WILL MEET ANYONE WHO LOVES YOU MORE THAN I.
She: WELL, I’M WILLING TO.
Mr. Meeker doesn’t object so much to his wife’s entertainments as he does to the way she uses his room for the gentlemen’s things.
HIS REVENGE.
Time: Any morning at 4:15.
Mr. Meeker, having been kept up late for the last twenty years and rebuked for his lack of interest, develops a sudden enthusiasm. Mrs. Meeker and the girls now do the waiting.
THE MAIN OBJECT.
He: WOULD YOU MIND IF I JOINED ANOTHER CLUB?
“OH, NO, DEAR! WILL IT KEEP YOU AWAY FROM HOME ANY MORE?”
THE HEIRESS.
Mr. Grubbs walks in his sleep and appears for the first and only time at an entertainment in his own house.
WHY NOT
have plate glass fronts to the opera boxes? The occupants could still be seen, but not heard.
THE NEXT MORNING.
Mrs. Innittor Dedd’s maid reads: “Among those present was Mrs. Innittor Dedd, whose lovely face and splendid figure were enhanced by a tiara of diamonds and three ropes of pearls. She wore her famous rubies and was even more regal than at the Bullyon’s ball the night before,” etc., etc.
MODERN CELEBRITIES.
An interesting discussion between the author of “The Barenness of Unkissed Kisses” and a famous dramatist.
WASTED ENERGY.
Professor Bung: A beauty? Well, perhaps she is.
Mr. Rattles: Why, man, haven’t you noticed the divine way she smiles?
“Oh, I’m not altogether unobservant. I have made a calculation, in fact, that the energy expended on her smiles, if scientifically applied, would run an automobile.”
A CROOKED TALE.
He: You promised to be my pupil and learn to love me.
“But it makes such a difference when your heart isn’t in your work.”
Mrs. Katcham prides herself on always having the latest celebrity at her house. To-night it is no less a personage than “Gouger.”